you all are so sweet.i think pink and i suffer from the same problem.i never accept compliments. i always assume they're lying. or just saying it because they feel bad for me because im so fat.
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Self-Image
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All my friends are better-looking than me too! They all have everything "a brotha" is looking for meanwhile I on the other hand....I understand about not accepting compliments. Comparing yourself to other people isn't going to help you in any way. There's always going to be pretty girls walking around. But you are different from each and every one of them and beautiful in your own unique way. I know that sounded so hallmarkish but it's true.
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And if it weren't for ones like me, none of you would be so gorgeous! lol. Just kidding, the thing is, we all have our flaws, and we all have our perfections...I've gotten fat, and wrinkled, and I have frizzy hair, freckles and a unibrow..lol. I just deal, I mean, if you don't like it, don't look at it. I do things to "tame" the flaws, like pluck the brow, and tie up the hair. I have the most amazing friends though! I also know that they really love me, not, love to look at me. I am not the ugliest person ever, but I like knowing my man is here because of me, NOT because he wants a prize to show off, that gets put in the closet when he gets home.
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Welcome to the neverending question plaguing all of us. Be happy, I know redudant, but internal beauty can shed through physical beauty. Have you ever known an extremely attractive woman with a bad attitude keep a good man? Nope! A cute looking girl with an awesome attitude wins out a hott looking girl anytime. Just look at Jennifer Anniston, cute but fine with her attitude.
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Thanks Guys. You've really helped:)
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I feel the exact same way. I stare at my boyfriend because he's so good looking (he's convinced that I'm looking at him, wondering how he will look once he gets older).
I also feel unattractive because girls "like me" aren't really desired (for those who don't get it--look at my user name). I always feel like I have to dress nicer than the other girls around me just to make myself feel comparable to them.
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see? and it almost seems like you shouldn't even bother, right? because you're already grouped into that "unattractive" area for what you are... It's whatever. I just go with the idea that it's a unique beauty people have yet to grasp. In which case it's their loss.Pepsi, you remind me so much of my sister it's kind of scary. But that's a good thing.
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thats so sad =(the thing is ive seen classys actual picture before, and shes gorgeous!!! just like you said abi, everyone gets put in their own little group. its pathetic
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Imma slap the holy hell outta every woman I ever hear call themselves less than beautiful from now on (Kris, you're included in that bunch..lol).You know what I hate about Hollywood, magazines, T.V. shows, etc.? They're FAKE!! They don't account for real beauty and the sad thing is women compare themselves to it thinking if they don't look like them there's something wrong with them. I have several pet peeves but I think that by far is my biggest pet peeve. These women are airbrushed for hours at a time. They have acting tape in places I don't even wanna think about. They have different camera angles and lenses to make you look smaller, taller, wider, bigger..whatever you want. And NOW? Now they're using computers more and more to edit even MORE imperfections. Every woman I know has a problem with their body. Why? Because the assholes of the world have us all convinced that there's something wrong with us if we don't look "perfect" or have the "perfect" measurements. Plus Size Model 1 Fawnia Mondey Figure and Fitness Competitor Plus Size Model 2 Helena Christensen My Favorite Fig & Fitness competitor - some of you may know her as Venom from AG All of these women are fairly different yet to me they're all beautiful. And keep in mind what I said earlier. They spend hours in makeup to look the way they do in those photos. What I'm trying to point out is that regardless of whether you're bigger, smaller, ripped, whatever..everyone of you are beautiful. You all have something to offer.The reasons your boyfriends picked you is because of who you are! I would have absolutely no problem standing next to any of those women with my boyfriend present. One because Fawnia and Beth could kick his ass. But more importantly because I know even though he may take a second look it's me he goes home with at night. My attitude was what won him over, btw.I am not the worlds biggest feminist but I do believe that we as women need to stick together and stop criticizing ourselves for being imperfect. Your body was specifically designed for you the day your parents created you.And look at this way. You're wondering what your boyfriend is doing with you? I guarantee you he asks himself what you're doing with him. I mean after all, he chews food with his mouth open, farts in public, and sometimes he may even forget to shower. But you love him anyway right?All I'm saying is all of you ladies are beautiful. You all add something different to the world and if you weren't on this earth there would be a void where you once were because no one else would be like you. You are unique in every way so there's nothing to compare originality to.
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Thanks hon for that post. it made me smile.in my opinion, those plus size models are friggin gorgeous. so curvy and they just have a "glow" about them. i guess its the fact that they have the confidence to be a model even tho they arent a size 1.im like.. a size 16. my bf loves my curves, but whenever i go out in public i feel like everyone is looking at my flaws instead of me. but if i put on my sexy red pumps and my makeup just right, i do feel a lot better.if i lost my stretch marks i wouldnt feel half as bad about myself as i do. my complexion is so pale and they show up really bad under certain lighting. What im sick of tho is how in some stores i normally wear a size 34/34 jean. but then i go to another store and i cant even get the same size up past my ass. it really brings down my confidence. what im ALSO sick of, is how i try on a shirt thats a large or extra large, and the chest is soooo tiny!! its supppsed to be a size LARGE, so why cant it fit a large chest?!?! sighi tried going to a plus size store, and the sizes are way too big. so im like, in between sizes. it drives me nuts.edit: im perving the second plus size model.. and her dress.. omg. i want it. it in my opinion, would fit me pretty well.
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Did anyone see the first plus sized model win ANTM?
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=)I just got this email from my bf's sister. I think it suits this thread well. "An elderly Chinese woman had two large pots, each hung on the ends of a polewhich she carried across her neck.One of the pots had a crack in it while the other pot was perfect and alwaysdelivered a full portion of water.At the end of the long walks from the stream to the house, the cracked potarrived only half full.For a full two years this went on daily, with the woman bringing home onlyone and a half pots of water.Of course , the perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments.But the poor cracked pot was ashamed of its own imperfection, and miserablethat it could only do half of what it had been made to do.After two years of what it perceived to be bitter failure, it spoke to thewoman one day by the stream'I am ashamed of myself, because this crack in my side causes water to leakout all the way back to your house.'The old woman smiled, 'Did you notice that there are flowers on your side ofthe path, but not on the other pot's side?''That's because I have always known about your flaw, so I planted flowerseeds on your side of the path, and every day while we walk back, you waterthem.''For two years I have been able to pick these beautiful flowers to decoratethe table.Without you being just the way you are, there would not be this beauty tograce the house.'Each of us has our own unique flaw. But it's the cracks and flaws we eachhave that make our lives together so very interesting and rewarding.You've just got to take each person for what they are and look for the goodin them."
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I've seen it lots of times, but it definitely fits in this thread! Nice find, and thanks for the share!
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You've got to stop concentrating on what you perceive as a flaw and focus on all the good qualities about you.
For example, I know I'm a bigger girl (a problem I am remedy-ing) but instead of focusing on the fact that I am bigger I focus on what I do have going. I'm smart as hell, I'm funny, I'm outgoing, I have a great job, and I want to be a doctor. I have beautiful eyes that are crystal clear blue and I happen to think my butt is looking pretty damn good these days. I am very proud of it too! I have tons going for me and any guy would be *lucky* to date me. But you don't have to give that vibe off. Just concentrate on what makes you - you. If a shirt doesn't fit you the way you think it should get the next size bigger and if it's too big or just a little too baggy, save some cash and have it tailored to fit you. Some places will charge you as little as 10 bucks to take a shirt in. And concentrate on wearing clothing that compliments your body type.
The reason I posted the pictures of the women I chose is because they are ALL different. Different shapes, different sizes, different backgrounds. But the one thing that makes them similar is that you can tell from their pictures they are comfortable in their own skin and they love who they are!! But I'm willing to bet even *they* have some flaw on their body they wish they could fix.
I chose Beth Horn and Fawnia Mondey, because some women these women are strong, fit, they love 'body building', and they are fine examples of women who said, "screw what you think."
I chose the plus size models for the exact same reason. They don't care what we think. They're there because they want to be. Because they can be.
To compare ourselves to other women, imo, is a joke in and of itself because we God broke the mold when he made each of us. No two people are exactly alike. Not even identical twins like all of the exact same things. I love the originality of all people and can appreciate everyone for who they are. I may get along better with one personality type than I do another but that's okay. We're all individuals looking for our own unique place in this crazy world.
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Just gonna throw my manly perspective in cos I feel like it.
I totally dig larger girls - way more than skinny girls. Now I'm not talking dangerously overweight, run-out-of-breath-while-standing-still girls (though I have dated a couple), but just curvier "sturdier" girls, though that's a terrible word to use.
I've been trying to make my point to Cenfath about this but she's got it into her head that she wants to be a beefcake :P
I just have a thing for a smoother body. Ribs are a huge turnoff for me (though my housemate goes crazy for puny girls like that!)Not that *anyone* in this thread looks overweight at all. Just sounds like girl's "i'm so ugly" syndrome. Pretty much all girls have it, so don't feel left out or weird.
Some of the most utterly stunning girls I know are ultra-paranoid about their appearance.
I'm going on holiday in a month with a whole load of friends, one female friend of which has recently slimmed down from a size 16 to a size 10/12. Now when my friend was a size 16 (UK size this is) I thought she was totally hot. Really curvy, awesome rockin' tits and generally very attractive. Now she's slimmer I'm not so attracted to her.
But that's not the story. Another girl I know who by magazine standards has a perfect body (she's a size 12, but she's very tall and has like E-cup boobies, teeny tiny waist) was then complaining that she was going to be "the fattest girl on holiday".I mean honestly.
One of the finalists for Miss England 2008 is a "plus-size" model (though I don't think size 14 counts as "plus size") but I think she's really attractive (in a way that does not legally implicate me, of course)
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Well, Hell. I feel like that a lot of the time.It's very rarely I find myself superior to my partner at any time. Doesn't bother me though. I'm not much help saying this, but I really don't care too much. I'm me, and when I"m not single, I assume they're with me for their own reasons, so it's not my place to judge that. I like me, regardless how I feel.
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I did not say I want to be a beefcake. I said there is nothing wrong with women who have muscle! Imma play slap a ho with you when I see you on MSN next. My personal taste is that I look more attractive to myself with muscle definition and a lean body than the other way around. So that's what I'm shooting for. I did not say I wanted to look like the woman you showed me the other day who was taking steroids (or that photo was photoshopped).Smoother bodies is fine for some but for me personally, I like being very fit and active and I love muscle! So
