Church

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I've been raised to believe that since God created man he must have a sense of humor. So I'm living my life with the belief that if I am a good person and treat others justly that even though I don't go to church and essentially "believe in him" that when I die nothing bad will happen.I do feel bad being at church because I feel like a fake. The people there truly belong there. They want to be there because they truly believe and I don't.I know my parents love me and would still love me even if I told them I was agnostic. If anything they would feel as if they have let me down, which they haven't. Belief in God is based on faith which I have very little of in anything as it is.I believe there is something. Whether it is God or fate or some other sort of thing.And the tears are not so much of sorrow. If they were I would understand it. I'm completely fine one second and the next in tears. It's only gotten worse recently because now I get anxious when I go into church because it has happened so many times.I talked to my mom about it the other day and before I could even mention the tears she said that she has had to leave in the middle of service because she bursts into tears before. I have never seen this. I assumed I was the only one who did this.Being in the south this isn't really something that we talk about . And I'm sure if someone around here found out they'd try to drown me in holy water to get the devil out.

Church ought to be especially for the people who don't feel like they belong there. Unfortunately, as in web forums, there's a tendency for the old hands to feel so comfortable there that others feel in comparison like outsiders.

Aww boo boo =( I used to have this problem. Well actually, the first time I walked into church, by the second song I was bawling. But that's because I had alot of crap going on in my life. I find that I'm usually joyful and at peace at church because everyone there feels like my family. I used to HATE church and God and especially Christians. It was a load of bologne to me. But certain things happened in my life that made me realize I need Him. I know exactly that feeling of overwhelmed. But it's probably different from yours. Usually when I'm disconnected from God (like the past couple of weeks) I feel burdened and uncomfortable and I want to leave. Sometimes... crying and letting it all out is the best thing to do, depending on what it is. Maybe there's something in yourself you haven't dealt with that keeps getting to you and the holy presence is making you feel indifferent (if that makes sense). I'm just guessing from my own experiences.In short, I usually cry when I'm not right with God. Personally, I could live without other Christians or church or whatever. But God I can't. Learned that the hard way =/

Quote:Church ought to be especially for the people who don't feel like they belong there. Unfortunately, as in web forums, there's a tendency for the old hands to feel so comfortable there that others feel in comparison like outsiders. wow... that's pretty deep but very true.

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How could you dislike church, God, and Christians. What was so wrong that you didn't like them. When it comes to God, church and Christians, I really dislike the word "hate" used against them.
Um.. you know I DID say "USED TO" meaning BEFORE I got saved... I had my reasons especially with what was going on in my life at the time. I'm sorry if "hate" offends you but I was only being honest with how I felt at the time.

Honestly, you have been on my case WAY too much lately. I didn't say I feel disconnected from God. In fact, I put it in clear form that that was how I USED to feel. Not now. I'm in the right place with God right now. And to be quite frank, I don't appreciate you coming at me like this like I'M in the wrong. That I need to change myself and DO THIS and DO THAT. I have a MOTHER who tells me what to do. I don't need someone else. Honestly, like I said, I'm sorry I don't talk to you alot. I've had alot of college applications to finish, papers for school, yearbook and work. I come on here for a couple minutes to see what the buzz is about and then I leave. You used to be a really caring and nice friend but now you're getting out of control and from the messages you've been leaving me I am VERY OFFENDED. And I DON'T appreciate how you speak down to me. You have NO IDEA what I've been dealing with lately. I don't feel the need to tell everyone my business like that. And I AM at a great place with God. Please stop talking to me like a I'm a child who knows nothing and needs to be disciplined. I AM happy. And with all the crap I've been going through I happen to think I'm handling things quite well. I'm back on track with working and helping my mom financially. I'm staying focused on school. Balancing my priorities and most importantly I'm trying to maintain stress free.

So as much as I love you as a brother... you really need to BACK OFF.

TMI. That should have been saved for a PM.

I think you need to go see your doctor. I think it goes beyond you just crying at church. You may be suffering from depression.

Get over it.Armondo, I'll send you an email.

Originally Posted By: Ineligible

Church ought to be especially for the people who don't feel like they belong there. Unfortunately, as in web forums, there's a tendency for the old hands to feel so comfortable there that others feel in comparison like outsiders.

Thank you for this thought. I will keep it in mind next time I'm in church. I think it might help.

You don't ever need to worry about feeling a "fake" or anything like that - that's why church is there, to help us all along the way. I'm about to start training as a preacher, and I get doubts and worries and insecurities about God all the time! But God's love sees through all that, and He will see you through this too.Try going to a different church for a while, where you can start afresh and meet new people. Tell them you're a bit lost about faith and be open about the fact you're agnostic. If they are a true Christian people, they will accept this and welcome you with open arms.I also agree with the above that it would be worth speaking to your doctor about things, just to rule out the possibility of depression or something similar.If you're into reading, the book "Messy Spirituality" by Mike Yaconelli is fantastic at dealing with the very issue of feeling down about church.Praying for you.

Great advice!!