Beware the white text!
--consider that your disclaimer.
Thank you all for your input. But I still feel you are the minority of people who try or succeed at LD relationships.
...and I was mainly asking the women, because where I live, it's only the females I've met, who have military boyfriends serving overseas. All the male service members are more of the mentality of, "fuck that, I'm gonna be single while I'm over there so I can do whatever I want..." I think it makes a little bit of sense, being that a lot of guys are sexually driven, if they can't be physical with their female significant others, then what's the point of the relationship...
..is how it's perceived.
Also, forgot to add, that it seems like the few who have answered were or are in pre-existing relationships for some time before the distance started. One of you was 7 months? Yeah...I'm referring more to people who are together for maybe 2-3 weeks before the distance starts. That's not enough time to develop "love" for said person, honestly. If someone came on here spouting "I love him/her...we've been dating for 2 weeks" many if not all would call BS. Jus' sayin.
Disclaimer: I have mucho respect for our service members. Mother retired after 24+ years of Active Duty.
Here we go. This question is very, very simple. However the answer may not be. I pose this mainly for the females, as they are the only ones I've seen do this.
Why, oh why, do people believe it is a good idea to get into a long distance relationship? What I'm referring to is this: I've seen three of my good female friends get into relationships with a guy in another state (TN and WA), or a member of the military who is going overseas. It's fairly common for soldiers to go over to Iraq for 6 to 9 months, and have their tours extended because of problematic rotation schedules amongst units. So why choose to get involved in something like that?
I have not been able to find a good answer for this. If you'd be so kind.
Arguments will get this thread closed, so please be respectful.
In short, yes. They are a waste of time.
In long? Not if you're married or deeply, deeply committed. Deeply committed does not come in a month or two weeks or something.
This has something that has puzzled me for a while.
nevermind...I'll make a new thread.
Why do so many females allow past relationships THAT ARE DONE to enter in and intervene with future relationships? Does that make ANY sense, whatsoever?
Just have fun with dude, fer serious. Don't worry about making a good impression, y'all are way passed that stage. Just relax, be comfortable and get busy...serious.
It's a respect thing.
Fixing up a family member with a best friend is a conscious choice.
Having your best friend go behind your back and sleep with your family member is disrespectful to most people. There are 3 billion other people out there to choose from.
Everyone says that the OP overreacted.
I disagree. My story is relevant in the fact that even though what people do is their own business, that doesn't mean you have to like their decisions. Far too often, many people say, "It's my life, I do what I want...deal with it!" I was only pointing out that NO, in fact I don't have to deal with it; and neither does the OP.
How the OP reacted to hearing about the sexual acts that went on between her friend and her brother is in no way overreacting. Why? Because it's her choice to act how she wants, when she comes up to a situation like the one she is currently in.
In other words, her reaction is perfectly fine, and she's not overreacting.
and about the terms: "whore/slut" is what people tend to call girls with healthy sexual appetites. I was only stating that my decision to not date her was not based on the idea that most people would call her a "whore/slut" for said appetite.
edit: No I wouldn't cut off my friends for having sex, as long as it wasn't a moral issue.
If a relative was having sex, no. If the relative was immoral about it, then possibly. I don't strongly dislike many things, but immoral acts such as cheating, I borderline hate. I'm not perfect nor would I condemn them as being dreadful human beings...but I can make a conscious choice to disassociate from them.
I'm gonna take the opposite stance.
Although it IS their personal business, YOU have a 100% legitimate reason for not wanting to engage in conversation or pursuing a relationship with your friend. Your brother is family, not much you can do there, but you CAN choose your friends.
Just because someone does something that they can live with and be 100% satisfied with, does not mean you have to live in that reality.
For example: My ex broke up with me for religious reasons. Later on, through conversation it was discussed that she had had sex with numerous guys, who for lack of a better phrase, were much less devout in religion than I/we are. So, now after having been hurt by these guys that used her, she decided that I was the appropriate man for her and she wants me back.
I refuse to date her again simply because of the numerous partners she had after me. Now I'm not judging her as a "slut"/"whore" as those two words are not in my vocabulary. However, just because she can live with her decisions, does not mean I have to, too. Therefore, we shall remain platonic.
blackmanoncampusOriginally Posted By: ColimonHey again peoples! I was just thinking... If I'm 17, where should I draw the age line for people I date? People have been telling me that anyone in highschool can date anyone in highschool, but I'm just not sure... I'm asking this because I may want to ask a grade 9 out next year, and I would feel extremely weird doing it if that's not acceptable.
Stick to the upper grades next year. There's a big mental/emotional difference in a 9th grader than a junior or senior. Remember only last year they were in middle school lol.Originally Posted By: Virtual_StarOriginally Posted By: ColimonI'm asking this because I may want to ask a grade 9 out next year
Why next year? If you turn eighteen soon, or by next year, then there are definitely lines you can't cross. I suppose dating is fine, but NEVER do anything sexual. You'll get in serious trouble.
lol which means it will be a boring relationship.
again...walk away. lol that response is not congruent to someone who wants to show you interest, man. It was good that you lined up some stuff with your buddies :). Good call.
ignore her for a few days...yes, girls like being chased...so you do the exact opposite...make her chase you.