I have always enjoyed school and learning and I always got good grades...until now. I'm 14, and it just seems like I don't have the ability to CONCENTRATE anymore! I used to be a fast reader and able to get through all my homework and reading with good concentration, but now my mind is always wandering. And it's always wandering to the same place! My dick!Don't misunderstand me, I love all the great feelings and sex stuff that came with puberty, but it's like it's taking over my thoughts all the time! And that's frustrating! I have my first girlfriend and we mess around but no actual sex yet, and it seems every time I try to study I start thinking about her, and then I get an erection and concentration goes to zero. So then I go and masturbate, but then I get tired and don't want to study. I don't think I'm abnormal, but in many ways life was a lot easier before my testicles started to take control over the rest of my body. I guess I can ask: Does it get any better? If I started having intercourse, would that help? Would that help me not be so horny all the time if I really "did it" with a girl once in a while instead of just jacking off every day?
Life was easier before puberty!
it does get better.
I'm a little bit older than you but I'm still going through the hell and heaven we know as puberty.
I get what is happening to you...it still happens to me,
but it gets better.
I still masturbate and I've never had full on sex. But it still has gotten better - a lot better. Right now its hitting you hard, but it lessens AND you get more control over yourself.
So, I guess all I can say is make a real effort to concentrate, if you get an erection - think of dead nuns, and if you really can't stop - then just masturbate and make yourself get back to work.
I hope that helps.
"I have a fine sense of the ridiculous, but no sense of humor."- Edward Albee
Yeah, I'm in college, and still have that problem.
To be honest, and I think a lot of guys agree, you learn not only to accept it, but enjoy it.
And, if you start having sex, it won't get better, it'll get worse because you'll miss having it.
On the flip side, it will give you a lot more to think about, and you'll learn to love it soon enough.
Again, welcome to ManHood. It only gets harder from here (pun intended)
Originally Posted By: ScottP14If I started having intercourse, would that help? Would that help me not be so horny all the time if I really "did it" with a girl once in a while instead of just jacking off every day? Absolutely not. Just try to gain control of your hormones and focus more on your studies.
No matter how gifted, you alone can not chang...
My hormones controlled me from age 13-16, sex was the only thing on my mind all the time, and i would space out in class all the time. Im now 17 and i have noticed my hormones have calmed down alot. I still think about sex but now its like, when it happens it happens, not like zomg i gotta sex now, like before.
Thanks, everybody! I really appreciate your help. It's just me and my mom and we live in an apartment. My mom caught my dad screwing somebody else a couple of years ago and that pretty well ended it for them. They got divorced and he moved away and I hardly ever see him. Lasy year my mom accidentally walked in on me while I was buck naked wanking on my bed, and now I know she's worried about me and my girlfriend and I think she thinks we're probably already having sex somewhere. She makes comments that "a boy's penis at your age can only get you into trouble", and stuff like that, and it makes me feel guilty because she's probably right. Being with my girlfirend is SO EXCITING. I really think I love her and we share so much together. I hope my mom never finds this or reads this, but my girlfirned and I have already been naked in my bed together after school. The absolute best is when she touches me or we masturbate each other and each of us has a climax. I so much want to put it inside her, but then again I don't because I think my mom is right. My penis CAN get me into a lot of trouble. (But usually when I'm masturbating alone, you know what I'm thinking about. Me and my girlfirend are having the best sex ever!!!)If my dad was around, I don't know if I could talk to him about this stuff or not. But it's nice being able to talk about it here, where I think people understand, both my age and older guys. Thanks again!
As for the girl, no clothes, mutual masturbation etc, etc..thing. You make sure, that if you all do break down and do the dirty, that you're using protection. 14 year old pregnancies don't go over very well....
As others on here have said, your hormones will calm down with age. What your going through now is just a stage that all must go through and sex is the "be all, end all", As time and your maturity progress you will find that your ability to focus on things other than sex will return. For now, all you can do is do your best to control your libido, and to the best of your ability not let it interfere with your studies... and wank away.
As for actual intercourse alleviating your inability to focus, that isn't going to work. Your arousal is product of your hormone level and that is not going to be effected, to any lasting extent, by engaging in sex. Your hormone level will only calm down as you mature.
With regard to the sexual activities you and your girlfriend are currently engaging in, a word of caution. Don't let yourselves get caught up in the moment. It's very, very, easy to be in the heat of passions embrace a throw caution to the wind and go to humpin'. If you think there's the slightest chance that is going to happen have a condom ready to go and know how to properly put it on and use it.
As a matter of fact go research that now. You don't want to be fumbling around with it your first time or far worse, blow your load and it have a rip in it, or have it slip off inside her. It's good idea to practise putting one on a few times. You don't want to be trying to figure it out and be losing wood when she's all lathered up and ready to go.
Whatever you do be careful. You damn sure don't want a baby before you even get out of high school.
There is no punishment. There is no reward. There are only consequences.
no mate, havign sex will NOT make it lessen or go away, trust me, all it will do is make you think about her more, and then you'll get bonners mroe often, and be able to concentrate less, its a cruel world eh? well it gets better with age, i am happy to say i have stopped gettign the random bonners, that used to irritate the shit outta me, well, every once and a while i get one, but not nearly as often as i did last year,that was hell
I remember one of my trips to venezuela as an adolescent, this real hot girl was trying to teach me to salsa dance, until she saw something "up" with me. Then she said something like, "You misbehaved" and that was the end of my lesson, but I had no control of my compass.
I just want to support OldFolks and suggest you practice with condoms now, and make sure you have some available. Some people might think that is helping break down your resolution not to have full sex, but such resolutions can break down in the heat of the moment without any help, and pregnancy would not be good. You can be adept at using condoms, and have them handy, and still resolve not to have sex.
THANKS EVERYONE SO MUCH!! I really appreciate what everyone has wrote! So many new things have happened to me in the last few weeks and it is exciting and scary at the same time. Now I have something else to ask. Three times now my girlfriend has put me in her mouth for a little while and then I finish myself off by hand while we are kissing. When I come like that it has got to be the absolute biggest rush I have ever had!!! But it is so strange that by a couple of minutes later I feel real awkward and sort of embarassed and maybe even guilty about what we are doing. All of a sudden she wants to cuddle with me and I feel like I just want to put my clothes back on. It's really a very awkward feeling! Every other time I'm with her I feel wonderful, but right after this absolute tremendous sex orgasim it's like I feel "yuck"! (Is sex like that???)
For us guys, after we cum the sex drive temporarily goes away, and we are left with a considerable let-down feeling as you describe. But women want to be cuddled, and it's our duty in gratitude to oblige them cheerfully.I saw a comedian once who was describing masturbation: "I'm a sex god! . . . I'm a sex god! . . .(pause) . . . I'm pathetic."
Originally Posted By: ScottP14but right after this absolute tremendous sex orgasim it's like I feel "yuck"! (Is sex like that???) Depends on who you're sleeping with, lol!
No matter how gifted, you alone can not chang...