I know I need to trust her, I just can't get comfortable with the idea of her being away by herself. Guessing the best way is to explain my fears to her, and through that maybe secure my insecurities and all. Or just wait it out, I think I may still be getting used to not being with her, and the loss of my job probably didn't help either.
But I appreciate all the help, I'm trying not to listen to some of the more negative things. Cos I know its a load of shit, just by judging his character.
I may as well post an update here.
She left on boxing day, been about a week now and we're sending daily emails to one another. Haven't called her yet due to her being on a mountain somewhere without signal, but it sounds like she's having a good time. I however am not. I've had on and off breakdowns i.e missing her and all that and it doesn't help I've been laid off on new years day so now I have no job and little to no chance of meeting her out there.
And even thought white lines comes across as a misogynistic bell end, pretty much what he describes is my biggest fear, her cheating on me drunkenly with some douchebag surfer dude. Even though I doubt she'll be the type to but she is a bad drunk :S. As well as the thought that we may not survive the full length of her trip. Furthermore, reading up on backpacking i was given the brief description of it as a time of 'drinking and fucking', the aussies being the worst culprits, and the rather depressing statistic that 70% of travellers to australia gain a sexual partner.
It doesn't help that I want her to be miserable and come back, but I am holding my tongue and not saying anything to make her feel bad, i don't want to ruin this trip for her. Which pretty much is the only thing I can do right now.
haha nah I'm not assuming anything about either of us being unfaithful, she's not that sort of person I hope. And i know i definitely won't, having been cheated on in the past.
And anyway, if super horny i always got my left and right...
I'm more concerned about the stress of not seeing one another for so long and her being so far away by herself. And how we are going to survive as a couple.
She's recently told me she's managed to get on a program where she stays and works at a farm, which immediately puts two alarms in my head
1. Staying with a random group of people in the outback (Texas chain saw massacre anyone)
2. Having no internet/phone(?) to communicate with.
So that's something to be worried about.
Though the main thing I'm worried about the next few months, when we more or less are going to be forced to talk about this trip and us. I don't know what to expect nor to aim for to get the best deal outta this trip.
Hey, thanks for replying
I do not intend to stop her going on her trip.
But I do not know how i'm going to cope with 4 months or longer. What do i say to her about us, and realistically what is going to happen out of this? Will 4 months be too long?
I've never been in a long distance relationship before, how does that even go about?
I think i'm ranting more than asking a valid question here.
I know we need to talk about this about what we are going to do. But I need some sort of expectation or maybe some confidence to back myself up.
As the title says, my gf is travelling around Australia by herself, for 4-6 months leaving around Christmas time this year.
We are yet to fully talk about it, but I am getting very apprehensive about it. Simply put, I don't want her to go even though I want her to enjoy herself.
Originally the both of us were planning to go travelling in our gap years, but unfortunately I was unable to find a job quick enough (fucking credit crash) and she's managed to get one fast as well as gain considerable investment from her parents (whom have bought her tickets). Though I swear she's overworking herself too, she's only contracted to work 20 hours but she works near double that in overtime to gain money for her trip, this of course leaves hardly any time for us two to spend together, and usually results in her being constantly tired, stressed and albeit slightly irritable. That is a different topic though.
The problem is, I don't know how to go about it. 4-6 months is a long time and we've only been going out for 5 or so months beforehand. I don't like the idea of such a distance between us two, where we are unable to have each others company. And I certainly do not like the idea of her travelling by herself in a faraway country for 4 fucking months! Though I do not want to admit that to her as I'm not normally a protective/jealous person, even though the prior sentences may prove otherwise.
Both of us have been dancing around the subject without hitting it straight on, because I think we both know the result won't be a good one. But I love her too much to see this relationship disintegrate.
She already told me once, she was considering to scupper her plans because she doesn't want to leave me, her friends and family behind, but i insisted she does as it is what she wanted to do for ages.
I sorta hit a brick wall here, and generally the only advice I've been given is '4 months is a long time, she'll get bored of it quickly and get back soon enough'. However, I do not think this will be the case as she has been going on about Australia for ages, and has spent the last month or so planning the journey to a fine detail, even planning as far as to upgrade her return ticket with its 4 month cap(in which she can fly home at any time during that period)to a ticket with a 6 month cap.
I pretty much do not know what to do or say. I know the best thing is to talk, but I am afraid things'll just go wrong.
Hello. Errrm, its weird me saying this, but i think my gf may have a problem.
I guess this because she has quite a large amount of body hair on her body, including on the nipples, arms and under her chin. But also she seems to have acne on her face as well as a pernament redness. Furthermore, her hands are always red and somewhat 'shiny' and she has bad circulation in those hands.
Just want to see what you guys say, so i know she is somewhat safe. I'm somewhat worried she may have a hormonal problem...
I've been swimming competitively since the age of three, but stopped round 14ish. Now that i'm 18, i would like to do it again.
However, id like to know how this would affect me physically, im already a tall, fairly skinny guy with a thin layer of fat on me but hardly any muscle tone. Would swimming boost up the tone?
I'm looking to swim something like 3 times a week, doing distance/drills and some sprint work to get me back to what i was. Any swimmers got any good programs for me on here?
Hey guys, i cant really thank you guys enough for trying to help me out, i really do appreciate it.
Im definitely cutting down on the drinking, i can say it was fun a few times, but not really much afterwards.
I think the problem i have is that i am scared of the unknown somewhat. Its like, im alright around people i know really well, but when i don't really know them, i get all shy n conservative, which being in a new place is always the case.
THe people who added me on msn n stuff, i do talk to every now and then at school, but thats when im around others, when its just one on one, which is basically msn, i get all insecure and stuff.
i guess i just need to talk more, and show a bit more of my personality. Gotta work on that, because there's definitely not a magic cure, no matter how close alcohol can be to it.
And im English, not American and as far as im aware there is no counsellor in my college :smirk:
Hey, ive recently moved up from high school and into college, im 17 and in the space of a few months had a complete shake up socially.
With my college choice, i ended up away from my closest friends, whom have all gone to the same college, which i hear about often about how great it is and the all different characters there and the general sense of fun.
This is in like complete contrast to my college.
I jumped in practically alone, there is two other people i knew before hand, but im not that great friends with them, but i ended up completely dependent on them, relying on them to make myself meet new people etc. The thing is, the people aren't exactly my kinda crowd, so i feel slightly alienated and out of place. and the entire place is so boring, its depressing hearing how fun the college is my old friends have gone to.
What else, is that some of the people from my new college who i have befriended somewhat, have added me on msn. Sounds alright, but now im shit scared of appearing online, i don't want to talk to them but yet i do in order to get to know them etc. But what usually happens is that i sit there appearing offline talking to nobody, not even to my old friends, which i feel are slowly distancing themselves from me. Sometimes, when i make myself appear online i usually have that dreaded quietness and awkward moments which i hate so dearly.
Im also slowly sliding into alcoholism, i regulary drink during free periods, which have led me to bunking a few lessons to me being completely hammered. I feel that the drink makes me more social etc so i connect to people more.
Ah, me and and this girl was on a friends bed, my friend had the house all by herself so everyone sorta hung round her house.
This girl, ive fancied ages and she likewise, but i refused to do anything about it, that evening i described to her many times why we could not be together, resulting in a ngiht of tears and many small talks with other people.
Anyway, me and her were on the bed, she was upset, and i was playfully flirting with her. I cant remember how, but this somehow resulted in her licking my arm, which i did the same to. SOunds weird, but from arm it went to ear, and then we just kissed full on the mouth there and then. I sorta ruined it though, as before we moved to further things, i stopped it and explained why we couldbt be again.
The other is with the same girl a week later, i was drunk with her in trafalgar square, and somehow i fell into the fountain (passed out) and as she tried draggin me out, i pulled her in. and then we just kissed again in the water in the fountain.