Hi everyone,wanted to know how people deal with hearing someone close to them is pregnant when a teenager. My younger cousin who is 19 recently is pregnant and has recieved mixed reactions from family members, some of which I was quite surprised about. Just wanted to know what you would do even if it wasnt supporting them? As I said I want to know about ALL reaction typesThanks
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Teen pregnancy reaction
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it depends if they were in a relationship or sleeping around lol.my mom got pregnant with me when she was 16, so really i wouldn't care. I see how hard it was on her, so i definately wouldnt recommend it to any body, but if that does happen to them i would support them any way i could.
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My cousin had her first kid at 18 I think and is onto number two.My reaction would depend on the person. Some people I know would be very upset and wanting a termination so I'd be suportive in a it's ok, I can come with you if thats what you want kinda way.Others would be ok with having kids young and then I'd just be happy for them and take them out to celebrate.If it's someone at school who is known to be abit trampy, I have some what of a tsk tsk reaction. But it's their choice.If it were me I'd hope the people I know would go for option B and just be happy for me. Just becuase it's not planned dosn't mean it has to be a bad thing.
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Personally, I don't know anyone who's gotten pregnant in their teens.
However, when I read things like this, it makes me wonder why some teens are so stupid.
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Babies are not fashion accesories.I blame hollywood for this trend.
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I got pregnant the first time I ever had sex and had my son when I was 16. No one was supportive except for my sister (step-sister). So when my 17 year old neice got pregnant, I was always there for her and always will be.
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I would be obviously upset by hearing that kind of news. But if the person I know is direct family as in a brother I wouldn't mind as much (however considering that my brothers are both older than me in their mid twenties and early thirties, well you get what I mean). But if it were one of my cousins I would get angry and then shortly thereafter (and I mean extremely thereafter) I would support her indefinitely.
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Teen pregnancy doesn't really bother me to much, I guess I'm kinda used to it, almost all of my cousins on dad's side of the family have either spawned yet more of the clan, or are in the process of attempting to do so... a lot of my cousins are also considerably younger than me, as in going all the way down to a few who're still children, though largely they're at least up to their late teens, but most of them have le sprogs... Teen pregnancy isn't something to be shied away from or have any harsh feelings towards... it happens, simple as, it's not always planned, and yes, sometimes it's a silly thing to do, but, family is family, and you should always be there for the important people in your life ... and yes, that to me means friends as well as family Also: I don't think it's something people should look down on, it's incredibly brave to have a child in your teens, because, as my lovely gf points out, a lot of people look down on younger people with children, which, I find to be a little disgusting, because surely, we're all people who should all be treated equally.
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I completely agree with you. When my cousin told me I was really excited for her there was no feelings of how stupid or what are you going to do. That is why I have added this post cause I found it bery confronting that my brother was the most upset about it even though he barelly knows her. The most supportive have been her parernts and brother. I found it really confronting that people got angry but said they were still would support them 100%. They may feel like they are supporting them, but how does making getting angry or withdrawn help?
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Originally Posted By: fin tail
They may feel like they are supporting them, but how does making getting angry or withdrawn help?
In my opinion, getting angry or upset is a fair reaction.To me, it's more than getting mad because she's simply pregnant. She and the teen dad have now just burden the lives of her family, the dad's family, and their own. If some families are more understanding and supportive, that's fine. But I think it's selfish if they expect their families to support them.
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Originally Posted By: Virtual_Star But I think it's selfish if they expect their families to support them. I don't think it's really selfish to expect the people you love and care about in life to show support, supporting dosn't mean you agree with their choices or like what they're doing, just that you're going to be their for them becuase you love them. What I do think is selfish is expecting more then just support from your family.
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Originally Posted By: CuteNCrazy supporting dosn't mean you agree with their choices or like what they're doing, You lost me. Isn't what you said contradicting? Originally Posted By: CuteNCrazy I don't think it's really selfish to expect the people you love and care about in life to show support, supporting dosn't mean you agree with their choices or like what they're doing, just that you're going to be their for them becuase you love them. I guess you're talking about "unconditional love"? Sometimes, I think that's just overrated.
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I think the point is, being supportive doesn't necessarily mean: "oh, well done, get preggers again asap" ... it's more an understanding that what's happened (on the whole) isn't likely to have been planned, but that when the choices are limited to: keep the baby, or get rid of the baby, personally, I think a family should offer support, because, there are ways after the baby is born, if they (the teens) believe they cannot support the child (eg adoption) to deal with things, but, you NEED the people you love to support you in a situation like that!!I know even now, if I got my gf pregnant, I would very much like it if people (family) were there for me (and they will be, my mum wants to be a grandma), and it's more expected of me, as I'll be 28 on tuesday, so not like I've just turned 13 or 14 or something I think the moral of the story, from my point of view is that if you love your friends and family, you will be there to support them nomatter what, it's not just about teen pregnancy when you think about it like that, it's about offering your support in any situation that you rather bury your head in the sand about, but by being a person they trust (be it forced in the case of a parent) you should be there for them
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I see where you're coming from and that's cool. But to me, the whole "support them no matter what" is overrated sometimes. It's not so much as burying my head in the sand, it's just not my problem if some young teen I knew got pregnant, even if that teen was my sister or cousin or friend.I guess to me, it depends on the person but I personally just hate getting involved with people's business. It's why I don't really like being reliable too much. I like to keep my life trouble-free as much as possible.Lucky me, I've never been in such a situation and probably won't be until I'm a parent. But god I seriously hope not.
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Everytime someone states that teen pregnancy is a burden I like to think of it this way.... Sex is out there, people have sex, its a fact. If my daughter came home and told me she had AIDs I know that that would in fact be a geater burden on my life cause I know through the pure emotional trauma how difficult I know her life will be and wouldn't be angry cause of the life threatenign situation ahead of her, which is so much worse then being pregnant. I think a child coming into MY family, MY kin through blood is so much more precious and would become apart of my life regardless of if my daughter had to rely on me in the harder times. I too would be getting something out of it which is positive from her having a child. That is why I can not be agree and get surprised when others do.
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Teen pregnancy is a restriction, in my honest opinion. It just restricts you. I have numerous friends who go to the High, that get pregnant at like 14 and 15 years old. And then have the nerve to get an abortion. I'm used to though because everywhere you turn around some chic is getting preggers. It's whatever. What's more disappointing is when you have a teen pregnancy more than once and it's not the same guy. Like seriously, if you're 16 years old and you have 3 children with 3 different baby daddy's who haven't even finished high school, I mean come on you can't be serious. Retardation to the max.
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When I first hear about a teenager being pregnant.. the first thought that automatically goes thru my head is "slut" and "stupid".I know that sounds bad.. but thats how it goes.. i can't help myself. I think about how irresponsible that person is.. I'd still support the person if she was my friend or family member.