I'm new to my school and I'm having the worst time fitting in. I know a few kids who I thought were my friends earlier in the year but now they completely ignore me. I'm getting bullied by some other kids who I could probably take in a fight but the thing is, I already got suspended this year for fighting because I snapped. The kid was younger than me so that only added to the list of things to make fun of me about.
The kids in my grade who bully me were making fun of how I walk, talk, and act. Everyone thinks I'm gay even though I'm not. They make fun of the way I wear my clothes and everyone ignores me (even my teachers). I usually have nowhere to sit at lunch because everyone says that seats are taken even though no one is sitting there yet. I try to defend myself but its too overwhelming. One more fight and I WILL get expelled.
I'm sick of this and I really just wanna leave this new town and go kill myself. I'm sick of trying to fit in and trying to stand up for myself. I want to just finish middle school and high school and go to college and get on with my life, but this is holding me back. I already noticed my grades slipping and me struggling with focusing on my homework since I fear going to school every damn day. I faked sick before out of not wanting to face the people at school. I used to enjoy school but now I hate it and no it's not because of homework and tests.
Anyone that can help me deal with this would be great. Oh and going to a teacher to snitch isn't going to help my case!