Hi all. I haven't posted here in a while. Actually, my last post was back in early August after I dumped my ex for cheating. Since then I've been on several dates. Of course nothing's worked out. And the worst part is I resent the whole process a little more each time. For example, last Saturday night I was invited by this cute dj to hang out at a club downtown. We were gonna meet up around 8. I talked to her maybe an hour before leaving, so it was a done deal. I went and was standing outside the place for about 20 minutes on the verge of a nervous breakdown or panic attack. I dunno, but being surrounded by all these college kids and the noise got me so pissed off about everything I felt like I'd explode. So I walked away, got back in my car, and drove around for a few hours until coming home. Never even saw her.We didn't talk again until Wednesday, and tonight I may or may not be going over to watch movies with her and possibly some of her friends. It depends on her, because I'm not gonna let myself get psyched out.The past few months have sucked. Friends are back in school or gone. All I've got is work and working out every night until I can't feel anything else but exhausted. It hurts realizing I will more than likely spend another holiday season and birthday alone. My family isn't close and stopped doing that stuff almost a decade ago. I really want to spill my guts to this girl, get a long hug, and feel ok again. But I'd probably just scare her away.
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Feeling alone
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hugs honey it sounds like not only r u missing a happy relationship but also some good friends. it really sucks wen ur having a shit time n u have noone to look out for u n comfort u. shoot me a pm if u want iv been/am in a similar situation
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Thanks, I might take you up on that later. I just talked with this girl and I'm not seeing her tonight and probably not at all this weekend because of her work. Now I'm feeling just that much more depressed and want to watch some tv, eat dinner, then fall asleep and not wake up until March. heh.
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yea ya gotta hate that. my problem is that i got here in january n i suck at meeting people n its difficult to get out.so with no bf n i left my friends i get/got down heapshugsthats no good,coincentaly enuf im not working at all this weekend u would b better off hanging out with me take care more hugs
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Thanks man. I only stop by a club or bar maybe twice a year tops. And I always hate it. Since I'm a college grad with a full time job as well as being an artist, it's rare that I'm around groups of people with common experiences or anything. Most of the women I've met were by accident while doing my own thing by myself. At a museum, walking around town, shopping, etc.I stopped drinking a couple years ago, so I don't go to bars. And that's what everyone my age does. It's real tempting sometimes. Not surprisingly, over half the women I've gone out with were several years older than me and much more mature. But they were always destined to fail. I figure in 10 years I might find a good woman.Things will probably get better eventually. I've been trying hard keeping myself together and meeting new people. But dammit, maintaining my drive is gettin so hard lately. Nights and weekends are the worst. Working out to get rid of the stress is great. On the bright side I'm in better shape than I've most likely been in my life, ha.