in front of a bunch of people two weeks ago my gf ask me if i masturbated. i told her i did, and she became upset because she said it trivializes our sex life, because i could just beat off.for the last two weeks i've been thinking about this now, and everytime she comes over to go have sex......i get nothing. i can't get rock hard like i did before. i mean my habits were the same, but after all this now, i get nothing. my gives me oral and it feels awesome. but it doesn't get hard. but for some reason, whenever we'll be together, if she just brushes it or something. i get solid as a rock. it doesn't make any sense. is it just tremendous guilt i feel, or am i getting performance anxiety? whats the deal. i love her to death and it nothing like i'm not attracted to her. i love being with her, and around her and loving her and being intamite. whats wrong with me.worst case senerio is me stop masturbating, which i'm willing to do, but it doesn't make anysense. i had the same habits before, and now its doing all this. i'm very lost, i'm wondering if i should get some pills to help stimulate(not like viagara) things. i mean as you can see i'm buggin out. hell the first thing i thought of was that i had erectile disfunction. but i'm too young for that. i'm 20.can someone help me answer these questions
Your gf doesn't know much about male sexuality - she needs someone to tell her that all males masturbate, and if they didn't, the women would be worn out.
You're not getting hard with sex because what she has said has now come between you. You feel insecure, and you subconscious is perhaps taking a kind of revenge on her. Since you get hard in other situations, it's nothing physical, and it's not something wrong with you, it's a problem in your relationship.
Ideally you should both sit down with a sex counsellor. At the very least you two must talk. It doesn't trivialise your relationship that you can beat off - having sex with her, when you could beat off, shows that you value her. If she were your only sex release, sex with her would be less about her, wouldn't it?
Nevertheless, abstaining from masturbating for a couple of days before you see her would help your hardness.
And remember bro - once things don't quite work right, we get all freaked about it and that makes it worse. You know your penis works - it does get hard. Don't think about how it isn't doing that as well these days, just enjoy the moment. And by the way - that was a terrible thing for her to do to you and her response sucked. It has nothing to do with "trivializing your sex life" she really needs to have a better understanding about male sexuality. That said, forget about the less hard erections and get with it!