I've been having the most disturbing dream lately. For about two weeks now. Literally the same dream. I met this guy who is a friend of my other friend. And he's really nice and sweet and all. Almost perfect. But ever since the first day I met him I keep having the same dream of him raping me. I don't know why and I haven't talked to my friend about it or anyone at all since I figured it would go away. Plus I don't want her to think I just don't like him or something. But it's just a very bad dream and it gets worse and worse as the nights continue. The 4th day of my knowing him he told me I was a pretty and sweet girl and I was just like "aww thanks". And he asked me out but I kindly told him I'm not into relationships but we could be friends. And he was cool with it. And he's always nice to me but the deams or rather nightmares show a completely and entirely different side. I don't know what to do though and what's causing it. The only time I've ever had a dream about "being raped" was when I broke up with my first boyfriend but that actually had a good reason. This I don't know and I can't think of any techniques to get rid of it. And it's not just a blatant you fall asleep and it happens dream. Like I'll dream of being in school and I'll see him in the hallway and it will happen there. Or I'll be babysitting at home and he'll be hiding behind the couch. Or I'll order a pizza and he ends up being the pizza guy. Waste of a good pizza. I tried watching my favorite movies. Like Saturday I watched the Lord of the Rings before I went to bed. And that night I dreamt I was running with Legolas and Aragorn and beating up an orc and next thing you know he ended up being one of the elves. He's corrupted my dreams! But yeah... any words of advice?
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Dream Problem
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Maybe it's your brain telling you to stay away from this guy (for whatever reason) ?Dunno, just seems kinda weird that the first day you met him you dream about weird shit from him.
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yeah I know. At first I just thought it was weird. But it begins to feel more and more like a warning I guess. I see him everyday though and it's never a problem. I just don't know
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well i dont really know much of anything about psychology, but it could be a general fear projecting itself through him either because hes something of a stranger or just plain paranoia, or maybe its possible that the subconscious mind can pick up on things the waking mind cant and is projected in dreams as an actual warning that this guy could be dangerous somehow.
I know ive been warned of things in dreams and they ended up happening to some degree but the general message was the same. As to stopping them i wouldnt know, i mean maybe if you could find out a little about his past (and it was good) it might put your mind to rest but other than that i dont know what to tell you but i hope it gets resolved
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If you have any gut instincts go with them until you have reason to do otherwise.
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thanks guys. I guess I'll just try and get to know him a little better. but I'll keep my guard up
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well hopefully someone with a little (or a lot) more knowledge and experience chimes in and can provide some good advice
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Try listening to peaceful music maybe? Or maybe a dream catcher.Might at least give a placebo effect.
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Maybe the dream is highlighting the negative side of your decision not to date anyone? You see the bad side of dating, the drama and the young sex, and you feel that it outweighs the positive side even tho none of it is a guarantee. Then this guy comes along, a really nice guy who has shown absolutely no negative side to himself at all but you can't stop having these nightmares about him raping you.It seems a lot like either your mind is trying to remind you of the dangers of dating, or more likely (in my opinion), its highlighting your irrational fear of dating.Of course that's all only if you believe that dreams mean something. It could also be that you met this new guy and had this completely random and horrifying dream about him. The next day you were so disturbed by it that you kept thinking about it, it rarely really left your head so it was fresh in your mind the next night and you had the same dream. Then the following day you are really disturbed about having the dream twice! You actually fear the dream and can't stop thinking about it, you wonder if it'll happen again. And of course now you're thinking about more than ever so of course it happens again and this time its even worse! Now repeat this step for 2 weeks.But hey, what do I know! I don't remember any of my dreams!
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Quote:You see the bad side of dating, the drama and the young sex, and you feel that it outweighs the positive side even tho none of it is a guarantee.i was thinking about the same thing bob... lol i just didn't know how to say it. it is just ..i dk. Dreams are weird.. They can mean things (that we arn't aware of) and then they can mean absolutely nothing. LMAO last night i had a stupid dream. don't know why either. of all the people in it. LMAO charlie sheen was in it! LMAO i haven't seen any movies he's been in latley and haven't seen his comidy show in a while either. lol i did read th etitle Two and a Half Men tho when i was looking to see wut was on tv monday night. LMAO but yea..wtf is he doing in my dream? then i stomped my toe on some steps and woke up when i felt the cat... poor cat i kicked her off the bed. then i got up and picked her up and was telling her i was sorry and got back in bed and she went back to her spot and gave me a look... lol she was probly thinking keep those feet on ur side. LMAO......... little too much info huh
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Listen to eastern music such as meditative yoga music, or classical music right before bed, or actually try to go to sleep with this music in the backgroung.
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I agree with Dantek.Probably just you projecting some fear on him within your dreams. Doesn't necessarily mean you are afraid of him. Could just be that he triggered some dormant fear. So it pops up in your dreams. Think of it this way. In your dreams, he isn't him. He's the representation of that fear. Make sense?I think the trick in cases like this is not projecting your dreams onto the person. Don't let your feelings about the person in the dreams come out against the real person, if he hasn't done any of the things in real life.
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I have a good reason not to date though lol. I was so close to becoming a lesbian. I'm surprised I'm not. BUT, I'll take your advice. But I don't want to date him. I don't want to date anybody really and it's annoying to be asked out all the time. And I know some people may say things like "you're complaining too much" or that I'm being picky or something. But I'm just really not wanting that at this time. But I will try and get closer to him as a friend. I just hope he doesn't take it the wrong way.
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I don't think that you're complaining too much, but I do think that you're complaining about being asked out too much! Bitch! I'd love to be asked out all the time!
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Will you go out with me Bob?
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Will you go out with me Bob?
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Hey! then why don't you date the guys that ask me out lol.
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Life is TOUGH
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Yes! Yes to all!!Ahem, Abi? Why aren't you asking me out??
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Cause she prefers a real gentleman...like me!