my parents have really high expectations for me that i can't meet. they always say i need to get a 4.0 GPA and i got a 3.4 GPA and now it's like they're flipping out every moment and whenever they can yell at me for not having the highest GPA possible. they also say i need to get into harvard or else they will have no reason to live anymore and stuff. they make me feel so guilty for not meeting up to their exceptations and i was wodnering how to deal with this.
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Expectations
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Scare them...tell them youll drop out if they keep it up...immature,yes, but it is still 2x more mature than how they are acting. Its good to want the best for your child, but thats taking it over to disrespect and telling you that you arent good enough. That type of parenting gets a 1.0 GPA.
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No. Do not tell them that you are dropping out. Let them know how pressuring you like that is bothering you, and making it more difficult to get the grades you know you can.
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I agree with Java. Play that maturity card!
If you act mature when they aren't, maybe they'll notice. Maybe they won't. But at least you're being mature and actually increasing the chances of their cooling their jets about it. -
exactly. If you want to be treated like an adult, you have to act like one. My parents were the exact same way, but i was better off in the end for them pressuring me to do well.
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they are exactly right, my advice was terrible, but my point was in that situation just telling them that thier pressure might cause you to break may not be enough to realize it and ease up a little.
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That's one of the reasons it is the mature thing to do. It is mature to do the right thing because it is right, not based on what the outcome might or might not be.
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Unfortunately many parents try to live through their children. They look to their children to do the things they didn't, to do things better than they did, and they feel they are judged by their children's performances. It's not fair or reasonable, but it happens all too often, and it seems to be especially strong in East Asian cultures.I don't think knowing that helps much in dealing with it, but it might help assuage the guilt feelings. It derives from a faulty perception of what parenting is about, not something you have done wrong.