Hey all, I've been lurking a bit and figured I need someone/people to talk to. I'm just finishing up my first year in college, and I've been depressed through most of it, or at least it feels like I am/have been. I feel down a lot and an empty feeling in my chest like something's missing. It makes me angry and makes me want to hurt myself or just do something completely stupid, I've held myself back so far.
Anyway, I think it all boils down to my lack of a social life. I have a couple friends here and I tried to start a relationship with a girl this year, no good on that one. I'm not much of a ladies' man, so it pretty much killed my self-confidence.
I moved from one state to another (halfway across the country) the summer before I entered college, and left a couple good friends behind, especially two girls that I still keep in touch with. They ask me for advice on guys, and each time I give them the best advice I can, but I find myself longing to be that guy, and hating myself for having to move with my family away from the friends I had. (I had dated one of the girls previously, and I'm really good friends with the other.) I realize it's not really my fault, but I find myself blaming myself for everything in my life. Little things have been starting to aggravate me and I find I'm a very angry person, very often. I don't show this much, I'm good at hiding my feelings. I've thought about seeing a counselor/doctor, but I can't actually see myself doing it.
There's probably more, but I think this has gone on long enough, sorry for the lengthy post. Just felt I needed someone to finally vent to. Any advice or anything would be appreciated.