I am concerned about my future.

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For the past seven years, I have been a 'bad' person. But, what is 'bad'?Fat?Unsocialable?Unattractive?Defensive-asshole?Or maybe it's a mixture of them all, but if you mix all of those up, you come out with me.Fat - I hate the way I look. I have very few visual muscles, and they dont include the abdomen, pects, or biceps.Unsocialable - I dont talk to people a lot, I dont want them talking to someone low like myself, I am a waste of time.Unattractive - Yes I am. "Its not the looks that matters, it's the personality!"-And what if I look bad, AND have a bad personality?Defensive Asshole - How else can I be recognized?How am I suppose to be perfect with so many flaws? I exercise, I am a health freak, I lose a pound every week. I am making progress, but this progress is too slow, I am starting to have withdrawels, but I am not sure what they are for. Is being perfect really this hard? I am just sixteen, my darkest age. I want to be perfect, well, not really. I just want a good future, but will all of this self-sacrifice really be worth it in the future? And how long until the future starts to get better? One day? One decade?Hopefully someone can answer these questions.

no keep at it. and thats not what makes a bad person. And why do you think your low??? i wish i could lose a pound a week.

Godzilla, are you overweight?

I wish I could lose any amount of weight. 1 lb. a week isn't bad, 52 lbs a year then!

just keep working at it. Never think of yourself as low. Just keep going. Work out and find some activities that you find fun, it will help. It did for me.

In reply to:How am I suppose to be perfect with so many flaws? Are the people who are successful perfect? By no means. Is anyone perfect? No. The problem is not your flaws, but the fact that you think they make you not worth knowing. People are worth knowing anyway. You are worth knowing anyway.

I will never be perfect, but I want to be perfect, like everyone else. It's a wish, and wishes never come true. I have set a goal so impossibly high, that if even remotely accomplished, I should get something good out of it, but, wishes don't come true. I am tired of suffering everyday, when I see people my age taking the easy route, and it's working for them. Easy route, as in, DD (Drugs or Disorders). But, no, I will never turn to the dark side. I am taking a very long and hard route, and I know life isn't fair, but that doesn't mean I shouldn't get a break every now and then. The road ahead is long and I cant even see the end, and probably never will... I hope in the end, it will be worth the time I am spending on it.

It's the fact that you don't think you're worth talking to that worries me, CloudlessRane. In my experience nearly everyone is well worth knowing before undergoing self-improvement. By all means improve yourself, but don't wait until you've reached some standard that you are happy with. You probably will never be entirely happy with any standard, and, anyway, the way we learn and improve is by trial and error, by practice. Experience is usually more effective than theory, so start talking to people now.[Edited to correct my shocking typing.]

I talk to people, if I didn't say that earlier, sorry. I am a friendly person imo, compared to me 2 yrs ago, when I was a fat obnixious asshole. But in such a society, looks mean everything for first impressions, put it this way, people would want to know me more, but my presentation is horid, to the point where people avoid me. I am a last resort friend, not by choice though. I have lots of friends in my book, but they dont consider me a friend, until they have absolutely no one else to talk to, and it sucks. Yes, I am doing something about it, but this is the hardest challenge I have faced so far in my life. And that's what life is, a series of challenges, but this is by far the hardest, and will be the one that determines my future, so hopefully this self-sacrifice and suffering will pay off in the long run... hopefully

I still think how you feel about yourself makes more difference to your attractiveness as a friend than physical appearance. But you can work on both simultaneously.

I would rather be truthful about the way I look, rather then wasting my self-confidence on it, and going into denial...

I wouldn't want you to be dishonest. But when you say "I am a waste of time", that's not a fact, it's an opinion, and from a viewpoint that I think is distorted.

1 lb a week is awesome. I think the reason you're saying all of this is becuase you're not secure about yourself. Fat - You're losing weight, you just need patience. I bet in like 2 months people are going to start saying "Hey Mack, did you lose weight? Lookin' good bud."Unsociable - Unsociable? Maybe you're just shy. If you want to be more social, just start saying "Hi" to your friends if you pass them in the hallway, and ask small-talk questions like "So...How are you today?" etc.Unattractive - This is a confident issue. If you want to look more attractive, buy new clothes that look real spiffy (and match :P ), keep yourself well-groomed, try to get rid of any acne you have (if you don't that's great!) and any other things you can think of.Defensive asshole - I think this deals with confidence yet again. You need to worry less about what other people think/say about you. THeir opinion doesn't matter. Like today some gangsta ass pimp walked up to me and said "So is it tough being a geek?" I didn't let it phase me. I didn't say anything back to him since he's like twice my size. But I said to myself "I'm not going to let some jackass loser ruin my day. No I don't give a rat's ass about what he thinks of me. I don't even know the f*cktard."K, you need the right mindset. You're not ugly, you're not an asshole, and being shy isn't a bad thing. And you're losing weight so...I used to be in exactly the same situation that you are in right now, but I picked up a book that made me view the world a little differently. It's called "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens" By Sean Covey. It's a really good book.

I know I am losing weight... im just having doubts that it will not be worth the suffering later on, I guess ill just have to wait and see.

okay r u my clone ... ne ways i have all the same problems 1st dont try to lose weight , try to speed up your motabolism eat alot of fibers and whole grains 2 as hard as you may think it is find a girlfriend b e cause i know you dont want to be like that so wen you talk to your gf you can let out your tru feelings,3 get a class consoling group i no it sounds dumb but i know it helps just dont worry bout time youve got plenty of it ... from a fellow bad person in transition