Hi Guys, Just discovered this site today, and I'm really impressed with all the compassion everyone here has.OK, I wanna just ask you guys for some advice with a constant nagging problem I've been having. I'm 19 and the one and only girlfriend I've had was when I was 15. I'm a pretty sensetive guy and always rather snuggle up with my girl than go out to a club. So probably stemming from the fact that I haven't had a girlfriend in such a long friggen time, I'm getting a lot of feelings of inadequacy and unattractiveness. Also, when I was a baby, I fell down and smahed my mouth on something and had 12 teeth fall out. my parents got me these baby dentures (funny huh?) but I spat them out all the time. as a result I developed really hard gums and when my adult teeth came in, then came out crooked due to the tough gums. So, I've always had feeling of unatrctiveness due to my teeth, and when all my friends were dating in high school, I envied them, but I shrugged it off because I'd rather wait for a solid long-term relationshiop than a high school fling, but now, like 4 years later, I still haven't had a girlfriend or sex, and its really starting to get to me.I'm not sure if half this stuff even makes sense to you guys, I've been kinda rambling on, in fact, I don't even know what I'm looking for from you guys. I guess I just needed to unload this stuf.-Milo
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Age of Maturity?
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I'd love to get braces, unfortunatly neither me nor my parents can really afford them. damn things cost an arm and a leg. Yeah, I think your right too, I need to get the guts to ask someone out, but the problem with that is, I'm not gonna ask out a girl unless I get some signals from her first, which hasn't happened as of yet, so I wait... I dunno, aren't times changing? why does the guy have to ask the girl out?And who looks at teeth you say? I think a lot of people do, thats only speaking my humble opinion, and peobably exagerated by my parania about my own teeth.-Milo
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You're still young and you have plenty of time ahead of you. Love often comes when you're least expecting it. As for the braces, most places and insurance companies have/offer pretty cheap payment plans...as low as $50 a month for some.
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I know I'm still young, and thats exactly what I keep telling myself, thats what keeps me going. But tell me, isn't its a little awry that over the past 4 years, all the girls I've met or talked to at parties/bars/etc haven't shown any romantic interest in me what-so-ever. I mean, there has to be a reason for that right? thats why I always assumed in was my teeth. At what age do people really stop being vein and look at people hearts rather than their appereance?-Milo
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Vanity is present at all ages unfortunately. Like I said before if you're that worried over your teeth look into payment plans and options from your insurance company or orthodonist.
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Don't have dental insurance nor an orthodentist. and Amanda, I'm not really worried about my teeth too my personally. It just bugs me sometimes because its sets me aside from all my friends and soforth.Honestly, are good teeth and a nice smile important to woman??-Milo
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Let me start off with the Braces issue. I think before you can go around fixing thing you really need to love yourself first. If a girl won't except you bc of the way your teeth are they shes very fucked up and you don't need someone like that. If it really means that much to you there are ways to get the money to pay for them if money is the major issue. Put you can really put that off as long as there are no complications. I think you are probably a very shy guy, kinda worried about his looks so that may be where the inadequacy began but is not the complete cause, just sort of the thing to blame. You have to break out of ur shell if you want a girlfriend and it may take even more waiting and although u hate to here that is it true that love might occur when ur least noticing it. step back and just enjoy the time u have being 19.
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Your partially correct. I'm not really all that shy in my day to day life. But when it comes to woman, I have no experience, so I really have no idea exactly how to ask a girl out, or how to show a girl I'm interested. All the stuff most people learn in high school.
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u mean the stuff u think most ppl learn in high school. Even the most experience i doubt really know what they are doing. When you meet a girl just start talking, tell her a little about urself ask her some stuff about her. Smile when she talks and laugh at jokes. Maybe give her hugs and stuff and she'll catch on. Hopefully after that sometime u'll feel comfortable to ask her out.
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i just thought i'd chime in on the braces thing... i just got braces (i'm 24) and they had all sorts of payment plans, as low as like $50-$60 a month. these things have done wonders for my self confidence....also stu, to what you were saying about braces not being important, if your teeth are crooked it makes them more prone to decay because you can't reach all areas and they are difficult to clean. as for the depression you might want to go see a doctor or counselor about it to talk things over. don't let it go to far before you decide to treat it!
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or you could stop caring about women. that's what i did. last gf i had was a fag. women have problems with their emotions... they have them, they exspress them, they want you to do the same, they get moody and boo hoo like... the only real goal in your life should be having sex but telling the girl to fuck off at the end.
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I got my first girlfriend (now wife) when I was 21, nearly 22, when she got fed up with waiting for me to make the first move - so there's hope for all of us shy guys.
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not all girls are like that. you soundlike a really nice guy and girls would be stupid not to go for you. I'm a girl and i prefer the sensitive type, like you. the problem with you is the coinfidence thing. i'm sure there are plenty of girls around you who like you but you probably do't know it because you don't feel confident enough to have girls 'fancying' you. who cares about teeth? sure there are shallow ppl around who will judge on that. i have rwally thick hair and because of that i have had trouble with guys. you will find a girl who will like youfor who you are, i think you sound really nice. if you ever wanna chat more, PM me, if you join and make it official
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Huy Guys,
Just wanted to thank you for your time and effort, and let ya know I'll be stickin' around if you'll have me.
Ineligable, I love hearing stories like that, they keep that little ember of hope burning.Here's a quick question: I've thought about going to a doctor or somebody to talk about this, but I really don't know where to go, and I really don't want my mom or my friends involved....
About the braces thing, I'll have to check into it, but I'll be starting university soon and I don't know if I will have an extra 50$ a month, ya know how it is with students...
Alright, Gotta go to work soon, Catch everyone later
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Universities usually have free counselling available, that might be useful. Some even have relationship classes.
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Hey Guys, I have another question for all of you.
What are the subtle things that tell you a girl is interested in you? I mean woman can be pretty confusing (no offence pls), and sometimes I think a girl is interested, but at other times its like I don't exist, how the hell is a guy suppose to make heads or tails of anything...
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subtle tings? certain type of eye contact. unusual cuddling. yeah. i did that all last week.
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also when i they like laugh at you for no reason and make an effort to touch you . when you can tell they are showing off when your about. the way they look at you when your about and when your talking.
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Thanx guys ;(