I decided to stop the oral things going on with me and my bf because it didnt feel right n e more in my head that is my view on myself you know reputation. But i cant help but feel he's a lil disappointed and maybe he wont love me as much and possibly leave me but i didnt stop the fondling down there. However it seems he still feels kinda disappointed about it like he lost something should i just tell him nevermind and keep doing the oral thing...
Of course he's disappointed, but for any sex act to be right you both need to be comfortable with it, and if you're not comfortable with it you shouldn't do it. If he left you over that he wouldn't be worth staying with.
Refusing to do something you're not comfortable with certainly dosent make you a failing girlfriend either. Just one thing though, you said "you know reputation" when discussing why you dont give oral anymore. Does that mean you are not doing this anymore because of other peoples perceptions of you? If so I'd say do what feels right for you and to hell with what anyone else thinks. Anyway, how are other people supposed to know what's going on privatly between you and your boyfriend? If you think he's the sort to go around blabbing maybe you should consider being with somebody more trustworthy?
Sex is about mutual pleasure. No one should do something they are unhappy or uncomfortable with.
Why not explore other ways to please him, do things that turn you both on, perhaps he will realize that not getting head isn't the end of the world.
You are concerned that he will love you less if you don't give head. If he really does love you, he will understand and won't expect you to do something you don't like.
Maybe discuss it with him, just tell him your reasons for not doing it, talk about other ways you can please each other. Communication is very important.
Eh, you're meant to respond to the original poster! If my boyfriend read that he'd be wondering where my problem with oral had suddenly sprung from, ha ha!