Over friendly workmate
Hello all, haven't been back here in a while - so hi to anyone that remembers me!
My reason for stopping by is to get some ideas how to deal with an over-friendly work mate.
The guy is a bit off somehow. He's not stupid or anything but lacks some social awareness and often his memory is pretty shocking. He is the boss's adopted son too.
I don't think he has too many friends - no offence to him but I can tell why - so I tried to be nice to him. Now he's texting and calling me quite often. I've been making up excuses (legitimately) to avoid having to do stuff with him but I felt bad and have agreed to go bowling with him on Sunday (even though I am still very busy).
He's a nice guy and all, but he can overly intrusive and doesn't take subtle hints. He quite clearly wants to be my friend (he said so himself) but I don't really have time for my current friends let alone someone I find a bit annoying.
I really don't want to hurt this guy's feeling but he's really getting on my nerves. Any suggestions?
Sounds like he hasn't been taught what's socially acceptable. It sounds like a tough one. If he's not the type to blow up when someone criticizes him, I would try and talk to him about his behavior. Try taking him out to lunch and make him feel relaxed. Also, don't come off as being annoyed. Just calmly explain how you feel.
He sounds like the type where he didn't have many friends when he was younger. Is he like this with any other co-workers?
I'm afraid you knew he'd be getting on your nerves when you decided to give him your number. I don't know what you could do to stop this unless you're frank with him and tell him ou're too tied up to hang out after work hours.
If someone is like that with me, I'm super cold. I know it's not nice, but like you said, some people cant take subtle hints. I act like the biggest preppy dude who cant be bothered. That's the only time I ever act like that, my circle of friends is like 200+ and I dont need new ones.
Sometimes...you just gotta act like a dick.
Because he IS your bosses' son (whether adopted or not), i hope this does not jeopardize your job.
Because he doesn't take hints, this is going to be hard.
You gotta back up.
You gotta put distance between you too.
By being nice to him, he's getting the hint that you consider him as a close friend, and much like him, has no social life.
Next time he wants to do something, just say, "No sorry. I can't".
If he asks why, just say, "Doesn't matter, I just can't".
If her persists anymore, just pray for a fire drill.