Ok, this is a semi-long story, but I really need help! So if you have time, please respond.I work at a family own'd restaurant. Its small and all of the workers are friends and we all fool around with each other and flirt and make jokes. we're just like a restaurant-family. One of the cook's has been flirting with me. He always tells me that I look pretty and he smiles every time we pass each other. When we were by ourselves he told me he liked me and I laughed and said I liked him too but he looked at me and said that he reallyyy liked me. We flirt and he asked me for my number. i dont have a crush on him, its just that he's a nice guy and i like him. Now this doesn't sound like too much of a problem right? Wrong. The big problem is that he's 31, I'm only 16! It wudnt be a problem if I just had the crush but I can't tell if he's serious when he says he likes me and we should hang out. since i gave him my number last saturday he's calles me 5 times. im too nervous to answer the phone so i just ignore it. So first I guess is how do I know if he's serious? Do I just ask? But if I'm attracted to him then should the age difference be a problem? I'm not planning on him being my boyfriend or anything like that, but is it wrong if we like each other? Is it bad if we act on it? HELP ! I'm so conflicted and have no idea what to do!P.S. (i see him friday so any help before then is much appreciated!)
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Age differences
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31 year old lurking on a 16 year old = Something is wrong.Im sorry but this is really shady and dont even think about doing anything with this guy. I would not hang out with him alone if he likes you because a 31 year old guy is not looking for a relationship with a 16 year old girl, hes looking for sex. It means hes too much of a loser to play the field in the major leagues so he went down to little league to try his luck there.
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Short Answer:Yes, it's wrong if you act on it.And I think you know that.If you're 16, I wouldn't recommend dating anyone over 18. Not to mention, any intimate physical contact is illegal in most states past that point.
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Yes, there is something wrong with this. You're only 16, and he's 31? He's almost double your age! If you act on your feelings, it is wrong. The thing is, this man should know better than to be doing this. But at the same time, you're kind of stringing him along by giving him your phone number.
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Are you serious??? Yes, it's wrong...Keep away from this guy.
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Wrong, wrong, WRONG, wrong, Wrong, wronG, WRONg, WrOng, wrong... for both of you. You don't do it and he should know better.Both of you should avoid getting into this kind of shit. It won't end good.
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Thank you all SO much. First, when i told him i liked him, i specifically said "i like you too, you're a good FRIEND." but i've made sure to be wayy more friendly than flirty. so when he invites me to hang out or drive me home i make sure to say no, no matter what.And i didn't know giving him my number was wrong i figured he was just being nice, i never thought he would actually call me! especially 5 times in 4 days!My mom is REALLY protective [for good reason, i was sexually assaulted when i was little] especially about guys and its not like this is a normal situation. so im just scared that if she knew what was going on she'd make me quit. I think when i see him next, (this friday) i should see how he is. but if he's still flirting i dont know what to do! do i just ignore it? the owner of the restaurant is his best friend, but should i say something to my manager? should i say something to him first?thank you all again for everyone's responses.
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reminds me of that song Don't Stand So Close to Me by The Police.
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Originally Posted By: mlassesP4122Thank you all SO much. I think when i see him next, (this friday) i should see how he is. but if he's still flirting i dont know what to do! do i just ignore it? the owner of the restaurant is his best friend, but should i say something to my manager? should i say something to him first? It's quite tricky situation, I suggest you see how he is first, if he makes any more suggestive moves, you should definately not respond and just ignore it and go back to your work, don't smile or acknowledge his behaviour in any way. If he persists, you might want to gently tell him that he's making you slightly uncomfortable, but say it nicely and lightly, don't get aggressive about it. If he STILL dosn't stop talk to your mom. I know you don't want to quit your job but talking to the guy himself any more might be slightly dangerous, going to the manager might be awkward, especially if he's seen you flirting back to the guy, it's not guaranteed that he'll understand.
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h
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after he called me again today, i told my mom everything. she ended up calling him from my phone and saying that he is no longer to call me anymore and talked to him about how he crossed the boundaries. he apologized profusely and said we are just friends. idk how its going to be tomorrow but i guess i'll just have to wait and find out.thanks to everyone again!
