Good Morning,I really don't know how to begin this post, but i hope it all comes together and generate many replies because for that i will be greatful. Okay, I was put into foster care when i was 6 do to the fact that both of my parents where drug addicts. My mom heroin(spelling?) and my dad crack. Through out the years(now 21) i've kept in contact with both my parents and both are still addicts, my dad is a functional user because he has a home, car, next job, and good family, but he still uses. My mom, well let's just say i don't think she's every owned anything since i've been around. And because of this i decided not to do drugs NEVER, will let's just say never say never. I moved to south florida last year when i was 20 and up until that time i never smoked a cigarrett(spelling), blunt,drank an alcoholic bev, or anything that i felt that could led me down my parents path. Well, my first roommate introduced me to coke...so i'm think yeah whatever whatever, then x and i'm still like cool.However, I would say up until the last three months i didn't partake in either much. Now i've found myself buying an 8 ball every weekend, now one thing i don't do and will not do is buy if i know i have a bill due. I have a pretty decent job and wonderful boyfriend and with both i can pay my bills with my first week's earnings.So because of that i don't feel bad, but this is every weekend and when i party i typically party by myself just because of the fact i like to be by myself. Sometimes i end up feeling like shit and other times i tell myself that it's not like i'm pawning shit and looking hard for it and i for one have always believe that addicts are mental and because i've always been a strong-minded person that i would never get into deep. Like i said it's like a battle of good and evil...so i was wondering should i stop myself while i'm ahead or should i continue to party as long as all of my obligations are met??? Of course finally decision is up to me, but i would like to know what's your views on this situation, and if anyone know people who live regular lives, but party on the weekends,days,once a month, or whatever.
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I was wondering.....
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Stop while you're ahead (however I don't consider you ahead right now). You're seriously endangering your life.
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I so agree with Amanda, after knowing exactly what it can do to you, via your parents, how the hell did you let yourself get into this situation? Sorry that sounded soooo judgemental!
If you feel you are ahead then stop now, do you want your kids if you ever have them to go into care.....i know there is one thing in this life that is more important than me and thats my children! -
Of course i don't want my kids to go into care If i ever had any. I'm 21 and i'm not having kids anytime soon. Anyway, thanks for the comments. I'm not making excuses for myself b/c i know what i'm doing is wrong to my body. But like i said this is only recently that i've started doing this....i don't know. I've always considered addictions as a mental problem, meaning it's all in your mind that you NEED the drug and i just feel like my mind will not allow me to take it that far. Since i've posted the first time i haven't used and this because i simple read my own post over and over again and thought about the money (150 bucks) i was wasting when that could have been going into my savings account. So thanks for your replies really appreciate but no worries, i'll be okay because i don't wanna end up like my parents. Curiousity Killed The Damn Cat.