Today in art class, we were painting..I got ahold of the red and started throwing it on my paper. After a while I got this strange feeling of happiness. I then started to pour it on my hands and let is drip down my arms. As is dripped on my skin I needed to rub it in. I started to rub the red paint really hard into my skin. As I rub and push harder, my nails start geting in the way. I noticed that there suddenly was a different shade of red showing. Someone came over and said. "are you okay?" As those inquisative words rang through my ears, I fell towards the ground. The next thing I knew, I was in the hospital. They said that I had blood poisening really bad, and it was too late. My mother and my father are at my side crying and i softly whisper to myself, "I'm coming to be with you Scott"This is not true...I just thought about it..and yes I did try rubbing it that hard today....am i screwed up?
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Red
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will someone please talk....just say something
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Between that and your recurrent nightmares, it sounds like you're very troubled. You really need to seek out professional help. There's nothing wrong with talking to someone in person.Who is Scott?
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im guessing a dead friend or brother.Hon, you really need to get that help.
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What kind of paint was it?
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accrillic paint...and Scott was the guy i loved that decided to kill himelelf November 28th this year. He wasnt goth or anything....he was on the wrestling team and he was sooooo hot. I miss him so much..I even think of repeating his actions just so that i could see him.
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does that make me sound crazy.. i dont wanna b crazy but my mom says i often yell at myself in my room for no reason....but i can't remember that
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If you kill yourself, you won't see him. You will be dead.What are you doing to get help? You need help. Do your parents realize that anything is wrong?
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he is dead...i would be dead.... we would be together....duh
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You know, that didntwork out to well for romeo and julliette, so i dont think it would work for you either.
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he is dead...i would be dead.... we would be together....duh You'll be dead! What does it mean you'll "be together"? How can you be together if you don't exist?You need to get some help with your depression / nightmares / cutting / bizarre ideas. You don't sound very happy. What are you doing to get help? Do you think it's OK to think about suicide?
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Its all well and good asking for help on this board, but there is only so much advice we can give you. As Steve said you need to see a trained profesional who will help you. You obviously WANT help or else you would not be posting here. I would suggest you go get it as soon as possiable and speak to your parents about this matter. If you want help you will go and get it if youre just looking for attention then dont, that simple really. Im pretty sure a profesional could help and would be very understanding and helpful with your problems far more than we probrably can. What have you got to loose?