my gf says that she hasnt been in love with me for a while. she doenst know why, so she needs me to move out for a month so she can think about it. during this temporary breakup, she says that she might start dating again. i know that because im so hurt that im gonna hang on to see if she changes her mind, but if she doesnt im just gonna get hurt even more. ive asked her if she is just doing this to get rid of me, and she says that shes being honest about just needing time to think. she is someone who i want to spend the rest of my life with and i cant imagine living without her. what advice can you give me?
It's not an easy thing to handle, but it is manageble. What you really need to do is occupy your time with something else.
When you've got deep-rooted feelings for someone, it's almost like developing a habit or addiction (and I'm not saying it's bad or what- maybe you might be in love). Whenever you're trying to get over a habit, the thing you need to do is slowly replace that habit with a new habit- say a hobby or activity.
This doesn't mean you're saying good-bye to her, but rather you're taking your mind off her, and putting it on you. The key thing is keeping your mind occupied.
"There is no glory on this path, but there is HONOR."
we had a talk and i helped her find some of the answers as to why she's doing this. she says that she is young (20) and she doesnt know herself yet and that she is unhappy and she doesnt know why. she says that she needs to be single why she tries to find these answers. shes not looking to date or have sex with other people, but if it happens, it happens. she says that she needs to experience single life before settling down. i really dont think she can find these answers on her own because she doesnt know what questions to ask herself. i told her that she needs to consult her family cause no one knows her better than they. she told me that we are going to get back together because she does still love me and she does want to spend the rest of her life with me, but she just needs time to get some questions answered, and she needs at least a month.
deep down i really dont think she knows what shes doing or what shes looking for but i know why shes doing this. i felt like i was tied down too early for the first half of our relationship, and now shes feeling that too. its freaking her out, because she thinks that she never got to experience the single life after highschool and after moving out of her parents house. she thinks shes missing out on something by being tied down to someone that she already knows she wants to marry. but, i will do anything to keep this relationship together, so ill do what she asks and "just give her some time alone to find her answers". she wants to get back together and im gonna hold her to that.
She can't find the answers on her own because she doesn't know what questions to ask? That doesn't make any sense. She's young, she's 20, she shouldn't have to be tied down. This is her time to experiment and live life, she doesn't need to know what questions to ask, etc.
~*~Smile, it's the second best thing you can do with your mouth.~*~