So I am 25 years old and always dated guys but once I started my job in January a 28 year old girl really intrigued me. I have found myself attracted to her and I know that she is a lesbian. As I was new to the company I got invited out to the bar, I was nervous because I did not know anyone really but she came up to me and started grinding on me and smiling while looking into my eyes. I was shocked at this point and did not know how to react, the next thing I knew she was making out with some other girl. One day we were discussing this girl I know who always flirts with me and she made the comment that she could not tell if I was gay or not and stated that I broke her gaydar. We were not really friends at this point but we were on the same softball team and before every game we would go out to eat and get drinks with another coworker. At softball she always told me that I was the best one there and what a great job I was doing. She also touches my arm a lot and playfully touched my neck to show how cold her hands are. The thing is I am kind of shy and when I see her at work it is hard for me to talk to her because I do not want her to feel awkward at work. I can talk to her fine in a group/text/e-mail but when it is just the two of us I get nervous and I don’t know why because I am probably the loudest friendliest person ever but when she’s around I get nervous and quiet. We make small talk at work but most of our conversation comes from text message. I will add that I always have to initiate the conversation and it takes her a while to respond. I asked her to talk one day face to face alone but with our busy schedules we never got around to it so I texted her and told her that we should talk and she guessed right away that her “gaydar was right.” I told her I was interested and she said that she is really “f-ed up” (her girlfriend broke up with her like a year ago because she cheated on her) and that this is all new to me and I needed to explore and experiment and have a few lesbian hook ups first. A few weeks later I straight up asked her if I stood a chance and she it’s not that this is all new to you and like I told you I am “f-ed up” but she thinks I am really cool but too quiet. One night I went with a few close friends to a gay bar and when she found out she was really excited and asked my friend to give her details. We were texting one night and we both were out drinking (at different places) and she was talking about how she was going to take some girl home that night, I told her she was supposed to take me home not other girls and she laughed and asked where I was, I told her (I was about a 30 minute drive) and she said damn to far. The next morning I texted her while I was at my other job and asked her about her hook up she said she just talks a big game and she is not really like that, then she asked me about my night and I told her I hooked up with a female friend. She was really excited that I was no longer a “lesbian virgin” and kept texting me and when I saw her at work on Monday morning she was all smiles towards me and very talkative. I asked her the other day if we are friends and she said yeah we are cool but I feel like I make you uncomfortable. I told her I was awkward around her because I told her how I felt and I never got an answer out of her (she tells me I need to hook up or explore and when I do I get no response from her) and it was awkward before all this because I was afraid to tell her. We were making small talk the other day via text of course and I said we should hang out next week and for her to think about it and she never responded, that was two days ago. I really like her and I think she likes me too but I am unsure. I told her how I felt but she never gives me a straight answer. Lately she has been a little more chatty and smiling at me and we went out in a group she invited me and I said I was going to go and then something came up and I said I did not think I could make it and she was really upset and when I actually showed up she smiled at me but did not really talk to me. I guess I want to know if she is interested, playing hard to get or just screwing with me? Any help is appreciated!
Is she interested or screwing with me?
Welcome to A2A, HockeyChick22. From what you describe, it doesn't seem to me that she is all that seriously keen on you, I'm afraid. It seems like she was flirting, and likes you as a friend, but doesn't want it to get too serious.
sounds like she likes you as a friend from how you described it...