Hi...first off, its really great that there is a place to talk about this, cuz sometimes it really depresses me, and i can't always talk to my bf about it. Well, ive been dating the same guy since high school, and he's a bit older than me, (he's 32 im 19) i don't think age is important, but, since he's older, he's obviously been with more ppl than me. Im guessing about 12 girls in all. I met him at a friends house when i was in high school, and weve been together ever since. We fell completely, madly in love...and he was my first love, and my first sexual experience.although i had been molested by my grandfather years before, it doesnt count, because i kept my virginity. Before my bf, i had never dated anyone for longer than a week or two, and i certainly had never loved another guy. A few months ago, i got a really painful blister inside one of my vaginal lips, i figured it was razor burn, and went to bed that night feeling fine. THe next day, when i went to take my morning pee, the pain was so intense that i almost threw up. it was like peeing fire, nothing could make it stop burning. For couple days, i tried to ride it out, all the time not knowing what it was. Finally, i decided to go to the doctor, fearing the worst...and i was right. I was diagnosed with herpes, and my bf and i just sat there and cried for what seemed like an eternity. i had the most empty feeling, like my life was over. i felt like i was stuck with him forever..if we ver broke up, i would have to find a guy that either has herpes, or didnt mind me having herpes... All i could think was why me? what did i do to deserve this? It got worse, because my BF never got an outbreak, and i was so insanely jealous of him. He felt horrible because he knew it was his fault, and seeing him cry almost hurt worse than the doctor's results.I know ive been rambling on and on with this post, but i just really want to know why i have the most horrible luck, why does everything good that happens to me have to have a horrible consequence? it isnt fair that i have to have this fear every month that im going to have another outbreak, and he's never even had so much as a blister. why me??
That's a very hard question. Good and bad things in this life aren't always given on merit or demerit; all too often it goes the other way.
Its true, one mistake can cost someone dearly, where others who constantly commit many mistakes dont suffer at all.
HOW LONG DID YOUR SPYMTOMS LAST FOR? CHECK OUT MY POST UNDER SCARED SHITLESS AND TELL ME IF ANY OF THAT SOUNDS THE SAME
I can understand your "why me?"
Before ever sleeping with my partner I made him go to an std clinic to be tested and the results came out fine. So I slept with him and within 2 days I had herpes symptoms. Neither of us knew at the time that an std check up doesn't test you for herpes unless you tell them you have had any sores etc. My partner didn't realise that the white bumps he had been getting on his penis were Herpes...he had just always thought it was friction burn causing the few white lumps. Can you imagine how I felt also after being so careful and yet still getting an std........I felt sick.
I want another child but now am filled with fear because of what I have.
This std is for life.
I have an outbreak at least once a month...sometimes more.
My symptoms are a lot more than my partner gets.
This virus does now affect my sex life.
I could go on....
And yet I thought I was safe because I thought I was being careful...how wrong was I?!