Lately I have been feeling realy tired. I get plenty of sleep and excercise. I had a physical and blood work done and they can't find anything wrong with me that would make me so tired. Any thoughts?
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Feeling tired
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Do you suffer from any physical or mental problems?
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but then your "adopted son" takes a lot out of you, physicaly and emotionaly. It's bound to have an effect on you sooner or later. If I'm thinking of the wrong person, disregard above lol
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No mental problems. But I do suffer from migrains. I have been getting them a lot lately.
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That is so true. Between him and my other son. I guess its catching up to me.
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my dad tells me all the time i'm making his hair go gray b4 his time, lol.... do u have glasses or contacks? i had bad headaces like migrans and it was cuz i needed glasses. got some contacks and things are better. but then when i get stresses i get stomich problums sooooo it could be that too. i don't know. but b4 i got glasses and contacks i got a headace every day.
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Certain situations and stressful environments can cause you to become very tired.Diver, you are a very perceptual person.
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I have reading glasses but I don't use them. However I was diagnosed with TMJ 6 years ago which can cause migrains. But now it weems that nothing is working for the pain. I need something stronger.
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I agree, websex. Diver is very perceptive; it is one of his great strengths.Stress is work - much harder work that it seems. It can exhaust you, and you need a break from time to time. Perhaps occasionally you could leave your nephew with a trusted friend or relative for the day.
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This has been playing on my mind since I read your post... lol lost sleep last night as usual lol
I don't really know anything about TMJ (temporomandibular joint disorder) but found this web-site that "may be of use" http://www.ctds.info/tmj.html
About the migraines, I often suffer with both "stress" and "light influenced" migraines. The stress is hard enough to handle but the "light influenced" come on from being around florescent lightings from shops, offices or and even around the home.
I wear glasses all the time due to this (and the fact I'm blind as a bat without them lol) and to help "treat the cause" of light influenced migraines I have permanent dark tint lenses. Since going over to this method of treatment, I suffer a quarter as much as I used to.I totally and whole-heartedly agree with what Ineligible said (and was going to mention it myself lol).
Everyone needs "own time" whether it is by yourself or with your wife. It has also got to put a lot on your relationship. Maybe you can work out a time each day or a few days each week when you can each plan an activity for him where one of you can take him out to give the other a break, and again as Ineligible said. Even a trusted friend or mutual friend of you nephew can have him for a little while.
The only thing I would stress to you if you do decide that you could put him in someone else's care, is NOT to tell him why, as this could do more damage for his self confidence than anything else.
Something I've also been wondering is if he has seen anyone for the possibility that he may had ADD (Attention Defect Disorder) or ADHD (Attention Defect Hyperactivity Disorder).
I know you said in an earlier post that you can't get him to see a counsellor, but maybe you could discuss things with your doctor over the phone and then take him under the intense of having a physical or something.
I know people are always saying bad things about "drug treatment and drug therapy" for "younger" children, but it may just be something that can help him chill and relax a bit and slow down some of his "anxiety".
This is something I always like to suggest, and have seen good results from.
Have you thought of taking up a hobby with him? Something that he would need to put trust in to someone? SCUBA diving is great for doing that. It is a hobby/sport where communication both above and underwater is a key and trust is paramount. I know it's not the most practical hobby to take up, but maybe something along those lines.
Sorry for making this post long and including a reply to your other thread, but I thought I would get it all over in one lol
Let us know how you get on, oh and it's a bit late now but anyways... Welcome to the board lol
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Uh.... yeaaaaah.... You must have lost sleep by the look of your post. lol.
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When things just get in my mind it's hard to get them out again... hence the unusually long post for me lol
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I could leave him with someone for the day, but its not just him. My mother has MS and is in a wheelchair. My father is out of work and is runnung out of money fast. Husband is on disability. From having back surgery. And im looking for a new job because my current one just cut hours. And I presses charges against my own sister for assault and battery. I just have way too much stress.I have been thinking that maybe he does have ADD or ADHD. He is very very hyper. And can't concentrate on anything.
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okay... lmao I should really take notice when reading peoples posts for determining sexes lmao sorry I do apologise lmaoI would strongly suggest you try to get him to see someone professional to determine if something needs to be done.I can understand that he must be afraid to talk to people about the things that have happened to him in the past. I know and understand that when people are physically and mentally abused in the past have also been threatened not to talk to other people about the things that have happened, I would have thought that he also has it in his mind that if he “tells” he will be taken away also.Something you could try is getting him to write “letters” about what happened, that is if he is unwilling to talk to people. I have suggested that to many people and for most it is an easier way to communicate out their feelings and fears.It’s hard in these situations to understand fully what goes through those peoples mind, who have been mistreated for so long. But I’m sure that in time he will learn to trust others again.I’ve been thinking also about youth support groups, after school activities or even scouts. Without knowing about him, it’s hard really to suggest things that could occupy his mind and get him out and about. Things that obviously are better for the “trust” side of things would be close teamwork activities, so he can learn to trust others again.I’m very sorry to hear about your family’s situation regarding ill health, but you really need to step back from a few things and not try to take everything onboard yourself. I can understand how you must feel with your mother’s ill health and your father being out of work, but you can’t bog yourself down with what is happening with them (as hard as it may sound), they are old enough to look after themselves.Trying to find work in this day and age can be very frustrating and stressful in itself, all I can really suggest to you is that you talk to your doctor about what’s happening. It may be that he could prescribe you an anti-depressant to just let you relax a little. This course of action is nothing to be afraid of or even suggesting to your doctor about. Many, many people take them in this day and age.
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I had to move in with my parents to help take care of mom. She was on life support for 4 weeks. I try not to take everything on myself. I told my parents that I do not want to know about their finances. My adopted son is also very jealous of my son. Because he see's me being there for my son and his mother was never there for him. That is the hard thing. What do I tell him about that?
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Rivalry like this is bound to happen, likewise is going to happen to your son if he sees you spending more time with his cousin. All you can really do is sit down with them both and try to make them understand what is going on and that you care for them both. Perhaps “special” time for each could do the trick (although I’m sure you’ve already tried that) and “planned activities” for each.The main problem is that this lad has more or less “self taught” himself that no one loves or cares for him, but at the same time will wreck and be naughty to “gain attention” (as I’m sure you have seen). It is going to be a long time for him to get to trust anyone, but keep reminding him that you have taken him away from the pain and hurt. I know it’s hard to say but he will understand in a fashion.Another thing that is going to be hard to do is punishing him when he is bad, send him to his room, take things away that he treasures. It is hard especially because of his history, but at the same time you can’t let him walk all over you. And what ever punishment you give, needs to be supported. I’m not trying to tell you how to suck eggs or trying to say anything about your parenting and these things you probably already do. But at the same time, he does need to know where the boundaries lye.As for you, it is going to be tough, and things will probably get worse before they get better, but I’m sure in the end things will work out fine. But in the mean time, have a chat to the doctor, and make sure you get some time for yourself (and your husband).If you ever need to vent off or just unload some shit, you know where we are.
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jclark, with all that happening, I'm impressed that you are able to keep going on at all.
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Thank you. You always know just the right thing to say. That helps a lot. And I do do all those things already. It is hard but I just got to get myself through it.
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Hell, im surprised I can keep going. Its really hard. But I just keep going some how.
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Ok, I have another question. What do I say to my nephew when he says "im stupid"? He says it all the time. I am sooo sick of hearing that. He is not stupid. Sure he has two D's in school but that is just because he doesn't complete and turn in homework. Every night he argues when its time for bed. He will do anything he can to stay up late. I take away things that he likes like his gameboy and that doesn't seem to help.