Girlfriends Mother

---

Im getting to the point where i cant fucking stand her. Well my girlfriend and I are both nearing 18 and have been together for awhile now. But her mother is starting to get on my last nerve.

Since we first started going out her mom was accusing her of having sex with me. She was constantly asking me girlfriend if she was having sex with me and when my girlfriend said no she would say "dont lie to me". This started 2 weeks after we started going out.

It still happens to this day (My girlfriend and i have been together about 4/5 months) Her mom constantly harasses her about this. First of all my girlfriend and I are not having sex and we both agreed that WHEN we do we will both use protection, we are smart responsible kids the last thing we want is to have a bunch of fuckin babies running around when we are only 17/18 years old.

My girlfriend and i are not allowed to hang out alone. Im not allowed to drive her around alone, my mom has to come with me to pick her up. We have to be like constantly baby sat. And now her mom is telling my girlfriend that shes not gonna let her come over to my house anymore because she doesnt think my mom is "watching us good enough". Like where the fuck did that come from, one day she just decided to start being rude to my mom and that she wasnt watching us, first of all how would she know if she is isnt here, and 2nd of all my mom watches us just fine (even though she thinks its retarted).

In short her mom is kinda loopy and its starting to drive me crazy. I hate being accused of shit i dont do, i dont like the fact she treats my mom like shit for no reason (im very defensive of my mom) and i hate the fact we have to be baby sat like 6 year olds constantly.

Has anyone ever had this problem? Im not going to leave my girlfriend obviously, 1 because i love her, and 2 because it isnt her fault her mom is like that its her moms fault so why would i take it out on my gf. But her mom and step dad constantly nag her not to fall in love with me because they think i want to have her married and sitting at home with kids at the age of 21 (because that what happened to her mom), which is not my intentions at all. I feel like their goal is to tear us apart no matter what.

Your girlfriend has it EASY! My sister wasn't able to even speak to guys that weren't part of the "family" until she was on her own in the real world. I think I would be the same way with my daughter but not THAT extreme. You have to understand, she's a mother. And that's her "little girl". Some parents have a hard time letting go or realizing their children are growing up. There are crazy people everywhere just willing to take advantage of young girls and guys. I'm not accusing you but I doubt she has something personal against you. Living in the world we do you just don't know. I say, give it some time. major hint. RESPECT!!!!!! Respect her mother at ALL times. Any parent who doesn't have respect from their child's gf or bf will certainly not like that person. Seriously, why would they. But you need to be more respectful to her. I'm not saying be a kiss up but no matter how rotten or nasty she is to you guys you need to respect her.Give it time. If you respond sour with sour you're going to have a SOUR situation. But if you are kind towards her and respect her wishes without being a bumchock then I'm sure she'll get used to you. If you can prove to her that you're not the way she thinks most young guys are you can gain her trust. AND you'll prove your love for your girlfriend by going the extra mile. My mother couldn't STAND my boyfriend. She had a death sentence out for him. She could have sworn he was going to rape me or something. But he treated her with kindness and respect despite how nasty she was to him. But that's my moms. She had people all over the neighborhood watching us like hawks. You'd think we were terrorists or something. But he continued to treat her with respect and being kind and eventually she just stopped her cruelty. Now they're like... the best of buds. I think she loves him more than she loves me! That dirty bastard.... sorry lolHope that helps.

I'm with Abi on this one.It's sometimes hard to tell if a mother's attitude is due to her motherly instincts or her personality. Perhaps her mom is just over protective and worries about her. And she has a right to be. I'm not saying you're a danger, but the world is a scary place and parents fear for their kids.The only thing you can do is just do your best to keep cool and be respectful. You can be mad at her all you want, but she isn't going anywhere as long as you're with your girl. I think you just need to give her more time for her to get to really know you. Continue to love and respect her daughter, and she'll see the good person you really are.You're not the only poor guy in the world and not the last. Even my boyfriend suffered from my mother's wrath. But in time, she got used to him around and finally realized that he and I are a real couple. And hopefully soon, the same will happen to you.Just hang in there and best of luck!PS, about the babysitting thing, I guess you just need to deal with that until the both of you are 18. MAYBE things will change.

I do treat her mother with alot of respect, we actually talk alot and have a good relationship. I doubt she even knows im mad at her. But i get the info from my girlfriend (about the accusations and stuff) and then it makes me mad on the inside but i would never say anything to her mother.I understand where her mom is coming from but sometimes i find it ridiculous to have someone checking on us every 5 minutes but that may mostly be because with all my other girlfriends we were able to be alone at anytime anywhere so this is kind of new to me.The thing that makes me mad the most is the harassment my gf has to take. Its apparently been like this her whole life and her and her mom have 0 relationship, and my gf wants out of there as soon as shes 18.But i appreciate your guys advice and you guys are right about the repsect thing and all of that. I dont have a problem dealing with the babysitting thing for a few more months, like i said i love her and thats not going to change.P.S. The thing that makes me mad about the sex accusations is that we couldnt have sex if we tried. We are checked on constantly and both of our houses are tiny as hell, we are 10-15 feet away from a parent at all times, thats why the accusations make me mad because they dont make sense.But oh well i can deal with it, im lucky to have such a wonderful girlfriend in the first place so i should be thankful for that and not worry so much about the parents. Thanks for helping me realize things!

Quote:I do treat her mother with alot of respect, we actually talk alot and have a good relationship. I doubt she even knows im mad at her. But i get the info from my girlfriend (about the accusations and stuff) and then it makes me mad on the inside but i would never say anything to her mother.you failed to mention that minor detail. if her mother is concerned about her then maybe it's YOUR GIRLFRIEND that her mother is worried about and not you. If they have "no relationship" then obviously her mother ha ALOT to worry about.

Yah sorry about that. I think the issue is more of her not trusting her daughter, but it takes 2 to have sex so if shes accusing her then i feel she is accusing me also (obviously). Oh well it isnt a big eal because my girlfriend and i know we arent having sex so thats all that matters.

There's something wrong with her asking her daughter if she was having sex and then when the answer was no, saying "Don't lie to me". But unfortunately there's nothing you can do about it.

one thing to keep in mind though.girls will ALWAYS become their mother's in a LTR.there's no exception. just like how guys are like their fathers.maybe not exactly the same, but there will be striking similarities.

Raven is right, I incurred a lot of wrath from her mom. To be honest, I respect her mother. Immensely. Because if it wasn't for her she wouldn't be in my life and if it wasn't for her she wouldn't be the kick ass person she is. I mean she and ravens dad did an awesome job raising her and I think they both kick most major ass! The only thing I have to add about how I feel towards her mother is that even though I respect her and think she kicks ass is that I am deathly afraid of her lol but I still feel the same way I stated above about her . Now about your problem, I think you should wait it out and most importanly respect her mother which you already do which is great. I also think it's good that you have a positive relationship with her mother and I truly respect you when you said you don't take it out on your girlfriend. But in due time I'm sure she'll lighten up.You have my support dude!

No there is not. That is complete Bull shit.

The only thing you can really do is live with it. Her mom isn't going anywhere. At least not until your girlfriend is stable enough to support her self and move out.