hey...i am an african american male, and at the tender age of 15, i have experienced more than i would want...About 2 years ago, i met a girl who i will call "Kim". Me and Kim liked eachother from the very beginning she was sweet, and beautiful, but loved them bad...and i was bad, rough, but handsome, and kind... We lost contact not long after our meeting, however abotu a year l8er, our paths would cross...I was still young and generally inocent, while she was bad, but still a bit inocent as well...this time, we dated, and after about 5 weeks we broke up... ne ways...as luck would have it...we again ran into eachother...she was no longer bad, and now, was stopping her ways, she was clean, or almost clean...we've become close close close friends since that day...and fone eachother all the time to talk for hours on end...she says she will always be there for me...and im stuck with her nomatter what...she has recently helped me quit smoking, and also my addiction to many drugs, including encounters with Heroin...still...i feel she is somehow playing me...there are many other guys in her life...and even though im not her boyfriend...i am really jealous...i dont even want to think about her and someone else...Recently...i went to her house to see her, after she had been in a serious fight...and had suffered a damage to her kidney, after taking a bullseye hit... After massaging her side, and rubbing the doctor-prescribed solution onto it...we watched a movie...called "The Basketball Diares" a movie recommended by her drug dealer brother, about a herion addict, who survived the streets...it was then...with her head on my lap, and my hand in her hands...i realised i trully loved her...and that i knew it was not mutual...she says she wants to go out with me after shes better, and im better, but...i know she often changes her mind...and doesnt know what she wants...wtf should i do...tell her how i feel? this i dont exactly want to do...it will be awkward...and im sure she knows it enough already...any advice would be very helpful...even someone to talk to would be nice right about now...thank you for your time
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Ghetto Gurl
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Since she has said she wants to go out with you when she is better, why not tell her you want to too? Something may come of it, or it may not, but why not give it a try. You both care about each other, and that means so much. You don't have to be blindingly in love; see how you get on now. You'll both have changed a bit since a year ago.
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well...its an extremely hard situation to explain...she knows i have always liked her, and have never stopped, she CLAIMS she has always liked me...but i dunno...she goes out with alot of guys....yet, she always makes me feel special, and i try to push all those other guys into the corner of my mind...im hoping right now that when shes better she'll bring it up...but i KNOW she wont...i know i will...and that could tend to be uncomfortable...also, i dont want her to date me just because she made a promise.. so its hard...if only i knew what that girl was thinking :smirk:
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It's very easy to get into a complete tangle when both sides try to guess what the other side is thinking and do what they think the other person wants. I think it's much better if you can both be honest with each other.
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yea man, i know what you meen...i decided to give your post a bit of thought..and while lying in bed last night i realised u might be on to something...i really DONT know what the hell is going on her head...no matter what she says...she IS very unpredictable...for example...on saturday i went to her house as i said...and she just lay her head on my lap and took my hand in hers...without me doing or saying ne thing...then she found this poem i wrote about her titled "eyes of an angel" (i like to write...its the only thing that keeps me sane sometimes) and u was so happy she almost cried...and she sed she would never stop loving me...for as long as she lived...yet...now, i havent heard from her 4 the last 3 days!!! not even a fone call...this coming from a girl who phoned me 3 times a day....:S...i kindoff dont want to confront her about it so soon tho...it might jsut make a bad situation worse...im waiting for her to fone...and then i know i didnt screw up somehow...and then when shes better and i am 100% drug free...im going to tell her how much i like her...and not ask her out...but plainly lay it on the table...telling her that i dont want her to go out with me because she said she would....
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sorry for typos...im very bad at not proof reading my posts
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People can be unpredictable, but the problem comes when we make assumptions how they are thinking from how they are acting. We think, "If I were doing that, it would mean I was thinking such-and-such . . .". We don't make enough allowance for the fact that other people are different, and don't have all the same habits and character and personality and way of thinking that we do. This girl might have times when she phones a lot and times when she keeps to herself, but she may not love you any less when she keeps to herself, it might just be a more "down" mood.Don't feel you have to wait for her to call you. Perhaps she's waiting for you to call her. Don't worry about screwing up - we all do that a lot, but we don't have to be perfect, and if we wait to be perfect we'll never do anything. So you don't have to be 100% drug free to tell her you like her. You're not perfect, but you're a good guy as you are.
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yea, i know what youre saying...and personally it seems the longer i go without talking to her, the more i think up what she is "thinking" its better to just phone her up and lay it all down on the table...and it shouldnt matter if im completely clean for she was in the same situation as i was less than 1/2 a year ago...She did email me today saying she was sorry for not phoning, and that she'll always love me...so i dont think im going to lose anything if i ask her to actually be more than a friend...theres also the problem of how i dont go to her school, and although i trust her and w.e, i know she must mess around with a bunch of guys...i just try to push it out of my mind...now that is something i can confront her about though...only if she tells me she wants to be with me...i just dont want to seem protective...if anybody likes freedom its her... but yea, what you say makes good sense...this weekend for sure..hehe..