Well, it's our holiday break at school, and a bunch of my friends were all planning on getting together. I organized it, but a lot of them bailed at the last minute, so it got cancelled. I threw together a movie with a 2 friends, but I don't even want to go. I don't really like going out places in small groups of people, the problem goes back about a year.I used to be a "social butterfly" so to speak. I'd do something with anybody at any chance. I enjoyed being around people, and people enjoyed being around me. But then last year, something that I had never experienced happened. I was out getting some food with a few of my close friends, when all of a sudden, 2 guys began randomly threatening us. Of course, this didn't phase me. I just casually ignored it, and if I did say something, I tried to be polite and not an ignorant person that would make them upset. Well, after we finished our food we left the restaurant, and this is when the trouble began. The 2 men followed us out, and attempted to rob us. When they asked for our stuff I said "no". 2 of my friends had already gotten on the bus, but I missed it. So it was 2 on 2. They were probably 18-21 years of age. We were only 14 at the time. So, then things got violent. The 2 men assaulted my friend and I. It was the middle of the afternoon. After I went down they took down my friend and started kicking him. I retreated to the restaurant and yelled for help. To my surprise, nobody there cared that we were getting mugged outside. I went back, and they both had taken off, leaving my friend with a broken nose, and me with a black eye, and bruised body. We then went and filed a police report. The first few months after that, I didn't go out anywhere. I went to school, I came home. I'd usually go to my friends which was only a block away, no big deal. But if we were going anywhere that I had to make an effort to go to (walking a far distance, busing, getting a ride) I politely declined the invitation claiming I had other plans so that nobody would get suspicious that I was afraid to go out. Eventually I started going out more and more. I'd go to a school play, the mall, the movies. All of this with at least a few friends that I felt safe around. But whenever I went out, I had a weird feeling in my stomach...like something was going to go wrong. I try and shake it off and act like everything is normal...I guess I just worry too much. My friends sometimes get mad at me now when I don't go out with them. I tried to cancel our movie, but she just said to come if I wanted, and I know if I don't, she'll be mad. But it's just 3 of us, and I dunno, we just look like easy pickings I guess to anyone that would want to harm us or anything.Since the incident (I'm officially calling it that now), I just am nervous to go out in small groups, and a lot more comfortable with a group of 7 or so of us. It just makes me feel safer. Now I know that the odds of that happening again aren't that high, but I'm still nervous about it. Like I said it's been about a year now, and it's just becoming a nuicince (sp?). I don't want to see anyone about the problem, it'd just make me feel even more weird about it. I don't talk about it with my mom, because she has enough on her plate since my dad passed away.I guess I just came here for some advice on the situation. How I can feel comfortable when I'm in public once again. I'm a pretty confident person, and I don't mind taking risks when I'm around people (showing my personality etc), and I just want to get back to being a people person again. If anyone can just try to help me with this problem, I'd be very grateful, and thanks to anyone willing to help me. If you read all of that, I'm sorry for it being so long.
Going out...not my thing.
Hey there, I understand how you feel. My first suggestion is go see that movie. The only way to brake your fear is to push the boundaries. If you can do that gradually then thats cool, but sometimes we've got to take the plunge. Think about all the times you went out and WERENT attacked. The chance of an attack is slim. What happened to you was sure nasty, but no reason why it has to happen again. Its alright to keep your wits about you and be wary in areas you identify as dangerous, but you cant let it rule your life. I'm sure with time and as little self-discipline you can overcome this. Its like when your a kid and take the stabalisers off for the first time, its damn scary but once you've done it once or twice you no longer think about it.Best of luck mate, I hope I was any help atall.
Yeah, so I went to see the movie, and had an amazing time. If you have the chance, I'd say go and see "The Prestige". I had such a good time in fact that I'm already trying to plan on going to another movie since some of my friends missed out. Thank you for your advice, I like your thoughts on my situation and think that is really helpful. I'm going to do things that will push me out of my comfort zone, and help me become more social again. Thank you