I have phimosis, an overly tight foreskin and am unable of having sex until my circumcisions which the doctars said would at earliest be at the end of june but possibly in middle of july.I discovered my sexual inabilities about two years ago but wasted alot of time putting off organising a circumcision cos I was nervous about it. I have avoided sexual contact all this time. I did have some distressing encounters with young girls back when I was in school but have stayed away from it since. Girls find me attractive, possibly because I never make an effort to pull them (one theory of mine anyway) but I just shrug it off for the most part, lie about my singularity and the like (used to say I just wasnt ready for sex but thats sounding less believable now I'm 18).The difference for me this time is I really like this girl and I am reasonably close to my circumcision (albeit lacking a date for it). The most frustrating thing is this girl told me she loves me! Thats only happened once before! Shes a bit young mind so I take it with a pinch of salt. I dont love her, but I do think about her alot and can imagine myself really loving her in time, and I like imagining that. She first came onto me a while ago but was able to shrug it off, but just today she came at me expressing the feeling I've known shes been feeling for a while. She had to go just as I was considering telling her my secret, that I have a fucked up foreskin and am incapable of sex. That might seem like an easy thing to accept in the short-term to many on this board but we dont live in a patient society and this girl is younger than most I am interested in (shes 16 in two months). Well we said we'd talk again real soon, and I am gunna have to tell her something, but I am shit scared! Shes mature for her age (else I wouldnt even bother giving her a second thought) but I am still worried how she would take it if I told her the truth. I had always thought that maybe I could keep her at arms length until after my operations and then I would be able to make a move on her. Theres noone I can turn to about this, noone knows about my foreskin! Even for a mature girl I'm worried she will be put off by what I tell her, just because of the nature of the society we live in, I wouldnt blame her for losing interest in me. Whats the best way of phrasing what I have to say? I dont know how to explain that we have to wait for anything physical. At best I'd rather use some kind of delaying tactic til after my operation though thats not really fair on her anymore and I cant just put her on pause like a dvd. I'm damn worried now!
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Girl told me she loves me but I've got phimosis!
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If she thinks something as trivial and short-term as that is a reason not to like you, then obviously she's not mature enough for sex anyways. And have there even been any thoughts about having sex? If you aren't even in a relationship right now, why would she need to know whether you're capable of sex currently? Shouldn't it be a longer relationship than that before that thought comes up? If she's not turning sixteen till two months from now, which is when you'll have had the circumcision, I don't think there's much to worry about for now. Also, if you were to tell her, it might cause you to come across as only wanting a relationship for sex. I'd only mention it if it came up before you have had your circumcision.
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I didn't go back and read your contributions (waaaay too many and I can only see the last four pages anyway), but why not stretch the skin? Have you tried? And so on.
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Hi Straping, to you it seems a horrible dark secret, but it isn't really. "I have to tell you that I have an over-tight foreskin, so there'll be no sex until I get it fixed in July" is not something shameful to say, and I can't see that it would put any girl off.I think the fact that your feelings for her aren't as strong as hers are for you is more cause for caution than your phimosis.
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Just tell her the truth. If she really loves you, she'll accept it.
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I didn't bother reading all of your post sorry, but if you think you can't have sex because you have phimosis you're mistaken.I had much sex even with pinhole phimosis. Just put a condom on and way ya go. Also like me, you'll probably be a better first time lover than most as you'll take longer to get off (a result of having an extra layer between your corona and the vagina.All is not lost! And try stretching dude. I don't care how tight your foreskin is, it is do-able!edit I just read the rest of your post - If she loves you, she won't care at all that you have phimosis. She probably has a hang up about her body too, it may give her the confidence to tell you if you tell her.