My apologys to the people that are getting really annoyed with my constant problems but.....okay heres the rundown...my exgirlfriend, whom i will call A, me and our friend, whom i will call B, have always been good friends.Last night, me and A were on the phone, and she said "B said we should all go to a movie" and i replied "that sounds like fun..." there was never much to it. but later on, she said "great, now so and so wants to hang out!" so naturally i replied in my usual jokey manner..."Well go hang out with her! me and B will see the movie ourselves!" well, little does A know, i have been talking heavy with B.... like 4 hours a night twice in a row.... but anyways...so when A said " i am not comfortable with yall hanging out just the 2 of you" i was thinking "you broke up with me ill do whatever i want!" and then today, me and B were still going to go to the movie. I talked to my grandma about it (shes like my own personal psychiatrist, its awesome) and followed what she said. I went to meet A after she got out of camp, and it went like this:ME:I need to talk to you.A: about what?ME: well, me and B might go to that movie around 5...A: Whatever!then she started walking away all fast... i explained to her that it was just as friends, not a romantic thing, and that nothing would happen. she kept giving me whatevers and i dont cares but i could tell she was pissed at me... when we got to her house. she said bye and i left. she wouldnt talk to me anymore and i was like... ummm okay....so I left, walked about an hour in 95 degree humidity back to my house, and was talking to B... well B was instant messaging A, and somehow, her mom saw a message A sent B... that read something along the lines of "I am not comfortable with you 2 being together alone..." well then her mom was thinking "it would look to much like a date to A, so we shouldnt even go"I was upset, but i understood, and after I thaught about it i figured "why ruin 2 friendships over a date? we dont need to go out yet..." and so i text messaged A and said "were not going to the movie, i thought about it and figured it would be best for everyone not too......so she never replyed, until like.... 11 PM, like 7 hours after i last spoke to her, and she was all pissed off at me for not following her wishes! i told her that i did nothing wrong and shes saying "I cant stand you or being your friend. dont bother meeting me after camp today. dont come!"I have been nothing but kind and fair and thinking about everyone but that really pisses me off that me deciding that a date WOULDNT be the best idea and being the bigger man just makes her mad..... im really sorry for the long read everyone, but i need help and i desperately need to vent...1) should i even bother maintaining a friendship with A? its all walking on eggshells....2) The 4 people ive talked to about it says its okay, but is it okay for me to be talking and making plans with my FRIEND, B?3) for people who have to deal with women ( no offence to yall, ya just act crazy sometimes! still love yall tho! ) if a girl is that pissed off, is there any talking to her possible? or is it bassically a lost cause?THANKS SO MUCH to everyone or anyone that can help me. i love these boards.-- -- Terified -- --
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Friendship Impossible?
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- It's very hard to maintain a friendship after gf/bf relationship has broken down. For it to work, both sides need to want to make it work.In this case, you are trying but A isn't. She's feeling upset and jealous, and indulging her feelings. She seems very self-centred, and I think you may well have had a lucky escape. I can't see much hope of, or point in, continuing a friendship with A.2. You've been released by A from your relationship - of course you can date B. A doesn't own you any more.3. Often anger is a good sign, meaning things can be talked about and resolved; but in this case I think it's a lost cause.
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thank you. i suppose i should end it with her but a relationship with B would be hard if me and A werent even cool anymore
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This A girl sounds like a mentalist.I've been out with girls like that - they never change.You need to force her out of your life immediately. She's a nutbar. It'll be hard, but just restrict levels of contact and eventually it'll just stop.You can be doing without her. She wants to go and have fun with other guys but she doesn't want you to have any fun. We call this being selfish.She wants you to be miserable, and then wants to rub it in your face by having more fun than you. We call this being a bitch.If you like B, and you reckon she likes you back - I say go for it. Don't let A ruin your life.