The End

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The only feeling that I can express is my undying need to express my feelings.

What a ridiculous paradox to be stuck in every day of your life. Contained inside my head is the biggest mess that I could possibly imagine and the only common quality of each individual, insignificant thought is they are all a result of my absolute boredom with life.

I have honestly lost any sense of my grip to the mortal coil. I need not what this world offers as it offers nothing but shit. My mind will find more peace demolished and splattered on a busy road than in any of my past experiences.

And what is my response to these feelings, these thoughts, these ludicrous, laughable, lethargic, mind-ripping assaults on my daily life? Nothing, of course. What could I do? Join the ever-increasing legion of life-takers? Nah, been down that road, its just not my thing.

It still seems like the ideal solution, though. To quit, to just stop doing the same things day in, day out. To leave the mundane, the uninteresting and the tedious, unvaried, tiresome excuse that is life. Movies, television and music have lied to me my entire life, there is no adventure. Love, supposedly, is an adventure and my life is not without love. My parents love me, my friends love me, my girlfriend loves me... but I cannot say the same about them. And this is not to say that I don't love them, maybe I do, my worry is that I do not know if I am even capable of loving.

How does it feel to love? To be in love? "When you're in love, you just know." The line excreted by the fanciful world of popular culture. What if I don't know? Is it possible that I've gone 20 years without ever loving a single human being? I know attraction, raw animal lust, a basic instinct. But when does the love kick in?

Well, the end of the rant has been reached. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did. If you've reached this far then you are obviously as nuts as I am. I bid you a good night and a good life, as tonight, I am no more.

We've missed you Bob! :frowning:

I wish I could say something that would help, but I can't find the right words. You're one of the most intelligent fellows I've come across here, with a good side of sarcasm. I believe you have a lot to offer to the world, so don't give up.

If i was you. . . Just leave the love, do what you want, when you want to. Don't feel restricted by this need to love, it will come when you find inner peace, it is so hard to love and feel loved when you aren't happy with who you are or what your doing. By the sounds of it, you are a well known member, and i have probably got completely the wrong end of this stick, but just live life to what you want it to be, and when you find your own happiness, love will follow.

:]

Farewell, o thou ever so dramatic one.

Welcome to the truth.

This world is a lie.

It sounds like depression, bob.

Whether life is an adventure or a boring meaninglessness depends on how you look at it, rather than what it actually is. Depression makes you look at everything through dark grey glasses.

Try to do some new things. If you can, travel.

Quote:I bid you a good night and a good life, as tonight, I am no more. Wait, what does that mean Bob? I was just telling SteveA a week or so ago how good you were doing....what happened hunny?

Tis only a metaphor.Sexpert: You're a lovely guy, but blow me.

I've been feeling the same as you lately, just not with regard to love, more about boredom and wanting and... I don't have the mental fortitude to talk about it now... it's not been a good past few days.So, I'm giving myself over to hate, as I often do, 'till some distracting fancy momentary steals my attention from that, that I cannot deal with.

Bobbo!Ya know I keep meaning to get high and write you a long email, but it seems when I get high I get distracted and normally end up baking cookies or just watching tv and fucking like rabid minx! I am glad to see your little Irish ass back though, and will at some point get around to writing you an email.

Love was merely an example, seemed like a common one that most could identify with.

bobbo ya got my hello in another reply so this one is about you instead of to you.20 years with out ever hainv loved anyone?100% possible. outsid eof family and my kids I did it for over 30 years. I consider myself lucky to have julie, shes the first one i think i ever really loved. there was one that got to me before julie, fucked me up for a couple of year, but looing back I dont think i loved her, but I thuogth I did at the time, and for a long time after.as to adventure, your a liar, there is lots of adventure left, alot of risk.You and I are the same in many respects.I crave attention, and adventure. its what got me into rock climbing and mountaineering.you want some adventure? go for a walk for a few days, in the woods alone. Take a back pack and some clothes and gear and some food but not enough to eat for the total time your gone.find shit and kill it to eat, fish, rabbits, squirell what the fuck ever ya got in the area to eat. adventure still can be found, and so can danger in the deep dark woods, get int caving, even in groups I get that sense of adventure in caving. Dont call it spelunking, people are stupid and 90% of them ask me what the fuck that shit is, its caving!set some goals, then achieve them! I got some I havent yet, but I will, or Ill die attempting them. I still need to sumit some mountains that I have yet to do so, Everest, K2, Denalli, I have however gotten stuck on knife back ridge, in a storm in an emergency bivy that I thought I was going to die on on granite peak in montana on a return from the summit, overnight in a snow cave in an exposed ridge with wind ripping by so fast I thought I was going to go over the edge, and was actually surprised to walk down to my base camp the next morning as the sun came up or the 3 attempts that I took and failed each time in the wind river range for a summit to the highest peak in wyoming. weather kicked my ass every time.There is adventure left, not like there was once in this world, but there is still some sense of danger and not knowing the outcome before it happens.the adventure part and adrenaline is what I live for, its not about me dying, its about me finding a way to live.The mess in your head will never go away, but it does help you to be able to walk through it all with out breaking yuor neck falling over some of the shit.

But the problem is much bigger than mere love or the like, I would be willing to bet. Something more enigmatic that most don't, or at least seem not to be able to comprehend....the emptiness of existence.I now it's depression but altering ones perspective doesn't alter reality. And, reality must be dealt with... but changing reality means destruction... forget it, I said I don't have the whatever to write about this and I don't, so...

Originally Posted By: bobalicious

Sexpert: You're a lovely guy, but blow me.

Uh, please don't try to solicit me for sex. It goes against this site's policy and against my personal beliefs.

Quote:Uh, please don't try to solicit me for sex. It goes against this site's policy and against my personal beliefs. are you shitting me?Ok its bobbo, Im not gonna have sex with bobbo either but if it was a hot girl of legal age and you were single, would you stil have it against your beliefs that she should not be allowed to pay you for sex?Im betting your beliefs would change real fast.

He he! Maybe you're right. I always say never make any strong statements about yourself if you've never been encountered with that situation. Too many people say," I'd never do that," And they get caught doing it. Mostly very conservative political figures or religious people that get caught doing these things, that's why both conservatives and extremely religious people often piss me off, they very often live out a completely opposite life to the one they are preaching.

So now its ok to solicit you for sex? :wink:

Sho Nuff

Wooohooo!!!

Do you have red hair and freckles?

No, thankfully I'm not THAT Irish.