Is it going to/supposed to hurt?

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My b/f and I have been going out for a year and a half, give or take a month or two... and we've been biding our time, finding new little ways to make each other feel good...

The other day, he started fingering me, and we got it going well (after having some advice given)... but when we tried to do it again, I was very uncomfortable, he couldn't find what it was he had felt before, and it was hurting when he tried to go deeper into me, when it hadn't been before. Actually, it was more of a stinging than anything else... Anyway, I was wondering if we were doing something wrong or if there's a "right" way to do it. I think it had something to do with the fact that his finger was dry, but I don't know anything about this. Please offer your advice.

Also, a friend told me that losing my virginity would not be painful, but I read here that it is. Is there any way whatsoever to make it not hurt? Or will it always hurt to some extent?

Thanks,
shadowstrider

Seeing that you are a virgin, chances are that your hymen is still intact which means that when he fingers you he stretches it and that may hurt...the first time it may have been painless because he got right into the opening. Lube is certainly a good idea, and some discomfort may have been caused because of that...so consider some lube, or at least saliva.For most girls, loosing their virginity is painfull/umcomfortable because the hymen is tearing, but i imagine that even with an already torn hymen, it may cause some pain because a penis is a fairly large object that's entering a vagina that's not used to that. I'm not aware of any ways of lessening the pain, although training yourself slowly with graduated dildos (so i've heard on this board) or something similar may help, I haven't tried though - i relied on my bf to be slow and gentle.

Make sure his finger nails are cut down, that hurts I get fingered and his fingers are long. It does hurt the first time for most girls, it did for me. But, I had an orgasm my first time and he was pretty big for a guy, so I guess I had both. Everything is different for everyone. If your cherry isn't popped, you may also bleed alot, the first time you have sex. Do you use tampons, or does he finger you alot?The feel good spot, really, is your clit. Does he touch that, or just go inside you with his fingers?

He's only fingered me a few times... though I imagine when we get the hang of it, it'll be a little more often, lol. But I'm not much into tampons either.I'm guessing that because I'm not sure if he's gone up that far, he hasn't... he hasn't told me that he's felt anything like that, and I haven't either. Would it tickle or something like that when he touches it? Thanks for your help!shadowstrider

<I'm guessing that because I'm not sure if he's gone up that far, he hasn't... he hasn't told me that he's felt anything like that, and I haven't either. Would it tickle or something like that when he touches it? >>ok, not sure what you think he can feel. If you are talking about your clit,it is on the outside of your vagina-your pee hole area. It feels good when it gets touched. Have him message that. Make out a little until you feel yourself getting wet and feeling good down there, and then have him mess with that area. Or do it yourself by yourself so you can tell him what to do and help you both out. I like to bring out some of the vagina juices to the clit so my finger glids better and it feels better. The nerves are in this area and feel the best when played with, there is also a "g-spot" inside of your vagina, behind the big cirlce area right inside your vagina then behind that is a spot that feels good when touched, the g-spot. You casn have orgasms from either one of those places being played with, it is awesome. I asked you if you use tampons or if he fingered you alot, because both of those can cause your cherry to pop. It is just what causes some girls to bleed when they have sex for the first time. I use tampons as a teenage and had been fingered before I had sex, so I didn't bleed the first time I had sex. It isn't bad if you bleed, just be prepared incase you do bleed so you don't get blood everywhere. Understand?