I figure this would be fun. Share your worst sexual encounter you've ever had.I had my worst sexual encounter tonight. I show up at her house and she's standing in the driveway smoking a cigarette. As I get out of my car, she comes up to me takes one more puff and then goes in for the kiss. She made up for it by finishing up her cigarette about 5 minutes later and then pops a peice of orbits gum into her mouth. Maybe the mix of good and bad taste will take my mind off of the fact that she kisses like a fish. So, we're sitting in her driveway for about an hour and a half talking about pretty much nothing. There wasn't substance to the conversation, just her die hard sarcastic sense of humor which tends to get on my nerves. "Why are we in the driveway again?" "Because we're waiting for my brother to go to sleep"Well, it seemed like her brother was going for an all nighter watching TV in the living room. So, after making out and playing with each other, we move into her SUV. Come to find out, she doesn't know how to maneuver or anything. Finally, when we start to have sex, about literally 20 seconds into it I blurt out "This sucks." Shortly after, I leave with a very dull ache where it counts.That's pretty bad... but I'm sure there's worse. Someone make me feel better! lol
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Worst sexual encounters
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pfffft I got worse.Halloween about ohhh 5 ? maybe 6 years ago.I hit a party I knew about and met this girl. I was dressed up like jesus, and she started talking shit about jesus wearing underwear. I told her jesus didnt and to get on her knees and worship me. She slipped her hand up my sheet, rubbed my dicka bit and about ten minutes later we end up in the bathroom and shes blowing me, and she is NOT good. she sucks so bad I can hardly keep a fucking hard on, but being the bastard I am I decide Im going to finish no matter what.20 minutes later people are knocking on the door and to hurry up I grab her by the back of her hair and jerked off in her mouth.When this all started I saw the ring on her finger and thought nothing of it, what sorta woman would come to a party with her hubby and jerk off some stranger in the kitchen in full view of everyone?coming out of hte shitter, I walked out, she walks out half a second behind me and some ass hits me in the side of hte head and proceeds to beat my ass, I get picked up anc arried outside and thrown off the deck into the snow wearing nothign but a sheet and sandals.I layed there for a few minutes on my back smoking and decided I could beat his ass had I known I wa about to be in a fight so I finished my smoke, walked back in and started looking for the mother fuck to get some payback over blindsiding me.Turns out I was wrong, I got my ass beat 2 times in under 10 minutes.The last time I layed in the snow sucking wind trying to get my breath back, and walked a block away to where my car was parked and headed home.Another time I was banging this indian girl, and that was all good, then she is suddenly trying to sticka big ass dildo in my ass, I asked her what the fuck she thought she was doing, her only reply was "well, my husband likes it"One thought kept running thru my head, my hard on said good bye and while i was getting dressed to leave I had to ask her," just because your husband flikes a vibrator in his poophole, what the fuck makes y think I would? and lets say that I did like it, why would i want some shit stick you had in his ass pushed up my O-ring ?Il take your experiene to either of those any time.
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I wouldn't want to stand in the way of your worst sexual encounter, but why on earth did you have sex with that woman in the first place?
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I hope buddy at the party remembered to punch his slut wife too
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"You know how you guys are--you can't turn down a piece of ass"I'm the dude that proves you wrong...I have (turned it down) before, and I certainly will again...it's inevitable these days. I don't use rubbers and there's far too much bad ju-ju going around. My worst is yet to come...there will likely be some day in my life, down the road, where little willie won't salute the flag anymore. But why worry about it?
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That one is solved by sticking to one partner who feels the same about it as you do. If you know you're both clean to begin with, you both stay clean. Only guys who sleep around have to worry about their dick exploding one day.
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I don't get involved with folks who "cheat"...I can smell them coming a mile away. (They fall into the "flake" category.) And there are many ways to be sure the other person is clean...medical tests are one of them. There are others.If you sleep around a lot, or hang with folks who do, then yeah...you should use a rubber. Casual sex bumps the odds that you're going to catch something way up.
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I can't think of one that was really terrible. There have been a few unspectacular moments over the years and even a few times when my body decided not to cooperate with my intentions.
I did get some pretty lousy head for a rather inexperienced gal one... way to much tooth action (ouch!)In reply to:
I don't use rubbers and there's far too much bad ju-ju going around.
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"ha, I knew it"
Let's see...where's that emoticon with the rolling eyes? :stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye:
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LOL...famous last hopes.
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So you protect yourself from STIs and HIV, but what happens if she gets pregnant? Will you do the honourable thing and marry her?
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LOL...I'm already married to her!
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Ah, I see... my mistake. I checked your bio but it didn't say.
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Now you know.
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Indeed I do.
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> I have (turned it down) before, and I certainly will again...it's inevitable these days.
Is a divorce in the works?
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No...but it's been my experience (as I've been married before) that girls who wouldn't look at you twice while single, come out of the woodwork once you get married. Just seems to work that way.
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It's heartening to see a married guy with the moxie to tell women who are hitting on him to take a hike. I wonder how that relates to the original poster, though, who seems to be playing the field.
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I was a totally faithful hubby myself. Not even a hand-job from a stripper.The unusual thing is that I travel a lot for work wich makes me an ever rarer breed of man.
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Women cheat as much as men do. It may not necessarily be for the same reasons, but it's the same result. Supposedly have the married men (in the U.S., anyway) cheat on their spouses, which means that half don't.