im 19 and i have been in the marine corps for almost a year now and have began to question if i have developed a serious problem. I am in classes for my job and my mind always wonders, i think about different ways to beat the crap out of other students in my class or even fantasize about killing them. it lasts all day long and i have trouble keeping up in the class because of this. i also seem to hate everything that i used to love to do such as drive play video games and go to the gym. I snap on everyone for petty things. after class i just go to my room and lay in the dark because i dont want to ruin all of my relationships with friends. the only time i feel somewhat normal is when i go home to Vegas(about 220 miles away) once a month. im afraid to ask for help from a superior because they might not let me go home. any suggestions?
Welcome to A2A, oohrahcomm. From your description, it sounds a serious problem - it sounds like a bad reaction to stress. There should be a counsellor or psychologist you can talk to. The military have a lot of experience of the different ways people can react to stress, and they know it's not in their interests to ignore signs of a bad reaction, because in a combat situation that could have serious consequences.
You're doing the right thing by addressing your issue, now seek some internal counseling and explain your situation to your higher-ups. They have a LOT of experience with people like you in the military, they should know how to handle it appropriately.Obviously, you by yourself cannot achieve the goal of internal peace, but you can start doing the things you used to love. Let the professionals handle the rest.