Since you can't be a 100% sure if someone has an STD or not, and you can't be a 100% safe even if you use a condom, what is the responsible way to deal with these matters? What do you wise people think about premarital sex?
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What is the responsible way?
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Each person needs to make his or her own decisions on things like premarital sex. There's no doubt that in practice, the majority of people don't wait until marriage.
Concerning risks, everything we do in life has some risk, so complete avoidance of risk is neither reasonable nor desirable. Again, it's a decision everyone needs to make themselves. I feel that on average and in general (not necessarily talking about sex, but life in general), teens tend to take too much risk, and old people too little.
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Ask, if you can trust them (which, in my opinion you need to be able to trust those you sleep with, or you shouldn't be sleeping with them. I knew a guy who took me on a date once, that actually brought up when I get my last STD check (that completely put me off, and I never saw him again). But definitely talking, and communication. Some people share "Rosters" Before they have sex, that way you know how many people they've slept with, and they you.
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Yes, you can be sure if someone has an STD or not. Simply ask for a test. If you're currently with someone who's had sex before and you're concern about it, kindly ask the person to take one. People seem more comfortable having sex instead of talking about it. It's about communication and trust, like Java said.True, condoms alone aren't 100% foolproof. But you can reduce the risk of pregnancy even more with hormonal birth control. If you're still unsure about that, the only "responsible" way to deal with this is abstinence.In general, I'm a believer of "waiting for the right one". So, I guess that people who wait all the way until marriage would fit under that. But having sex, before or after marriage, is a personal choice.
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Thank you for your replies. Even if you trust someone it doesn't help if the person doesn't know whether or not he/she has an STD or not. So, do you really think it's reasonable to ask someone to take a test even if you trust the person?
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Yes, I believe so. That's what I did.
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I don't think it's likely for me to have a meaningful and physically romantic relationship. I've realized that I'm too afraid of too many diseases. I don't think it's possible for me to even kiss without thinking about herpes or mononucleosis or something else. I know they are usually not that dangerous, but they are often at a minimum inconvenient, and I'd prefer not having to experience them. I guess sometimes it would just be better without knowing about some diseases. I don't want to have to think about these things much. I don't think it's normal to worry about kissing, is it?
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no...it's not generally normal to worry about kissing, or sex if you take the proper measures.