I hate to sound dramatic, but I think I am officially depressed. If nothing is going right in my life, then nothing is going on in my life. I'm about to complain, so bear with me. I actually have gotten to the point where I go to sleep at night and I hope I dont wake up. But when I do wake up, the extreme feeling of dread comes over me and I cant stop crying. Ive cried for the past week. Every day is pointless and meaningless to me and all these days have clustered into a pointless life. When school was in, I was going to counseling. I'd tried to be hopeful and optimistic about the summer. I went and applied for I job I really wanted and signed up for summer school. The job called me back for two interviews and told me that I would get a call with my work schedule. I waited for two weeks and called them. The manager didnt know who i was and put me on hold for 15 minutes. Then someone else got on the phone and told me she would call me back. That was over two weeks ago. Everytime I think about that, I cry because that is so rude and unprofessional and I wanted to work thre so bad. It ruins plans for an internship and a potential job with that company. I wanted that job to distract myself from the fact that I lost a guy I wanted to be with. It hurts because I know Ill never see him again. That is pretty what my life has always been a disappointment. That is what the future looks like to me. And if that's what life is going to be like, then I dont want to live it. Seriously. Something or someone holds the key to my happiness and that bothers the hell out of me.
Pointless and meaningless life
You do sound depressed.
In reply to:
Something or someone holds the key to my happiness and that bothers the hell out of me.
Others can make our life more difficult, but that doesn't mean we should let them hold the key. In this case, you've been treated unprofessionally. Don't wait two weeks for a call back, especially a second time. If they don't call the next day you should call them and remind them. "I'll call you back" is the great business lie. (Amazingly, I've dealt with salesmen who wouldn't call back to take an order.)
In any case it doesn't look like that company is going to get its act together. That's their loss. Shake the dust from your feet, and apply to other places. Work at the summer school. Disappointment is (unfortunately) a feature of life, but it doesn't mean all of life is like that. Good things happen that you never expected, too.
They ruined everything. They shoulddn;t have even called me if they were going to do this to me. And what upsets me the most is that it's not like I was trying out for the FBI, it was a clothing store. I applied to 15 other places and no one else called me back. I've had jobs before and always hated them and dreaded going to them. This was the first job I was excited about because it dealt with my major. This was the only thing I was looking forward to this summer because there is nothing else going on in my life (as usual). I know it sounds silly and dramatic, but my life is full of disappointment. I never get excited about anything because this always happens. And really I can only take so much more disappointment.
I felt a little like that before i had my kids, I think i was born to be a mother LOL But what did help for me was becoming a scout leader, you get SO much back from the boys, and my diary is full of outings, picnics, training and weeks out camping to fit in between study and the kids.........theres nothing quite like one of the kids who maybe doesn't have the best home life and who you see feels unloved, coming and saying "your the best, thanks for a great day out" Maybe doing something like that would give you something else to feel good about............ </font color>
Get a taste of Old Time Religion..........lick a witch grin<br />
i know exactly how you feel,depression is a gift not a curse,yet its a desease and not ecstacy
i turned into the man,that you never knew.but i wouldnt be this way,if it werent for you....a hundred thank yous.if this is love...then judies are ...
You'll have a lot of disappointments when it comes to jobs. I've applied to jobs I really wanted and been called back for a second interview and even a third and in the end I wouldn't get the job...it happens. You just have to keep pursuing.
~*~Smile, it's the second best thing you can do with your mouth.~*~
i know what you mean, i dont really know how to explain it but if your mind is busy and full of activity like angel said, you tend not to dwell on the little details that make you feel sad so much, you cant let others control you, youve got to make it happen for yourself, pull yourself together, and i dont mean that in a nasty tone at all, really get real and face it because you cant mope around all the time