i can't believe i still like him after nearly 10 years of not ever seeing him!
anyway, the other guys i have been hanging out with, turned out to be jerks so i dropped them, but this is my most recent story.
i had the hugest crush on him in 7th grade, but he is one of the most biggest potheads ever. i really don't judge people if they smoke pot, i mean that's their thing but it won't influence me to do it. i'll do it if i want to, not because they forced me to. now, i know my friends say i liked everybody back then, but not liked i like this guy...let's call him MJ...lmfao, the ironic thing is those are his real initials and he is a pothead after all.
i hadn't seen MJ since way before we graduated, maybe sophomore year of high school. two days ago, we randomly bumped into each other after not having seen each other since i previously mentioned, for literally eons. he didn't remember back then at all, nor that we had an english class together in 7th grade, and we are now 22/23 but after i said something about it, he kinda vaguely remembered, but not much.
after not having seen him for so long, i still have those same butterflies that i had when i had the hugest crush on him in 7th grade. i was shocked that i still liked him so much because he never crossed my mind during the time that i didn't ever see him. he didn't give me the time of day back then, but then again, hardly anyone did, cuz i didn't care to impress anyone, just had crushes on them...at the time of 7th grade, i think he knew i liked him then, but since it was so long ago, he forgot that i used to like him.
now, he has noticed me, though. we've actually spent the night with each other twice already and he actually likes spending time with me, i think. the thing is, it's always a pain in the ass to try to get him to hang out with me. last night he said he would come over around midnight or 12:30am, but ended up coming over at 5:30am...because that entire time, he was "smokin' with his homies."
i knew what kind of person he was, the bad boy pothead kind, but still, i like him, and at the same time he can be sweet, i guess there's just something about him...i don't know...i mean he plays too much, but i like teasing with him. should i try to hang out with him more? sometimes he'll respond to me, sometimes he won't. i hate that he always makes plans at a certain time, but then either doesn't follow through, or follows through with them, but 5 hours later.
the thing is, sometimes i think he's ignoring me altogether, but when i try to contact him again the next day he actually responds.
i really really like this guy, regardless if he is a pothead. what should i do or what would you do in this situation when it's so hard to hang out with him? i don't know if i just want to give up or what.
i don't think i could ever officially date him because of him being the biggest pothead ever. but i really like hanging out with him whenever we do hang out.
I can't believe i still like him after...
i can't believe i still like him after nearly 10 years of not ever seeing him!
Potheads like sweets. Maybe you're the candy.
lol see, he did that again yesterday. he ignored me after hanging out with me and after we did it. i even asked him if he thought i was bad when we did it, but he said no he doesn't think that, it was just the house we were in...my cousin's grandma's house...yeah we both felt bad about that but i really wanted him then, and we had to be extremely quiet.
but then today, i only texted him just to see if he would respond or ignore me again, and he actually responded back. he said he was busy but would get back with me later...whatever that means. ugh.
Do you ever hang out without having sex?
lol yeah. depends on who i'm hanging out with.
okay just making sure, I couldn't figure out how many times you had spent time together from your post, as you only mentioned that you'd slept together a couple of times.
I get the feeling that he's just after a fuck-buddy... would you be happy being that?
i would totally be fine with it :). i don't think we could ever be exclusive anyway because he's not good enough for me to be exclusive with (considering his lifestyle, but okay to have a lil fun with) so no one would get hurt. but fuck buddy yes.
we had both said we aren't looking for a relationship and just having fun and i'm down with that. i think it would be great with him considering i still apparently have the hugest crush on him which would make the sex even better, haha.
it's just that he's hard to reach sometimes, and like pot is basically his life. so should i still try to hang out with him?
we fooled around only twice so far, but had sex once. and the time that he hung out with me, he said he would be at my place around midnight or 12:30am, but he ended up showing up at like 5:30am. that's what kinda bugs me about him is that he'll say a time but he'll either show up hours later or not show up at all.
It is entirely up to you whether you try to hang out with him or not.
He seems similar to someone I know... if my impressions of him are correct, when you make yourself readily available he won't bother with you as much.. likewise, if you back off and seem uninterested, he will be all over you. People like this are really not good for you.
You obviously have feelings for him, because you've said have a crush on him, and it bothers you when he doesn't get back in contact or doesn't stick to the plans he made with you. You can say that noone would get hurt - but in the end it will hurt you, because you're already in too deep... and I'm pretty sure, at some point, you will regret it. For fuck buddies to work, there needs to be literally no feelings at all (bar sexual attraction!)
I don't want to see you willingly get hurt by someone. I've been there, and it's not nice... but if you do choose to do it, we're still here to help you through!
Thank you Amz. I'm not sure if he really is always busy or if he's just postponing to hang out with me, but the last text he sent said that he apologized for always being so busy, but he would text me when he can.
So I think for now I might just wait to see if he does call back. Luckily I'm starting this job in a few days to hopefully get my mind off of texting him.
Because I usually text him when I'm bored and have nothing to do just to see if he'll still respond.
I will definitely update you if he gets back with me like he says.
Update! I think he is truly busy like he says he is because last night, he texted me about 2am asking what I was doing. I had texted him earlier that day, but not to hang out, just to talk.
And so when he texted me at night, I asked if he wanted to come over and he did.
Is it normal for fuck buddies to kiss each other good bye like we are girlfriend and boyfriend? Could he possibly like me for more than that?
Or do most fuck buddies just say bye after that and then leave?
Seriously he sounds exactly like the guy I know. Yes, it's known for them to kiss eachother goodbye... not sure if that is just a mind game thing to keep the other person interested, and hoping there is more to it than just fuck buddies...?
He might like you more than that. But you did say you only wanted fuck buddies
lol. I'm going with the flow, just as long as he doesn't ignore me all together. :P if he decides to change his mind, i will be up for it. after he left my house last night, he told me to text him tonight. hmm, i wonder if he'll be busy or come over today. hehe.
Is there a way where i can beat him at his own game, but still keep him around?
Just want to throw my two pennies in here and ask you a hypothetical question.
You say you would be up for it if he did want more than fuck buddies, so it seems like you do like him more than just physically.
Similarly you say you'd be fine if it just remained as fuck buddies. I'm not sure if I buy that but I'll give you the benefit of the doubt.
So how would you feel if he started sleeping with other girls as well? After all, it's only fuck buddies.
How about if he started seeing another girl and got into a relationship. How would you deal with that?
Think about it. Do you like that feeling? Because if you feel bad about it like I expect you do, perhaps you better make your feelings clear to him because it sounds like he does not see you in the same way.
Essentially what I'm saying is that it sounds like you're on a one-way train to heartache and need to do something to put you back on the right track before you hit the end of the line...
I don't mean to bring up an old topic, but I am in a very similar situation and would like to know how this one maybe panned out.
I currently have a fuck buddy who is also a major pothead, that I had a large crush on in the past as well (and happens to be an aquarius, if you're into that sort of thing). Fortunately for me, I soon learned that this guy, although incredibly gorgeous, smart, ambitious, driven, rich, polite, sexy, and athletic ... was also horrible at communicating, being reliable (he stood me up more than 3 or 4 times), and being open to other ideas and cultures (i'm into art, he's into sports, you get the idea). So my crush turned into a friend with benefits/fuck buddy and I am perfectly fine by it.
The thing is in terms of the unreliability... that is VERY typical of potheads, especially those who sell it and have a lot of "friends" that he smokes with or that use him or buy from him, etc. Their 'business hours' are when ever they see fit. I thought it was fun for a while, I like me a bad boy and he actually became more reliable since I threatened to stop seeing him... but in reality, it is a dangerous and dumb thing to get involved with. Half of the time we hung out as friends he barely remembers conversations or specific things about me. He is still really horrible about ignoring me, or calling me back. Usually pot heads will be involved with other things also. I am also glad this man did not become my boyfriend because he got involved with other drugs... and alcohol is never out of his hands. I don't mind, we're both in college and like to have our 'fun', but it is very difficult emotionally to tell what he is after.
For instance, one night he was yelling my name at my window at 4 a.m., begging to just see me. Another night he kissed me without any other move at all, just a sweet kiss. Another time, asked me to lunch the next day and then stood me up because he was "so drunk that he forgot... but um, probably meant it at the time."
Point is, if you think that you are more into him than he is into you, might as well drop it. But if you are resilient and can deal with unpredictability, and have enough confidence in yourself to know when to move on, then go for it and have fun.
Now my issue is I need to figure out how to drop him as a fuck buddy because I am in a real, loving relationship.
Hey, it's alright that this topic was brought up again. I just got tired of him standing me up all the time so I just started to ignore him.
He would say he's on his way over but never shows up, eventually I grew sick of it and ignored him completely without responding anymore.