Why did u do u continue to try to commit suicide?

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Im just cuurious, because everyone here says there down, but really never goes into deepth with whats eatting away at them. Then there are those that say I dont know why Im down, I just am...in otherwords your somewhat taking the chemical imbalance approach even if you dont come out and say it. Which by the way, nothing personal, (although I could be wrong) I dont believe that depression can be triggered from some imbalance and if it can, then I dont think it can on its own without the help of other evironmental circumstances. I wont like I tried killing myself 2 years ago, but for the following reasons:

1. I looked at my family who had always done everything they could for me and had always been there for me in the worst of situation, even though I showed them a lot of disrespect. I felt as though they deserved a better son than me.

2. I was having no luck finding a significant other. Someone that I could just relate with and totally enjoy being with day in an day out.

3. I was struggling in school while it seemed like my best friend was breezing through it. I was worried about whether or not Id make it.

4. I worried about my family's financial situation.

5. I was considering a religion change.

There were other things too, but those were the main 5, 4 of which still exist with the exclusion of #5. I dont know, I just feel lost at times. Like right now Im still kinda heartbroken over a girl I got to know over a period of 2 years, now of which isnt even in my life anymore after things went sour after we started dating. My best friend and I are on bad terms, becauses hes done with college and doesnt understand that I cant afford some of the things he does with the salary hes now making. Im just in that slump yah know?

I wish I had a better group of friends, better proffesors at school (not ones with ratings like these [http://www.ratemyprofessors.com/ShowRatings.jsp?tid=488246)][0], and a girlfriend as the bonus cherry on top. Anyone there with me lol But yea, as I asked, whats making you down nowadays?

[0]: http://www.ratemyprofessors.com/ShowRatings.jsp?tid=488246)

It looks like my link didnt take you to the exact teacher I was trying to give an example of but listen to just 3 of the 33 comments written and it will sum it all up:Drop if you are signed up for her class. She never tells you when things are due and just expects you to know without any verbal communication. She will belittle you by making you feel like you're stupid. Trust me on this one....you do not want to take her for any class!!! As a professor you lack professionalism, there is no need to brag about your family. I'm not interested in knowing that your sister went to Yale or that you come from a family of lawyers. I personally think the reason you tell these stories is because you haven't read the book. Maybe then we'd have a better understanding of the materialATTENTION ALL NEIU STUDENTS! IF AND I MEAN IT!!! IF YOU GET THIS TEACHER...DROP!!! THIS WILL BE THE BEST THING DECISION YOU COULD EVER AND I MEAN EVER MAKE IN YOUR LIFE. SHE IS A HORRIBLE TEACHER (FACILITATOR)

Instead of dropping, why not try to prove her wrong and go over what she expects? I dunno the whole circumstances, so dont yell at me if thats impossible lol.

Ive gone into detail several times why I'm having troubles right now (I've never, nor would i ever intentionally kill myself though)

It's just difficult for some people to full identify the problem especially if its something thats been happening for years and dont notice its a problem. there are other reasons too, but like you I dont know everyones problems.

I dunno, did that make sense?

I'm down cos....1. My fmaily has just fallen apart and I now just live me and my mum.2. Moved to a new city where I dont know anyone and I am very lonely.3. Sexually confused.4. I find it hard to look past my deep-seated prejudices.

I'm sorry to hear that, StrapingYoungLad. That's a lot of stresses to deal with at once.

About number 4, I think if you can recognise that something is a prejudice, you're doing much better than the person who thinks it's a self-evident truth.

Very true ineligible!

No one here needs to know why I'm down, and the only person who needs to know already knows so I'm good kthx

People will be left to wonder why you keep acting out, though, so don't be surprised by the hostile reaction.

Keep acting out? What do you mean?And there's already quite a bit out there about me ... if people really care they can search through my posts and find the stuff they want to know

i think everyone knows your having a tough time so they arent too judgmental of you.

I really won't blame people if they are too judgmental of me .... shit right now I'm fine, but who knows, in 10 mins I might be pissed as hell for whatever reason and bite everyone's head off on hereSo I wouldn't blame you if you were too judgmental Edit: Oh, and some people don't believe I'm "going through a rough time" (like white_lines and Steve) ... I guess they think .. I dunno? I dunno why the fuck I would make this shit up but that's for them to tell you

I just realized the question in the actual topic, so...> Why did u do u continue to try to commit suicide?Basically why I'm going to continue to try is because life is the shittiest thing ever and it won't get better, so why the hell should I live?Not saying I'm trying to kill myself every day, but I've tried a few times ... but I think I've found the perfect way to die... painless, quick, and it actually feels good...

well, white_lines is to stoned or drunk to really understand everything, and i dunno about steve. People deal with stress in different ways some bite peoples heads off, others shut down, denile ect.

Well I think we all know Steve is an idiotI'm actually surprised there is still a single person that doesn't hate/dislike me like you but whatever...

steve just reasons differently then you i think shrug You're not a continuos jerk the same way that another member is, and i dont know you in real life so i cant really say if i like you or dislike you.

Why do people always say that they can't say if they like/dislike someone just because they don't know them in real life?Am I the only one who thinks that's bullshit?Just from what a person writes you should be able to tell if you like them or not ... like I can definetely say I fuciking hate whitelines/Steve even if I don't know them in real lifeMaybe people say that because some people act different on the internet than in real life for some reason... whateverOr maybe you just don't wanna say that you don't like me? I dunno

nah you dont bother me at allSteve doesn't bother me eitherbut white_lines is a little pustule that should be poppedI know I'm different, on here im much more outgoing and talkative in real life.

nah you dont bother me at allWeird> Steve doesn't bother me eitherVery weird> but white_lines is a little pustule that should be poppedWhatever that means> on here im much more outgoing and talkative in real life.Well I guess that's true for most people ... obviously people are gonan be more outgoing and talkative on the internet than real life

Or maybe you just don't wanna say that you don't like me? I dunno I wanna say I dont like you.

I like practically everyone here - perhaps there's something wrong with me.