Originally Posted By: MrZEDO
I mean, saying that just because someone watches a little tiny bit of porn they are going to have unprotected sex and get pregnant is ridiculously extreme.
Who said that? Are you making up more BS?
Porn addiction
Originally Posted By: MrZEDO
I mean, saying that just because someone watches a little tiny bit of porn they are going to have unprotected sex and get pregnant is ridiculously extreme.
Who said that? Are you making up more BS?
Originally Posted By: HelmsmaNNext thing you know she'll be posting about how she had unprotected sex, is pregnant and needs "help". There you go. Maybe you should look through the whole thread before you go spiting insults. Alright, now that is the last thing I am going to say in this thread. I just had to defend myself one last time.
Originally Posted By: MrZEDO Originally Posted By: HelmsmaNNext thing you know she'll be posting about how she had unprotected sex, is pregnant and needs "help". There you go. Maybe you should look through the whole thread before you go spiting insults.Alright, I'm woman enough to say I was wrong and I'm sorry. But I find it strange how you said what you said in your last post, but failed to bring up the proof of the "facts" you claimed or still haven't given the OP the advice she asked.Listen, we would love to see what you have to share. But if you're going to make claims like that, prepare some back up or prepare to get drilled bad.So next time, when you give your advice, don't make such crazy claims and actually give the help the OP asked for.
Originally Posted By: MrZEDO And you say it is "controlling your life"? What do you mean? Nothing you do for 0.6% of your time (I acually calculated that) can control your life. If I were you I would re-evaluate this whole thing, and think hard about whether or not I was blowing this way out of proportion.I hate to come off like I'm joining the fray of folks who are jumping your butt, but you are incredibly naive to think that something that's "done" only a couple hours a week can't control a big chunk of your life. Before I explain that, let me just say this...kindly and with respect. There are some of us here who are not only considerably older than you, but have had way too much experience with this stuff. We know what we're talking about. That's my position. I know sexual addiction personally. I've lived it for years. I'm not just pulling thoughts out of my butt and calling them facts. I'm telling you what has been my experience and what has been verified by research.Addictions control your life. That doesn't mean your are acting out 24/7. What it means is that the addiction affects all areas of your life, not just the time spent indulging. I may have only spent X hours indulging in addictive sexuality, but I also spent a lot of time dealing with screwed up relationships that were a result of the shame that came from my addiction. I spent time trying to reconcile my addicted self with my day-to-day self. You wouldn't believe the amount of time spent plotting and planning and pursuing the fix, and then the time that can be spent in recovery or cover up. The time I spent completely debilitated by my addiction...long after I'd turned off the computer and cleaned up. So don't tell me that something that is done a few hours a week can't control your life. I'm here to tell you that thing BECOMES your life.
Ok. I have to agree about the time issue. Its not HOW MUCH time you spend in it. Its how does the time you spend affect the rest of your life.
zedo
My thoughts are this. If she wants to quit then the curiosity be damned. She came to us for help and its our duty to give it to her. I don't care how "safe" you think it is. The simple fact is she wants to stop.
It doesn't matter how "safe" it is to watch television if someone says they want to stop for whatever reason we should help them stop. That being said.
I think porn is detrimental. Sure I looked at it when I was that age or younger. Know what its done even though I don't look at porn? I was never nearly as obsessed as other here claim to be. However, all it takes is one step forward. Porn. then its masturbation. then your having sex. Then your addicted to sex. I am still a virgin however, I assure you my restraint is wearing thin. And its never a good thing to have a desire to know what you want to do. to have thought about it for 5 years and still be restraining yourself. I would love to make it till marriage. However, it grates you. It sucks to have something put on a pedastool. You can't turn away from it you can't escape it.
I think my one saving grace has been that I'm too big of a loser to keep a girlfriend.
From what I've seen from you, that definitely is NOT your only saving grace.Be nice to yourself!
Easier said then done.
pretty much. If only I could delete and install new programs directly to myself xD.We could help alot of people out xD.deletes emotioninstalls c++
Originally Posted By: Nnypretty much. If only I could delete and install new programs directly to myself xD.We could help alot of people out xD.deletes emotioninstalls c++ I know you're kind of joking when you say this, but it really is the way it happens. You have to kind of "reprogram" your way of thinking about yourself. Uncover and get rid of cognitive distortions, negative self-talk, and automatic assumptions about yourself. You're right, it's not easy. And it's a process. But it's revolutionary if you can even just learn to do it a small bit.
I watch porn, I've watched it since I was 12, my friend has watched it since he was 11, another 13, another 9, shit i only know 2 people who don't. Everyoen is getting desensitized, sex isnt sacred, it's now pleasure. sure theres some kid's who will be screwed up, does it have to do with porn? maybe, maybe not. I'm not screwed up, I dont treat woman like objects, in fact ive been in a fist fight with a guy who was treating one of my friends like shit, I think it all depends on whos watching it, does this mean its morally right? Since when have morals ever stopped horny teenagers, I mean it's better me and my friends arent getting girls pregnant isnt it? The times may not be changing for the better, but it isnt going to go back 30 years, porns out there. in 20 years im probably going to do the same thing you parents/role models are doing about a subject like this, but your parents didn't want you to go looking at porn, did you? most likely alot of you did, its a full circle.
What part of she wants to quit so its our job to help her do you not understand??If she wants to quit breathing then we have a problem.For now she wants to quit looking at porn thats the only relevent issue.If I want to stop using the interweb altogether then who are you to question it?If I want to go live in an amish village its my right to go live in an amish village just like its her right to quit looking at porn should she choose to do so.END OF STORY.I am not taking a "this is detrimental" or "this is going to help her in the long run" stance. I am taking a "this is a 12 year old who feels she has a problem and we are going to help her" stance.So please. take all the "ITS OKAY TO DO THAT" bullshit somewhere else. Were she trying to stop breathing I would be inclined to point out the health benefits of breathing. However, this is an entirely different view.Got a problem with it? make a new post and we can discuss it there. However, this post is not about whether its detrimental or not. This post is about her wanting to stop. IF YOUR NOT HERE TO HELP HER GTFO
Only you can help yourself. Whether that be on your own, or seeking professional help, you have to come to the conclusion that this is not where you want to be in life, and make that decision to STOP. Don't be embarrassed to seek professional help, the have that for kids your age. You're allowed to buy condoms at the store at your age too, because it is a known fact kids your age are doing and watching crazy things. Just like Smokey the Bear used to say, "Only you can prevent forrest fires."
Originally Posted By: NnyIf she wants to quit breathing then we have a problem.That reminded me of the newest VGCats comic...
What if you were addicted to rape or murder and only did it once a year for an hour and a half? It'd be less than 0.01% of their time. Do you consider that an addiction? What if a person constantly obsesses about murder but never acts upon it? Is that an addiction.I don't want to say this, but you are far too ignorant to say anything like that. No offense.And we aren't the ones arguing with you. We simply mentioned points that you did not consider and you blew up right in our faces.
No point in replying honey. He's long gone. Time to move on now.
Since nobody is helping... Its only an addiction if you cant stop thinking about it, if its like one of those "oh i'm here and curious.." it dosnt hurt, now HARD CORE ISN'T FOR YOU! And Please remember you dont wanna grow up like those people. now, since you already discovered the curiousity satisfying power of porn, its hard to just STOP. Sadly, i know even though i've been off it for like 3 weeks lol. And for everybody else, she's curious, its not like a masturbation thing, curiosity may have killed the cat, but satisfaction allways brings him back