Bullies...how to deal with them?

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In reply to: and while its nice to have your own voice and your own look and your own style of dressing, its not worth it if it means getting bullied. WRONG! This is the difference between having character and being a kool-aid drinker. Conforming will not help. If they bully you before you conform, they will bully you because you conformed. That's not what bullying is about. That is a horrible life lesson you are trying to teach.

Conforming will not help. If they bully you before you conform, they will bully you because you conformed.Exactly!!

Yes what you said is very true. If the bullies see you dressing like them they will make fun of you for that. Some of my ''friends'' bully people and it pisses me off so much. But dont worry its not like i sit around and do nothing i lay into them for it and they stop.

you know what? All my advice has been pretty crappy, looking over it. Let me rephrase it now my state of mind is clearer:you have a right to feel confident and happy in life. if you're stuck in school, 6-7 hours a day, the least you need is having to worry about some nasty piece of crap pushing you or making you feel insignificant. When i used to get bullied, id go through several stages. Id look around me at all the people who didnt get the same treatment and id envy them so much it hurted. Then id look at myself and blame myself, because i believed the only possible explanation for my being bullied was that i was weird and drew negative attention to myself. I would never feel happy, all i wanted was for everyone to just leave me alone, but nobody ever did. Bullies dont care what happens to you when you're older, and they dont care that you may need therapy. As long as they can show off to their friends and feel in control, nothing else matters. Now, after all that, my suggestion is this:Do learn some form of fighting, or do exercise, or both. Simply because if someone throws a punch at you for no reason, you will be able to defend yourself. Otherwise, avoid fighting. Its not worth getting suspensions on a good school record just to slap the smile off of some prick's face.Be confident, walk confidently, tell yourself 'im smarter than them, they will be working in mcdonalds while im making millions' and remember that they can never take your personality or your intelligence from you. Laugh. When someone makes a nasty comment, laugh in a way that says 'oh man, i feel sorry for you' like a kind of 'pfft, loser' laugh. Laugh when they try and stop you when you're walking to class. Hell, even laugh when they push you. If you've ever seen 'fight club' you'll understand why.Tell your parents everything. Make them promise not to tell the school, tell them that you want to be able to trust them and that they dont need to call the school because that worsens things and schools dont know how to deal with bullies, whatever the PTA might tell you, and they will hopefully understand. At the very least, after a day of being bullied, you can hug your mom and tell her how bad it was and she will know, and that will make you feel a million times better. Trust me.Best of luck man, remember, today's bully is tommorow's mcdonalds worker.-AK edit: can someone please start a thread for people to say if theyve ever been bullied? One thing that helps is knowing that its not just you.

In reply to:can someone please start a thread for people to say if theyve ever been bullied? One thing that helps is knowing that its not just you.Done.

Africa, you speak the truth....and tugged on my heart strings doing it.

Well said, Africa! I don't think I could have put it any better. I have to disagree with the typical advice of ignoring bullies. Wouldn't that just make them try that much harder? You have to stand up for yourself in some way or another.

Wow, I must be stupid. I've never really talked to my parents about it... :/

I never talked to my parents about it when it was happening either.I've been talking to them recently about research I've been doing on bullying and about the anti-bullying house bill here in Kentucky, wondering if they have any clue why I'm so passionate about it. Finally, several weeks ago, I was at their house and I asked them if they knew that I was being bullied when I was a kid. They were clueless. Typically, parents won't know unless you tell them.

0_o Wow

I told my parents, and they told the principal who basically told them there was nothing he could do. I ignored them, but that didnt help much, buut eventually I got older, and bigger than them, and the bullying stopped.

kick em in the nuts twice and run away.

i not gonna lie u use to be a really mean person, i mean really really mean, lets just say i humilliated a friend of mine on the radio for the whole city of huston to hear, and a former friend of mine use to do the same thing to some kids a year younger in gym. decided that being mean didnt make me cool. but thats beside the point.first going to the administration and having them confront them probabaly isnt the best idea, the kid we picked on did that, i denied it and then we gave the kid a harder time by turning his only friend against him. i'll tell you what the kid did that worked for AWHILE, he sarcastically agreed with all of our insults. ex) us: wow ur such a loser him: yeah i guess i am a total loser.i say this worked for a while because my friend call him a loser non-stop for an entire week whenever he would see him. but these bullies probably arent as persistent as we were because our goal was to make someone cry by the end of the year so the first week of school we picked out the weakest nerdiest kid in our gym class. (oh my god looking back im probably going to hell for all of these terrible things ive done to some poor kid i called wizard) but i hate to say this, but if their somebody like me the is almost nothing you can really do about it unless you can bring absoulte incriminating proof, but the thing was we never laid a hand on him our attacks were only verbal for that reason that unless he recorded it there was no proof.

All I can say is, he's 13. Punch him hard enough in the face and I guaruntee you he will cry like a baby.

punch him in the face..
I am guessing your assuming he is not gonna do anything?
if you punch him..
he's probably kick your ass... and, you'll be the one crying.