Note: this isn't some emo cry for help lol, I'm generally a happy person.Anyways so I watched a movie with a friend last week and they were just friends. However sitting near girls (it was a boy/girl thing, only about 3 of us) I felt like I wanted to... I dont know.It's like, I just want like a companion kind of, not as much a girlfriend. Like a companion without almost any physical stuff.Just kind of 'holding each other' if you will on a couch while watching tv or something. Knowing someone likes me.Ehhh, I dont see where this is going.[/post]
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I feel almost, alone
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Companionship is very important for happiness, and ordinary friends may not be close enough. And the idea that someone likes you and likes to snuggle up to you is a very important part in any 'more than friends' relationship. You want the emotional part of having a girlfriend, and that's good. For most girls, that's the important part too. Don't feel that girlfriends are about sex - if girls knew how you felt, they would be falling over each other to be your girlfriend.So where is this going? Find a girl you like - perhaps one of the girls you were with, if they are unattached - and see if she'd like to go to another movie with just you.
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You make it sound easy, hehe.
I dont think girls would be falling ove each other :P I know it was an exaggeration, but I'm not gonna go around and be like, "Hey, you know -- when I get a girlfriend, I just want the emotional part the most. Just in case you were wondering."
And I'm pretty sure those girls didn't like me, and I'm pretty sure noone does (more than a friend 'like')
Yeah...
EDIT: But I know what you mean. Girls probably are used to guys staring at their breasts, and doing 'guy' stuff. Some girls probably would like a guy who didnt do that. But there are girls who like it, no? Theres a word out there somewhere for them...
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Uh... frivolous flirts?
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What? Frivulous flirts?You lost me.
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-"..There's a word out there somewhere for them..."
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He's answering your final comment: "But there are girls who like it, no? Theres a word out there somewhere for them..."I agree it's not as easy as the way I wrote it, but when someone thinks he/she is unattractive to everyone, that means that person's sense of self needs fixing. If you look around, you'll see ugly guys with girlfriends, you'll see guys with terrible personalities with girlfriends. There's no reason you can't, except your belief that you can't. Such beliefs tend to be self-fulfilling. Nothing ventured, nothing gained! You don't know that a girl isn't interested, until you've asked her and she has said so. Then you move onto the next one.
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wow...the few guys ive dated only wanted physical stuff. who ever you end up with will be a VERY lucky woman.
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So I should kind of take a stab in the dark and just ask someone?I know before you said that girls would like to have a guy who didnt want so much physical stuff. So if that's going to influence their opinion, how can I make it do that.I don't see how a girl would find that out is what I'm saying. And I dont want it to be some cocky trait to get a girlfriend.
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I felt the same you at the end of last year i was 19 and never had a gf or kissed a girl and i ended cryin my self 2 sleep and bangin my head against my bedroom wall wishin i was dead every night . I never wanted anything physical many cos they was just no point, all i wanted was some1 too talk too. I found some1 in the end but she in another country so its hard plus there are other problems but i wont get into that here. Just keep tryin i guess and you will find some1 im sure of it maybe girls like the whole emotinal think, but then i don't know much about girlssorry if i didn't help much
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That doesnt sound good.
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hmm stab in the dark eh......well maybe just make sure u like them first no point just asking cos it wont make u happy or i don't think it will. But if u find some1 u like and get on with go for it. Again im sorry if this doesn't help u much
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I think you take it in stages. Inviting someone to a movie or something like that without other friends is a halfway point to going out - it's not fully going out, but it gives you a chance to talk. (Go to a cafe or something after the movie.) You should be able to mention at some point in the discussion your philosophy about relationships. You could even choose the movie to help bring up the point - it will probably be one of those chick flicks all about a troubled relationship, rather than an action movie.
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Lol i hope it goes like clock work like u just said.
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Yea as {STAR} said, again, you make it sound pretty easy, hehe.
If I did ask this one person, most likely I would get some comments from people making fun of me and such. Not something I like too much :frowning: Anyway, I'm not really sure what to do at the moment.
I almost wish people were kind of pressuring me to do something, that way it wouldnt be as hard for myself?
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Don't worry about what other people say. It's none of their business. If you run your life according to other people's comments and urgings, you're not running your life. Make up your own mind, then do it.
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I know I shouldnt care but I do.People make it their own business and that's what's stopping me.EDIT: I also wouldn't want to screw up a friendship with this person. I dont think it would be an auto-no, but its risky.
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Dude you're a prize to be had. That's what you keep telling yourself. Any girl who you approach needs to understand that you approached them because they need their life filled with YOU not the other way around. If you just want companionship but almost none of the physical stuff, than I think many girls out there would be happy to have just that. Far too often girls are perceived as objects; having a guy that is truly interested in just the company is very rare. But like any rare artifact, very prized and very valuable. Suffice it to say, however you're probably not going to find a girl to just have a companionship with without being in a relationship vis a vis girlfriend/boyfriend situation. But like I stated earlier, you're the prize and the girl is lucky for you to want her. The inverse is not true.
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well beret man if that doesn't fill you with confidence i dunno what will, a SHINING review u got
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People make it their own business and that's what's stopping me.No one can make it their own business unless you let them.