Well, i came to this board when i think i was like 15....
The moderators and well known been here forever members...
I kinda, without even knowing ya'll, consider yall people i can talk to about anything on this earth, and i trust yall with this too
Ok, ima be straight up, ya'll prolly heard me complain that i was ugly 2 years ago, but i dont think i got into it much...but simply, my looks werent all that bad, cept i had a insanely wide nose...I'm a very skinny white guy btw, and i was born with a nose that just...looked deformed it was so wide. My nose was literally as wide as my mouth, and it wasn't just the
nostrils of my nose....the tip of my nose was the widest part.
People would make fun of me, it was hard to make freinds, and no one in school thought i was attractive...
And for my 17th birthday, i convinced my parents to take me to a plastic surgeon that could help my nose look "normal-sized"
My parents thought i was crazy at the idea, because they couldnt beleive their son wasn't the most handsome popular guy in school, but after begging, they gave in, and i had the procedure done.
The first few months after it, i was happy, i made new freinds, i was being happy for once, because my nose was normal looking, and i had nothing to hold me back from talking to people
Best thing, no one even noticed the change in me (prolly cuz no one even knew me) and i just told my best freind i had wreck and broke my nose and now it looks different, but i was getting new complements from everyone...
"nice clothes", "nice hair", and for once people noticed me for good looks
3 months passed, and before i say this, with "nose jobs", its up to a year before you see the "final" results, and it's appearance can change alot in the first year after you had it done, thats what the doctor said.
Well to my luck, after 3 months passed, my nose has changed and is once again "blobby Looking" (although not as big)
and looks awful compared to what it was about 2 months ago after the surgery
and once again, my confidence is deplenished...i no longer seem to get as many looks in school...and i just feel ugly again...
If you've ever watched a plastic surgery channel or show, you'll know that it isnt that rare for a nose job to turn out bad if done by a bad or inexperianced doctor, and its basically what happened to me. There's another doctor im talking to right now on the net, who specializes in "repairing" a nose job that went bad, but he says because of healing, it'll be up to a year before he could correct my nose, and this is my senior year, so i basically have no luck in gaining confidence to enjoy the last bit of school.
Thats why if youve read in the drug forum im trying to turn to drugs as a way to pass the time fuck im tearing up actually right now as im typing this
But the people who would reply to this saying plastic surgery is fake, ok when youve been tortured at life just because your really ugly and you have no chance of happyness, and one day your watchin tv, and some show comes on where someone who lived the same life as you turned to plastic surgery to make them look better, and they end up crying tears of joy before the shows over because how a simple surgery made their life so much better, you start to consider that it could help you too, and im living proof it helps. It helped me for the first coupld months after the procedure, but like all the doctors ive talked to have said, during the first year, there's always that "small" chance that over time the nose could possibly slowly heal wrong and take on a unwanting appearance, and thats what happend to me....
So just fuck off if you dont have anything nice to say
But 2 years ago, none of yall heard about my thought on my nose because i was so ashamed of actually wanting cosmetic surgery to change the way my nose looked, but after 2 years of thinking on it, and seeing how many people it's helped, i decided i wanted to go through with it....And no, nose jobs arent for just celebrities, and its actually so common, that chances are 1 person in your family, (meaning spread out family up to like sister's husband's mom's brother or something) has had one.
But yeah, nose jobs, most of them do turn out "great" to "good" to at least "better than what it was, and at least normal looking"....that's why im so upset that for once in my life i couldnt just have good luck for a change...
i mean bleh....sorry for the long post tho
Well, i came to this board when i think i was like 15....
Thank you for explaining this, someone young.
I usually feel that self-confidence, or lack of it, is something people bring to their bodies much more than they take from them, but you persuade me that is somewhat simplistic. I do suspect, though, that you were better-looking than you thought before the operation, and are better-looking now than you think.
I think you would benefit from some sort of counseling, I really think no one notices your nose as much as you do.
I also bet, all the friends that you were making while your nose was healing weren't because of your nose; I bet it was because of the confidence you portrayed while you thought you looked your best.
If you learn to carry that confidence, I bet your back to that happy guy again.
"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." -- Theodor Seuss Geisel <br /><br />
That's an excellent point, Pepsi!
Like well my old nose, im not trying to be racist here, i definatly don't think black people are ugly, but to be realistic, all races have different features, and those features look best on THEM, not another race...
And well my nose looked pretty much just like a nose you would see on a black woman..(usually largely wide and thick)
And I had the surgery to give me a nose that fit my race, cuz well im white, and white people usually have thin, straight, and pointier noses, and definatly for a white guy, its a must, cuz any white guy with a rounded fat button nose is pretty much gonna look weird....unless their a thick person all around, which im not.
And well my nose is SMALLER, but the rounded thick look of it is exactly the same....the first couple months it was more pointier and defined and even my mom agrees so. And my doctor said it would get even BETTER throughout the months. But its got worse. I even have pictures to prove it. (And my doctor says after a nose surgery, it will change slowly over time up till a year. But my nose changed from less defined and pointy, to rounded looking over the months)
To give a perfect example of the shape of my nose, look at a picture of Santa.
Its just hshdshd.
Just its hard to go through counsoling, and especially when a physical feature your trying to get over...its just, i didnt want a perfect nose, i knew i could never have that, but i just wanted a nose that was more "me" and fit my face, and race.
And you know....just about anything on the outside of you you can hide if you dont like it.
Big ears you can cover up with hair.
Ance = Makeup
Fat = Workout
Ugly hair = haircut
But just an ugly nose....its in the middle of the face and there's nothing you can do.
I'm bothered with enough on my body tho, i'm 5'4 and 17 years old
I'm ona the shortest guy seniors in my school.
I'm pale as fuck.
And my face besides my nose isnt all that good looking.
But i let NONE of that bother me.
Just my nose....i went through all the surgery...and i deserve for it to turn out right, and i would look sooo much better if it turned out a lil differently....and im just so dissapointed....
Quote:cuz well im white,
Are you sure? 100%????
Oh boy. Ok, you seem to have this idea of what everyone "should" look like. You say every race is different, but guess what: Every person is also different.
It's obvious that you hate the way your nose looks, but that attitude is exactly why you're not as popular or have as many friends as you'd like. Like other people have said, it's ALL about CONFIDENCE. You don't have very much, because you've convinced yourself that people won't like you because of... your nose? Come on, anyone who won't be your friend because of your nose is a VERY shallow person, and you won't want to be their friend anyway.
I used to have confidence issues myself (a few people here can definetely confirm that). I used to blame everyone and everything except myself for people not liking me, and me not having friends.
Eventually I jus got tired of blaming everyone so I said "Fuck it, I don't care anymore". Once I adapted that attitude (of not caring what anyone thinks of me) and actually BELIEVED in it (not pretending to act like you don't care), things started changing. All of a sudden, I had no problem talking to whoever I wanted too (and have them respond). At work, people actually liked me because of who I was, not what I looked like. I wasn't in school anymore at that time but I'm sure things would've gotten a LOT better at school as well.
Believe me when I say it's all about your attitude. You've experienced it yourself, even. You said after your operation people actually started noticing you (or whatever it was you said, don't remember). Point was, things were looking better, right? Do you honestly think it was because of your nose? Hell no. It was your confidence and your attitude.
I'm sure you've seen the following: Ugly guy with hot girlfriend? How do you think that came about? Obviously not through looks, and I'm willing to bet it had SOMETHING to do with the guy's attitude.
I'm not saying if you change your attitude you'll get a hot girlfriend, I'm just showing an example of attitude being the difference.
What it took for me to change was me having to look at what I was like and making a decision: Is this how I want to be? Do I really care what people think of me?
Hopefully you can find that something that will change your attitude. I'm pretty sure plastic surgery is not the way though.
You gotta look around and be honest tho, there are some people who are just so ugly they could be the most confident person, but if there nerdy and ugly as hell, they will be put down by girls alot, and thats what happend to me, girls sitting in class would turn around and ask me for no reason, "why are you so ugly?", "Did you break your face or something?", "do you live in poverty, cuz your acne is really bad?"....beleive it or not, guys have to be at least attractive "in a certian way" to get a girl...they might not be handsome or w/e to get a good girl but im sure they dont look like some anime dragon thick glasses acne nerd and walking around with some hot girl, cuz i know thats never happend in my school.
And trust me, no one who is put down on a daily basis can have a high confidence unless they're on crack.
So im pretty sure you prolly didnt get called names every five seconds. Prolly just turned out you were actually normal looking as can be.
> So im pretty sure you prolly didnt get called names every five seconds
I hate to disappoint you, but that's exactly what it was like for me.
And not only that, after I come home from school, guess what? I got put down by my father, mother, and even my sister.
So yes, I know EXACTLY what you're feeling. And yes, people HAVE turned around and insulted me in class. People have even yelled it across the room, and even teachers have called me stupid because I couldn't understand something on multiple occasions.
> guys have to be at least attractive "in a certian way" to get a girl
That is true. And many girls (even on here) will tell you that confidence is attractive to a lot of girls. I know it seems difficult to believe, but to some people, looks really don't matter. Like I said, the ugly guy with the hot girlfriend (I know you've seen this) is a perfect example.
Also, the whole "looks don't matter" works the other way around, too. MOST "hot chicks" have horrible personalities, and the only reason people go out with them is because they are hot and because they probably put out a lot.
Go to a grocery stone. Look around: How many hot moms do you see? Maybe a few, but most moms are not hot. Point is, looks don't matter to many people.
I think part of the problem you're having is that high schools these days are the cruelest place you'll ever be in. Kids are vicious (as you already know) these days, and everyone is trying to fit in. Those who don't fit in get insulted and made fun of on a regular basies. That's how high school is these days, and it's horrible, but everyone is afraid of not being accepted by the "cool kids".
Well for me, and the reason i did the surgery, wasn't so people would accept me....it was so i could accept myself.
Because, alright, well me, i listen to heavy metal and thats who i am, you know that type.
Well, everyone ive ever seen who seems to be that type of person, looks it too, at least to a certain extent, they kinda look "hardcore"-ish
Well my santa claus nose....makes me look like a cute little baby, or a small child....and it makes me look soooo unmanly and idk....just....its something i can't stand....
It just makes me look so funny, and it makes me look like well a poser i think....i mean looking at me without clothes on, you'de prolly look at me and think "yeah either he's a really preppy kid, or ona those "do-gooder" kids who is a teachers pet" because i look that way in the face.
And to me....idk i just wish my nose was more "manly" i guess so that you know, i could go out, wear clothes that fit the way i feel, and not think i look like a complete poser...
Cuz i mean i have tried wearing like rockerish looking clothes and even my best friend called me a poser, when he even knows what type of music i listen to, and everyone says "i just don't have the "look" for that type of clothes.
Its like fat girls, people say most of them don't have the "look" to fit in flashy hot clothes that show everything.
It's kinda the same thing....
It's like a really fat girl (no offesne to anyone here) wearing a miniskirt, everyone will look and be like "why in the world is she wearing that?"
Well people have done that to me when i wear the clothes i like. Literally all my freinds will say "you know, that look just doesnt fit ya."
I look different than i feel on the inside, and i just wish my outside seemed to show me just as much as my inside does....
Idk i guess i feel like most fat girls prolly do.
And me and everyone here can prolly agree that alotta fat girls get made fun of and dont have chances with guys.
Idk thats just how i feel.
Confidence is the key. That point still stands.
> what type of music i listen to, and everyone says "i just don't have the "look" for that type of clothes.
About the whole "dressing the part" thing... why do you have to dress according to what music you listen to?
I'll use myself as an example once more: I listen to rap/hip hop/all that. I'm a skinny ass white dude who wears nothing but khakis and grey t-shirts (and whatever i have to wear to work).
Does that sound like someone who listens to rap? No. Do I care? No. When people ask me what kind of music I listen to and I tell them, yeah, they kinda look at me like "Oh... ok" but the thing is: I don't give a fuck. It's what I want to listen to, so that's what I'm going to do. According to your thinking, I should be out wearing bling and having my pants fall down with every step I take. But with my thinking, I wear whatever I want, and that's that.
> And me and everyone here can prolly agree that alotta fat girls get made fun of
I'm glad you brought this up. You can only make fun of someone if it they let it bother them. No one will be able to make fun of you unless you take offense to it.
I find that "fat people" are generally the funniest people around - why? Because they get made fun of a lot in this world and they deal with it by not letting it bother them and instead cracking a joke. Does that make sense?
I would type more, but I'm tired and am going to bed. I'll be back tomorrow though
Fat people n ugly people are funny as hell sometimes
Thats why i wouldnt trade the freinds i have for no one right now
But you know, the only reason i wanna "look the part" for the rockerish thing
Is cuz i WANT to
I wanna go out, look good, feel good about myself cuz i like it when i look cool, cuz really there have been times in my life, like couple months ago, i thoguth i was hot shit and i felt like no one could tell me anything bad cuz i thought i looked good and thats what gives me alot of confidence idk thats just how i am
I mean all i wear is t-shirts n khaki's too...and i know lots of people like that who listen to rap, and rap is such a common thing that just about anyone can listen to it.
But metal alotta the times, when you listen to it, its something you really wanna look the part of, because not that many people listen to metal as rap, so you kinda wanna go out there and represent yourself so you can find freinds who like the same intrest, cuz i know thats what i do if i see someone who looks rockerish ill try to talk to them, just cuz i figure hey they like the same type of music as me...
If you wanna dress like the "metal-type" then go ahead and do it.
But apparently you don't think you look the part. That's the self-confidence issue. That's what I mean when you have the attitude of "I don't care what other people think of me".
2 different girls today said smart ass shit to me and called me shit...I'm a senior, this shouldn't happen to me! girls shouldnt like...pick on me ! -_-...
I feel like such a loser right now...
It just feels like no matter what i do or how much i try to just be normal, people judge me before they get to know me...
And i know that people in my school dont do that to people who look normal...they're just cool with them automatically...
It really isn't the looks, Someone young. Just by the way we carry ourselves and our expressions, we send messages. And the way we carry ourselves, the message we sent to other people, depends on how we feel about ourselves. If you feel you are a worthless loser, you will send the message "treat me like a worthless loser" to others. If you feel (accurately) that you are as worthwhile a person as anyone else, you will send the message "treat me with respect". So if you change your attitude to yourself, you'll change the way others treat you.
Ok so im being brave and doing this.
I'ma post my pics on here, mainly because its a "right after" and "6 months after" pic comparison of how my nose surgery turned out.
3 weeks after my surgery, and my nose looked exactly how i wanted it, and my doctore said it would get EVEN BETTER with time.
A picture I just took 15 mins ago, and my nose looks 10X fatter than in the other pic, it might be even bigger than my nose was before the surgery....And you can clearly see why im so dissapointed...Nose surgery resuts are supposed to get SMALLER with time not BIGGER, even my doctore said so, but my nose looks so FAT now. Its like i didnt even have the surgery or something.
And the sad part is, my mom, even tho ive showed her these pics, doesn't beleive my nose got 10X bigger! She wont take me to a diff doctor or anything! she thinks my nose is "perfect" and its driving me insane!!! I'm surrounded by idiots when i need to go to a professional doctor for help on my nose to see what wrong, especially if there might be something MAJORLY wrong with my healing process, that needs immidiate fixing!
Oh yeah, and those pics are pretty much proof i dont look as "normal" as any other fucker out there ^_^.
Thank you for posting your pics, Someone young. It means we can advise you knowing more about what we're talking about.
There have been a number of people on this site who complain about how ugly they are. Then they put up their pictures, and they are not ugly at all. What is wrong is not their looks, but how they see themselves.
You are one of those people. Neither picture looks ugly. You do look normal - or better than normal. Your nose does not look too swollen in the second picture - but it does look narrower. I wonder if what happened was that there was swelling in the outer part of your nose, and it has now gone down and so the central part of your nose now looks relatively bigger.
But I would caution against any more surgery. It seems clear that you can never be exactly sure what you are going to get. Consider Michael Jackson as an awful warning.
Rather, it would be better to consider why you think so badly of yourself, when you are in fact a good-looking young man.
It seems like, to me, in the first picture, I got the results i wanted...
And the second picure, it seems like all around the tip of my nose, idk, it just looks really fat, to me it just seems like those two pictures show 2 completely different noses.
And just the dissapointment of going through the surgery, it turning out good, then going BAD over time, and also how much i hated my old nose for it to turn out looking exactly the same if not worse...
It's just so depressing.
Oh and for the more sugeries.....If i was planning on finding a doctor that could fix my nose and make it look 'better" to me, i would make sure i went to a defintate professional. And i would see what his opinions on it were, and if he thought an additional surgery could benefit me greatly or not. Micheal Jackson has had about 5 nose jobs probably lol, well its true, even a news thing was n the net about it, his doctor had done at least 5 on him, but if you look up alot of his old pics, most people will agree that his results from his first one, even his second one were really good. He just kept thinking something was wrong and kept going too far,and kept getting them. he didnt turn into the awful looking mess he is now just by one surgery.
And for me, the one thing on my face that seems to make me look the worst is my nose. A fat nose can make you definatly look un-sexy, and even "dull" as in not smart.
Like my drama class other day, we were reading a script.
And one character was a slow, dumb, dull hillbilly.
He was descirbed in the lesson as having a thick body, thick round face, thick features, and just all alround that kind of appearance, and that someone who fit that look should play the role.
And to me, thats what i think i look like. And i've always hated it. I just think my thick wide nose makes me look "not smart"
when im really smart, i make really good grades.
Its just looking at me, i think most people would think "im not all there" just because of my looks, idk i just think i look "slow".
Also my nose now looks like one youde find on a asian or black person. And it looks perfectly fine on them, but just on a white person....that look isnt a good thing....ever.
I just want to have a normal nose for once, so i can go out and have confidence in the fact that people wont think i look odd.
It's just like people with big humps in their noses, it really does hinder their appearance even if their whole rest of their face looks good....and idk....im just so tired of feeling like i dont look 'normal'...and even for once ide like to look "sexy, and hot"....and i def think that no one would ever think that way about me now....i would just love to have a attractive face...so itd be worth doing things like working out, or getting a job and being social, and taking pictures and them actually looking good would be nice too....
The thing is, you do have an attractive face. It doesn't look thick-featured, and you don't look dumb - not in the slightest. The fact that you can look at yourself and think that, shows something is wrong. More surgery on your nose won't fix that, because you'll still find the result unsatisfactory, and then it will be a third, then a fourth . . .
Could I draw your attention to Body Dysmorphic Disorder?
Thank you for posting the pictures, I was curious to see whether there was truly an issue with you nose, or it was something you manifested in your own mind. And let me tell you, it's in your head because I honest think you are a very handsome young man. And no I am not just saying that to boost your ego, I truly think you are a handsome.
I took both pictures and put them beside each other and I personally cannot see a huge difference at all. They are basically identical, only difference I really see is the “ball” of the nose in the second pictures looks SLIGHTLY “bigger”. Only thing I like better about the first picture, is your hair hehe wink.
I know it’s easier said than done, because I myself am very critical about the way I look. My teeth are slightly bigger than normal and not perfectly straight. I’d love to have cosmetic surgery to have veneers done so I had the perfect smile. Facial I don’t think I’m all that attractive, and I’m tall and thin and wish I had more muscle so I didn’t look so damned lanky. But with that said I know these are the cards I was dealt and I just need to keep my chin up and know I’m a good person regardless what people think about how I look, because when it comes down to it they are the pathetic ugly people for judging me on something so superficial.
Attitude plays a large part in how you’ll feel about yourself. If you dwell too much on every imperfection you are going to have a miserable depressed life. But I think what people don’t understand is that those imperfections are what makes us human and makes us dynamic. Hell often times those imperfections are what makes many people attractive, hell I’ll go as far as saying sexy. Imagine having the perfect body, could you imagine how boring that would be?? I personally want uniqueness.
I know I probably wasn’t much help, and you probably won’t even believe me when I said I think you are handsome; I often don’t when people tell me the same thing. Keep your chin up and smile.
<span style="color: green">"Don't be a Dork! Wrap your Pork!" </span><br /><br />