Put out or get out :(

  • Well I feel kinda dissapointed right now. For about 3 weeks now I've been calling this girl up and taken her places, we seem to really get along, and we share alot of interests. But today she just turned everything upside down.

    For a while now she's been telling me "we need to hang out" so it seemed like maybe she was intersted in me. I called her up today and took her out on the town. We drove around, drank a little and took lots of pictures. Then while I was driving around she starts talking to some guy on the phone, at first I thought it was just a friend, but then she said "Yes I want to be with you". I was a wee bit crushed at that point, I just wanted to take her home and not have to look at her.

    I can't see myself continuing to hang out with her, sense our wants and needs seem to conflict. I'm thinking about just cutting her out of my life, atleast a little.

  • Have you been intimate with her in even the least little way? Has she given you any reason to believe she wants to be anything other than friends? If not, this might just be a case of crossed wires.. She certainly wasnt trying to hide anything from you if she was saying that on the phone to some guy while you were sitting beside her.

  • The only sign's she gave me, was the fact that she seemed to want me around all the time. She would come over to my house, call me up, leave me myspace comments, and ask me to come with her places.

  • So after those weeks you never told her that you were interested in her as more than just friends?

    Either she's not interested, or she doesn't think you are. Only she can answer that question. How long were you planning to continue just hanging out?

    <i>Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.</i> -- MLK


  • In that case I think you should be honest with her. There is the possibility, and this has just struck me, that she could have been playing some kind of cruel little game to see if it bothered you, in other words, to figure out if you are interested in her.

    Perhaps she is in some confusion about that as you have spent all this time together and nothing intimate has happened. Personally I dont hang around, if I like a bloke I've no problem being the first one to move in for a kiss, but a lot of females are not like that and she may have been waiting for you to make your move all these weeks.

    Just tell her you're interested in being more than friends, and if things do go in that direction make it clear there's no room for other blokes to be calling her up on the phone!

  • By the way, I forgot to add that her seeming to want you around all the time is a pretty good sign!

  • Well I don't think thats the case, because I heard her mention his name, and it just so happens that there is a person on her myspace with that same name, and he's on her top 8. I checked out his page and he's like 22, she's 17, if she is really going out with this guy, I will be disgusted and just stop talking to her completely.

    My ex girlfiend (16) got with a 20 year old guy after we broke up, and he just used her for sex. I find that revulting, and idiotic. Right now I'm pretty angry, because I know what this guy is after, and it seems like she's going to get pretty hurt in the longrun.

  • Would you consider telling her how you feel about her? Or have you decided to let it go?

  • I don't have any strong feelings toward her, I just felt as though she liked me, and I thought I would pursue her as a possible girlfriend.

    I'm going to sort of act strange towards her, and wait untill she initiates "friend" talk, at which point I will tell her that I felt that I was led on, and I was hoping for something that might not have been there. Well atleast thats my take on things.

  • In reply to:

    I'm going to sort of act strange towards her, and wait untill she initiates "friend" talk

    This passive agressive behavior is what got you stuck in the first place... some good may come out of it, but I doubt it.

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