Hey all, I'll describe the situation from the beginning...I met this girl at a club, she was helping out with an event there. I talked to her briefly, and that was that. Next day I found her on Facebook and messaged her. We talked for a while, and she asked to meet somewhere. I was half expecting her to be stuck up, as she is gorgeous, but she is actually really cool and down to earth (cliche, I know) The "date" went really well, she seemed interested in me etc. After seeing her a few more times, I brought up a question that had been bothering me. I knew she had, at least at some point, been involved with a guy that I know. She said (I would say, complained) that they're in an "open relationship". She wasn't happy with the situation, and wanted commitment. They decided to take some time to think about their situation and not see each other for a month or so. I have been seeing her throughout that month now, and the guy is coming back next week, they're supposed to meet to sort things out. Now, I am extremely confused as to what her intentions are for even seeing me...Now...from what I can tell of her, she is not a girl that would see me just to show the guy she was in a relationship with that she can get other guys as well. She basically described the situation and apologized for dragging me into something like that. She told me that it was only fair that I was the one that made the choice to continue seeing her or not...and I decided it was best to keep my options open.We basically do things that are typical of a couple...hold hands in public, she feeds me from her spoon when we get ice cream in a restaurant, walks really close to me on purpose, either puts her head on my shoulder often or just touches me whenever she talks to me. I kissed her the other day, and she responded favorably, but at the same time, the following day she mentioned that "she is afraid that she's doing something wrong". It annoys me quite a bit that I can not (pretty much) influence her decision as to what to do about her "open relationship", as she has seen the other guy for a year compared to me seeing her for a month. And I still have no idea why she does things that I see as being more than friends if she likes the other guy too...I really like this girl, but I'm not sure what kind of feelings she holds towards me, and from her behavior, I can't even tell. We talk basically everyday, but if we talk on the phone, it is always me that calls, she has never been the first one to call. Every time after I see her, I wait a day or two and then ask her out again (for a day a few days ahead, so there's usually 4 or 5 days in between seeing her). Sometimes, she (half jokingly?) responds that she is afraid of taking things too quickly...what does that even mean? Basically at this point in time, I don't know what I should do...continue talking to her? ask her outright what the hell she feels towards me/why she's seeing me? From what it looks, she's basically creating a "safety net" out of me, so if her guy doesn't work out when they meet next week, she has me to fall back on. I do not being a back up at all, nor do I like being used in some sort of game. It's to the point where...if my friends ask about her, I don't even want to talk about her, because our relationship feels so fleeting...Perhaps you wise afraidtoask denizens can help me out.I apologize if all that sounded really really childish...
What to do?
Well It seems like she is leading you on, And then throwing you back in the dirt. Personally if that happend to me I would really keep my options open. I wouldnt get too attached to her cuz there is a chance of you getting hurt by her if you fell for her. That's all I can really think about. sorry I couldnt help much but I hope that did help a little. Hope all works well;=)
Man... I would tell her how you feel before this other joker comes back into the picture...What have you got to lose?