Dead and Burried

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Do you think it's better for the family if you have all the shit when you die prearranged or is it better to let them do it as sort of their own cathartic process of grieving?Not than I plan of going tits up anytime soon but for obvious reasons I've been thinking about this shit.

I think having all the major stuff already planned out is a positive thing, I feel that will give the family more time to grieve instead of dealing with every detail.

For my family, we always go through the family pictures; that seem to be my family's cathartic way of dealing with death. Helps us remember all the good and funny times.

I'm tryin' not to make this about me but it isn't something my wife or mother would be willing to discuss. Their both already pissed at me for being sick. If I brought it up it the response would be, "Why, what did the doctor tell you?"As far as getting what I want, I don't care, I'm dead. Everybody already knows and has known for some time if we don't have kids all the old NDN family heirlooms that aren't buried with me are to be burned and destroyed.But this is no matter anyway I don't plan on diein'... just yet. To the topic at hand. I can go either way, as with most things in my life. I could say it would be nice to plan the funeral and stuff as a last act of love for my wife or mother or whoever, but I could also say that shit doesn't really matter cause it was about the life not the body.With granny, mom and I voluntarily stepped aside with planning the funeral because of the hatred among my family between the NDNs and the whites. The reason we did it was because we were close to her in her life, so we didn't feel the need. The rest were kinda distant from her we figured they needed the closure. I don't think either one of us felt we missed out on some part of the process.Then I go back to feeling it would be an honor to fix mom up right and put her away the best way possible. I would want to do that for her.

>>>"Man, I don't know how this is for you, but it's really hard for me!"

It's not really like anything. Kinda like debating buying this car or that. Then just throw in a dash a fear and heap of regret... neither of which have any bearing on the reality of the hear and now.

>>>"Question: Is there a purpose/need of burying family heirlooms with the deceased?"

Yeah, so the don't end up in a fuckin' museum or worse yet hanging on some attorneys office wall as western decor.

I always told myself if I was in a position of knowing I was going to die, I would make a video tape of myself talking to my family and letting them know what they mean to me. Also kind of distribute some of my personal items and explain to that person why I want them to have it. I dunno, sappy maybe but I feel at least this way they get another way to remember me visually.

To Eddie, I leave my half used bottle of heated lube.To Lish, I leave my Japanese knot tying book... the one that not all the pages are stuck together.To Rad, I leave my handcuffs with the rusty cum stain. Sorry no video. If you didn't know what you mean to me than fuck ya.

I am deeply honored. I wonder how I will tie the knots and read at the same time.This topic makes me sad to think about. I am going to ignore your 3 feet of personal space rule. tacklehugs Scotty

Well I ain't dead yet... just don't get the blood pressure in my noggin up. :grin:

Furthermore, I don't plan on bein' dead anytime soon, there's a good chance that all this shit could still be nothing and even if it is something as long as I don't over do it I can be fixed by 'em cut into my head.

It's just the kind of crap that makes a man think, ya know.

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To Natasha, I leave a thumb drive copier so next time she gets the pics up front... that way they're readily able to be shared.

To Chance, I leave all my vile, anger and hatred. He's the only one who could put 'er to some good use.

It's all the other shit that makes 'em think it may be something more. The headaches coupled with the sensation of heat and sensitivity to light. (I haven't started hissing at sunlight yet but I'm becoming more vampiric than usual. :grin: ) I think what further pushes 'em that way is all of this is only located on the right side of my head. Well, that and my family history.

Besides like I've said many times I could also just as easily be nothing. That's what I'm hoping for anyway.

So in which category do you fall, prearrange or leave to others to do in a manner that's most therapeutic for them (if it is at all)?

Quote:I'm surprised that your doctors looked into things, mine didn't give a shit. That's because you live in Canada.

Hey missy, you didn't answer the original question either. Don't make me have to spank you... I may not be able to handle it. :wink:

I know, I don't like to think about it. I would much prefer thinking of spankings though. If I must answer....I would prefer the arrangements already be made. The one and only time I was involved in making funeral arrangements (not too long ago either), I thought it was complete torture for me and the family. Talking about the obituary and money and digging the hole and what kind of makeup to put on her etc. I didn't want to think about any of that. I just wanted to grab her out of the casket and 'wake her up'. What a nightmare.

Well, you could always get a second opinion here in Cleveland. And then have a one night stand with an attractive, short brunette girl. Wait, I am mixing up threads?

But don't wait till I die to share the pictures.

I think the minimum you should do is pre-pay. It can be done over time.
Unfortunatly, there is already a $4000 bronze marker cast with my x-wife and my names on it... stupid cow.
Guess I should get it out of storage and take the dremmel to it.

Having a power of attorney, will AND a living will is very important.

Just lettin' people know I ain't dead yet. Though, last week I was wishing I was.I'm gonna go back to work tomorrow. I'm out of sick days and vacation and all that so my return is in spite of how I feel. I'll be talkin' to ya all then.Hope there hasn't been to much excitement hatred during my absence. I would hate to think I missed all the fun.

You beat me to it! I logged in to send you a PM.Well glad you at least are not dead, sorry to hear things are not better. I hope things start looking up hun! GIANT HUG

I was just wondering where you were at. Lots of stuff going on here I'd like to see you post on...but only if you're up to it.