Broke up after 2 yrs..pushed me away!.

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ok well pretty much i was going out w. my bf for two years and just recently broke up..4th of july :S.. we were in love! he's 20 and im 18!..yes maybe it was a little too soon now that i look back... but pretty much well..not gona go into detail..but throughout the months he was unintentionally pushing me away w. being so over protective and that would cause fight and it came to a point 3 weeks ago where i just had enough and i finally told him that..but i needed space like big time.. so 2 weeks went by..and i felt like i wanted out, he said he would change but i believe if we stay friends is better. untill a couple of weeks ago.. n in those few months he has lost my love.. so basically ..whn we said i love u..it meant nothing.. n he just didnt show it properly... but now..he knows his mistakes wants another chnace...but i dont love him!!!!!..... but i just cudnt tell him tht!! :"( untill july 4th i wake up at 11 still half a sleep n i recieved a a text saying how he couldnt handle the break and he was going crazy n that was the last note just to say goodbye becuase it would be off that way. well i was freaking i tried calling him but nothing finally after like 20 min i got a msg sayin leave me alone..so i knew he was "okay". but i called him and in the end i told him.. i needed to be single,unattached and maybe if in the future were still single something may happen but for now it wasn't going to work.. oh ye..i have to add that he lives in a diff city from me.. and my parents dont approve..even though hes the pastors son and we've known each others family for 5 years...:s but as soon as they figured out we were seein each other they stopped goin to the church in toronto.. and its a persian church ...... but becuase of my relationship we stopped going there.. but even w. all that he still stuck by...he would come visit me on my spares... when i visited my cuzins in toronto he would come by.. he got me a cell phone so we could be in contact and payed everything..now off coarse i have to pay him $300.. need a job 1st :S.. but ye like i was thinking literally aswell...im starting university and its right beside my house..so its going to be so much harder for us to see each other.. and it would be even harder if my parents didnt approve..and im not the type of girl that gets alot of freedom! unfortunately..but thats another topic....so thats a lil glimps of our relationship..now that we broke up..welll i should say .. on our 2 week "break"i became friends with this guy and it was as if we knew each other for years!! like we talked for hour the 1st convo.. n that rarely happens.. So throughout these 2 weeks we got to know each other better and he already knew bout my relationship and from the beginning he would always be like “it sux that u have a bf” but he would never say anything like break up w. the guy or something like that...he always be a nice guy! and like b4 i knew the guy i kinda he was the type of guy that didnt give a f*K. but i completely miss judged and i told him that.. but ye anyways.. we hung out during those 2 weeks..always like secretly cuz my parents.. kinda pathetic..he would come chill at like 8-1am when parents were working..so when i finally broke up w. my bf.. he came over one night. we watched a movie everything was cool.. the 2nd night.. he came.. knowin by now that i kinda feel something for him..cuz i spilled the beans when i was drinking :S.. he was like close ur eyes n hold my hands..so i did..n he kinda pulled me closer to him... n we made out.. but then it kinda turned into rubbing.... 3rd night same thing.. :S..i kno i just came out of a relationship!!!..but it in my situation it felt like months..and even that... i have never fooled around w. " A FRIEND" n i told him that i was listen im the type of girl that only does that stuff w. my bf.. he understood that but becuase he has been screwed over b4 he doesnt want to rush into anything and becuase i just broke up i shouldnt anything either right!!... well see thats the thing we dont wana rush but we kinda already did..sexually...like we both have feelings for each other and were willing to wait.. but when it comes to the whole fooling around thing like i hate the title friends w. benefits..cuz its not like that!.but we kinda still want to.... ahh i dno what to do!!... i feel horrible for these feelings.................oh but then listen to this... i was in contact w. my ..ex..this is pretty much the convo..he said.. And plus the other main reason why I don’t think it will work out ..and y I didn’t even want a friendship as well cus I kinda have someone new in my life… and like knowing him.. this was all a shock to him so it was like hes def besing..so i told him that ..n he said..excuse me full of bs..you think im lying about another girl..you really think im that low… I was in love w. u.. and this girl came and was someone I could lean on when u left n were cold w. me 4 2 weeksS…ur just mad..w.e at least I can take her out.. Whenever I want w.o begging her fucking mom 4 2 yrs. Let me tell u one thing.. W. ur moms att..towards ur future and how she wants to raise u .. no man will stay and fight for you.. No man.. U cant go out..cant talk on the phone.. And eventually will do things behind her back.and both u r mom wil get hurt badly!.............like i already kno all that y do u have to rub it in my face..i told him that u dont need to be low..just for tellin me that he was.. and that even if i was seeing someone and i wasn;t going to say if i am but i would never tell him becuase i know it would hurt him more..like when we broke up...we were so cool on the phone in the end.. were like sure we'll try being friends..then i get a msg like that.... i dno...what to do..what do u all think about that???????/

I had trouble reading all of that too.. Too much information...If you have lost your feelings for the first guy then it's time to move on.... The past is the past.

sorry i wrote all this like this w.o gettin ne sleep from bawling...... i didnt really care bout grammer or spelling or w.e i just wanted some help

Originally Posted By: Gizellei didnt really care bout grammer or spelling or w.e i just wanted some help You may not care but we do because it makes it easier for us to understand your problem. So next time, please take that into consideration.I was trying to read what you said but it's just too much. You keep using that "internet chat" type of writting, no paragraphs, no puncuation, and you added too much unnecessary information. However, I think I got most of what you said, so I'll try to help.First you said this in the beginning... Originally Posted By: gizy23it came to a point 3 weeks ago where i just had enough and i finally told him that..but i needed space like big time.. so 2 weeks went by..and i felt like i wanted out...in those few months he has lost my love.. so basically ..whn we said i love u..it meant nothing...but i dont love him!!!!!...i needed to be single,unattached and maybe if in the future were still single something may happen but for now it wasn't going to workOkay, fine. Then you said... Originally Posted By: gizy23i became friends with this guy and it was as if we knew each other for years!! ...So throughout these 2 weeks we got to know each other better and he already knew bout my relationship and from the beginning he would always be like “it sux that u have a bf”I don't understand. What boyfriend is he talking about? From what you said, you guys broke up. Originally Posted By: gizy23so when i finally broke up w. my bf..But you said you broke up with him in the beginning. I'm getting a bit lost here. I mean, you said so yourself; you didn't have any feelings for him, so what relationship are you talking about? Originally Posted By: gizy23n we made out.. but then it kinda turned into rubbing.... 3rd night same thing.. :S..i kno i just came out of a relationship!!!...i told him that i was listen im the type of girl that only does that stuff w. my bf.. he understood that but becuase he has been screwed over b4 he doesnt want to rush into anything and becuase i just broke up i shouldnt anything either right!!...Right, so what's your point here? Originally Posted By: gizy23well see thats the thing we dont wana rush but we kinda already did..sexually...like we both have feelings for each other and were willing to wait.. but when it comes to the whole fooling around thing like i hate the title friends w. benefits..cuz its not like that!.but we kinda still want to.... ahh i dno what to do!!You don't want to rush into a new relationship but you already fooled around. What's more confusing is what are you waiting for exactly? Originally Posted By: gizy23oh but then listen to this... i was in contact w. my ..ex..this is pretty much the convo..This is where I gave up. I have NO CLUE what you said in this paragraph.Anyway, after going through all this I'm still not exactly sure what your "problem" is. Are you wanting to be friends with your ex while having a relationship with this new guy?If that's the case, then you asking for trouble. Right now, your ex is still trying to get over the relationship you two had. A two year relationship isn't something you can get over in one night. You need to give him space and cut off contact with him.It isn't fair you're still talking with your ex while dating this new person. It's not fair to him because you are not giving him all your time and energy for the new relationship.Honey, you jumped into this new relationship too fast in my opinion. But if you do want to see where it goes, you need to lose the ex-boyfriend for good.

Wow. That's a lot to swallow at once. (I read it all.) I think if you don't have feelings for the first guy, to tell him its over, FIRMLY. He needs to find someone else, and come to realization that you don't want to be in a relationship with him anymore. ~The Best Thing For An Old Love Is A New Love~ Give this new guy a try. You shouldn't let the old guy tell you how to run your life. (The last paragraph convo) Don't be ashamed to fool around, but don't go too far. If you both truly have deep feelings for eachother, then start dating and see where it goes from there. And I sympathize for the bad grammar and stuff. It's hard to care about anything when you're upset. (especially spelling/grammar...ect) I hope this helps, and good luck!

im sorry guys.. and thank you emo_boy lol..see i kinda want to start a relationship with the new guy( we'll call him Bob for now lol and my ex. Bill lmao..) but yea Bob doesn't want to he just want's to be friends and get to know each other first. Which is understanable and i feel like i can't rush into a relationship especially after a week of being broken up. But like i said when it comes to fooling around, i dont want that to stop and it probably wont. But i still feel like shit when its all over with i know Bob is not my bf. And he is the first guy that i have fooled around with that is not my bf. so it feels werid. In addition we kind of promised each other not to fool around with others.But now, I kind of regret saying that now, cuz there's also this other guy (John), but nothing is going on between us, yet...(ahhh what am i getting myself into!!!) And about letting him Bill my ex move on, im trying to but he keeps texting me asking me to listen to certain songs like by eliiot yamin-ill wait for you" but then again he says hes also says he's seeing another girl. Sorry everyone for the headache im giving you! this is the only place i can only say w.e and actually get a response w.o people judging me. at leats people i know.. undertsand?!

Originally Posted By: Gizelle

this is the only place i can only say w.e and actually get a response w.o people judging me. at leats people i know.. undertsand?!
Honey, who's judging you? All we said that we can't understand your typing.

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but yea Bob doesn't want to he just want's to be friends and get to know each other first. Which is understanable and i feel like i can't rush into a relationship especially after a week of being broken up.
But like i said when it comes to fooling around, i dont want that to stop and it probably wont.
This is very confusing. If you don't want to rush into anything, then stop fooling around. You need to make up your mind here, honey.

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But now, I kind of regret saying that now, cuz there's also this other guy (John), but nothing is going on between us, yet...(ahhh what am i getting myself into!!!)
Don't get involve with another guy. PERIOD!

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And about letting him Bill my ex move on, im trying to but he keeps texting me asking me to listen to certain songs like by eliiot yamin-ill wait for you" but then again he says hes also says he's seeing another girl.
Stop talking to him. Did you read the post I made earlier?

Why did you create a new account?

because i forgot the password and i deleted my old email that i had it on.. i somehow got back to the email but its being retarted so i just made a new one.i know i shouldnt get involved with anyone, but i know if i dont keep myself busy ill go crazy. exactly same reason why my ex is seeing someone .. i dont blame him. this is so hard!oh and when i said judging i meant as in looking down upon me for what im doing. but here i dont know anyone personally so its all good i guess. :s

Originally Posted By: Gizellei know i shouldnt get involved with anyone, but i know if i dont keep myself busy ill go crazy.Then find a hobby.Honestly, you don't seem to be ready to be with anyone at the moment. You got off from a two year relationship and it sounds like you need more than a week to get fully over it. You need to give yourself time to put the past behind you and have yourself completely ready for the next relationship.I understand you are going through a lot of emotions but that's why you need to give yourself some you time and a break from being involve with anyone.

because i forgot the password and i deleted my old email that i had it on.. i somehow got back to the email but its being retarted so i just made a new one. OK. I merged your old account into this new one. The old one no longer exists.

So, wait a minute here...didn't you post on a different topic that you and your X just had anal sex? If so, then the first part of getting over him is to not engage in these activities with him anymore, and sticking to your guns. If I misunderstood, I apologize.

uh no not my ex... bill.. the new guy.. bob :S:S:S: i kno what your all thinking ahhh:S