17 with a baby and kicked out

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i got pregnant with my son when i was 16. when i was 6 months pregnant my mother moved me into an one room efficiency appartment. once the baby was born my mom said she didnt have the rent so now i live with my boyfriend. i want to get my own place but im not 18 noone is helping me financially, i just went back to work but im probably going to have to quit because i dont have a babysitter and i cant afford daycare. i know that im a good mom but my boyfriends mother acts like everything i do is wrong and she is a saint. i cant take it anymore i want out of here but i have nowhere to go and ohio isnt an emancipation state. im scared to go to welfare because i dont think they can help me. what if they take my baby? i just cant stand being treated like im incompetant...another thing, shes always threatening to kick us out, and the thing that pisses me off the most is she acts like shes his mother and that because im younger than her that she doesnt have to listen to me when it comes to my son. i have asked her not to smoke around him and ive caught her holding him and smoking a dozen times. one day she was throwing him in the air and catching him and i told her to stop and not to do it anymore and she just looked at me and told me that she would just do it when i wasnt around.....i cant win and shes tearing me own and the worst part is that she knows i cant say anything because i have noone and nothing. i just want someone to tell me what to do.ive been confused since the moment i got pregnant but im trying and im doing a good job. the whole situation reminds me of something you would see on a bad lifetime movie! next thing i know she'll be calling herself mommy! oh and my boyfriend is not the father so she is nothing to my son.

I'm sorry to hear about your predictament. I think it doesn't sound like a good idea to stay with your boyfriend's mother. I don't know what kind of support systems they have in your area, but I'm guessing there will be some kind of group for teen mothers. Also you are entitled to collect child support from the child's father, it may not be much but every little bit helps. If you are entitled to go onto welfare I suggest you do so.

What kind of trash is your boyfriend's mother? Smoking around your baby is just unacceptable, but throwing him in the air is beyond that. It's serious abuse. Is that woman demented, or just very stupid?You have to find a way to get out of there. You cannot live with that woman. You need to talk to whatever welfare / assistance offices you can find. They won't take your baby because you're asking about public assistance. Is there anyone you can go to for help?And WTF is wrong with your boyfriend? Is he bulldozed by his mother? Is there any way that you and he can move somewhere together? Does he have a job? Is your mother willing to help in any way (day care, money, food....anything)?

You have got to get out of that house for your baby's health. She'll kill him either by dropping him when she tosses him in the air, or by second hand smioke. (I wish i could say more, but im unbelievably unnerved by teen pregnancies)

Well for the mother throwing him up in the air...maybe thats her way of playing with him...alot of parents do that?...if it's too high tho then thats differet....the smoke thing....i mean in her own house she prolly can smoke....just she prolly doesn't need to anywhere near or around the baby at all.....and you kinda are the person liveing with them......it is kinda their house...tho of coarse they should care more about baby....so why can't you live with your own mom?..kicked out i guess?

Im speaking from knowing a little boy that was being tossed into the air while being 'played with' and got dropped, he cracked his skull on the coffee table and suffered serious damage. For parents that do that, they really shouldnt.

**just my two penneth on the throwing thing............i have played with all my kids by throwing them up in the air and catching them, and every parent i know does the same..........and calling it serious abuse..............give me a break........... the word abuse means done to harm, and i don't think that thats the case, when people play with their children like that.

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OK, that was over the top, but the boyfriend's mother seems to have problems with judgement. I wouldn't have her toss my baby.I hope that notmyfault check with her state's welfare agency for information. There is help available.

she said she had the baby at 16, and she is 17 now, isent it a little to early to start throwing a 1 year old baby?

well i have to say that as bad as your BF's mother might be, she DID take you and the baby in, when your own mom didn't..........so she has to have a bit of credit for that.The fact that you sound very depressed, about your situation for a start might have something to do with the way you see comments, made by the BF's mom, she might not mean things the way they come across. All new moms, feel like they are being watched, and ALL older moms, do the "well you ought to do this, or try that" routine, I find myself doing it, and that kinda thing can be taken as critisism, especially if you are feeling low. As for being scared of going to welfare, well if you are a good mom, which i am sure you are, taking your baby will be the last thing on their minds, they will want to help you, i have had a lot to do with social work over here and keeping the family together is THE most important thing, (sometimes wrongly i might add )as for not smoking, around him, well i agree its the wrong thing to do, smoking around anyone, never mind children, however, you are both in her house, and in that you can't dictate when she smokes, tho its not to much to ask that she maybe goes into another room to do it.As for the throwing thing, she probably thought "what the hell is she getting all stressy about" i mean, like i said to steve, i did that with all my babies, and its not meant to harm them in any way, she probably did it with her baby and doesn't seem why you are getting so stressed out about it.And the last sentence kinda makes me think that the BF's mother is finding it hard too. I mean how must she feel to have taken in a woman and a child, the child NOT her own grandchild, and the fact that her house is not her own anymore, children come with a heap of 'things' not to mention having you both in the house is a big restriction and responsability.There sounds like there are a lot of problems, but i don't beleive that someone who would take in a girlfriend of her sons, and another mans baby can be all that bad.I think you ought to speak to someone about post natal depression, it sounds like everything that has happened, might have taken a toll on you, AND, PND is very common, even if there arn't other circumstances that can cause new mothers to feel down in the first place.

you can't dictate when she smokesExcept around the baby. You should be able to dictate that she doesn't smoke when she is near the baby. It should be well known now that it can cause big problems. (Dr. Jeffrey Chapman of the Cleveland Clinic was just on MSNBC talking about it, and about the state of California having declared secondhand smoke a toxic air pollutant.)

yes in theory i agree............but it's her house and she may be of the mindset that she should be able to do anything, within her own 4 walls............some people are like that, and you don't know, she might be feeling the stress of having them both in the house too, and is at a, "she can't tell me what to do" frame of mind...........situations like this can very quickly deteriorate, to where no-one respects eachother or their viewpoints, and people stop talking and caring and start shouting and not giving a shit.

You need to go to welfare. They will not take your baby. They can also provide you with emergency assistance in the form of money, food stamps, medical insurance, etc. while you are waiting for all the paperwork to go through. They will also set you up with getting child support from the father.Good luck!

Sorry, that's life. You shouldn't have opened your legs because you were stupid enough to beleive some deadbeat loved you. Have fun sucking up welfare and WIC while honest hard-working Americans who were responsible enough to plan out their families pay for it.

What fucking right does a stoner asshole like you have casting judgment on this girl. She made one mistake to your 1,573,094.

I don't care, when I was in high school I never got laid, I saw any the pretty girls with the assholes who just wanted to fuck them, now I can laugh at those sluts who got pregnant and destroyed their own lives.

I thought you were the one who used to do things like that. Guess I misjudged you. Sorry.

he no, hes this way cause he never got laid.

ah, the truth.

That scores a zero in helpfulness, and a ten in bitterness, anger, self-pity, and contemptuousness.