<span style="color: red">"It takes FAR MORE COURAGE to be KIND than it does to be CRUEL"</span> - CanadaCraig
It has been said that....
"Sticks and stones may break your bones
But words will never hurt you."
Most of us know from experience - that THAT is NOT the TRUTH.
In fact - WORDS can hurt more than anything else. They have the power to harm us in a way that goes SO deep into who we are and how are feel about ourselves - that we live with that hurt for a lifetime.
When we are a kid - we lack the capacity to appreciate that what someone might say to us - or about us - does not always have anything to do with who WE are. Kids take practically everything personally. If a kid has been subjected to the abuse of his or her self esteem by words - they will always be especially sensitive to what people SAY about them. Even when they're all grown up. That 'hurt' is an open wound - and anything that even gets near it - causes us to flinch - to pull back - to recoil. Some of us deal with that hurt by trying to gain the favour of those who hurt us in the first place. Perhaps by being 'perfect'. Some of us try to protect that 'open wound' by gaining weight or by numbing ourselves to the pain by [mis]using alcohol, drugs or sex. [Or maybe all of those things] The number of ways we can try to protect ourselves form that hurt is limited only by our imagination.
But none of those ways work.
The only way to heal those wounds is to attack the very thing that caused them in the first place.
We must replace those negative words with positive words.
Now many of you [IF you're anything like ME] will have little faith in the power of the positive. Negative - to us - seems more 'real'. So much so that we're all but convinced that anything positive is a fantasy. If anyone says anything positive about YOU - it probably feels like a LIE. And that's perfectly understandable. But the part of you that has more faith in the negative is the 'kid' in you. It is that 'child within' that is convinced that all of those negative messages were the truth. Children have amazing stubborn egos - and it's often difficult to get them change their minds. But because YOU are the 'grown up' now - it is that 'child within' that YOU are going to have to convince. The 'grown up' you [Or the 'adult you'] will respond to positive talk as if it is silly. But I assure you - that child within you is starving to hear those wonderful, affirming, positive words. So for that child's sake [That child within YOU] let 'it' KNOW that 'it' is special and valuable and important. Let 'it' KNOW that 'it' is smart and has tremendous potentional to make 'its' dreams come true. And most importantly - keep reminding that 'child' that he or she is LOVED.
You already KNOW just how power negative words can be - does it not stand to reason that positive words might be just as powerful?!
I SAY YES!!
Not quite sure about that?!
The next time you are given the opportunity to say something encouraging and positive to a child [And those opportunities come up all the time - you just have look for them] try it - and see for yourself the effect it has on that child. That is the exact same effect positive words will have on YOUR little child. It will take some time for those changes to take effect - of course. Those 'open wounds' have been around for a long time now [Most likely] So be patient - but never give up. Love never quits. So love yourself enough to never give up on YOU.
And start the New Year off with vowing to love yourself - to love that 'child within'. And BE the source of love that your 'inner child' so desperately needs - and deserves.
GREAT BIG HUG
I hope you're having a super duper day!!
I haven't been here in a long time. Lately - I've been especially stressed out. Like a lot of people - these days - I'm having money problems. Money itself is not the problem. The fact that I haven't got enough IS!! Oh well... I'm trying to work my way out of the hole I'm in. THAT - and a few other things - have really REALLY stressed me out. And when I'm stressed out I often get a patch of psoriasis ['sore-eye-a-sis'] in the middle of my chest. It's not too much and usually goes away in a day or two. Then it comes back and goes away again. But this time - psoriasis has 'attacked' my PENIS. And I have to admit - I'm upset. Although harmless [For the most part] and not even slightly contagious - it doesn't LOOK very good. In fact - it LOOKS like my penis has an STD. Psoriasis - in case you didn't know - is NOT a sexually transmitted disease. Some believe it is just one of the signs of an over-active immune system. Skin cells are being created at an alarming rate and building up on the effected part of the body. The type of psoriasis I have on my penis is called 'Inverse Psoriasis'. It's just red and looks like what your skin would look like if you tore off a scab from a wound. [If that makes sense] The psoriasis that's on my penis doesn't scab up OR [which is common with most cases of psoriasis] flake off. [At least not so you - or I - would notice] Usually - when someone has psoriasis on the penis - it's on the head. But sometimes - as it is in my case - it's on the shaft. About half of my shaft has the red patches. I hope it goes away - and stays away. [Something that psoriasis often does - no matter where it is on the body]
Why am I telling you all of this? Well... who ELSE am I going to tell!! But not just for that reason - I'd love to know if any of YOU have ever had - or presently have - psoriasis on your penis. [Or any where else on your body]
Have a great day!!
GREAT BIG HUG
I hope you're OK.
I joined the YMCA in June. Quite a big deal for me what with my insecurities and all!! That said.... what's the deal? I go to the 'Y' practically every day. I got the upgraded 'mens plus' membership that includes a special locker room with sauna, steam room and hot tub. Suffice it to say - I've seen a LOT of penises in the last couple of months. More than I've seen [In person!!] in DECADES!! I've noticed two things. I bet of all the penises I've seen - 95% of them are UNCIRCUMCISED!! I thought most guys in North America - especially my part of N.A. - would be 'cut'. But that sure doesn't seem to be the case. Are 'cut' guys to shy to walk about naked? And what about SIZE? It would appear that - other than one old Asian man and an unusual looking tall white guy - I have the smallest penis the 'Y' has ever seen. My penis is about 3" soft. But it might as well be 1" soft in comparison to what all the other guys seem to have. Being naked with a bunch of guys is - for me - difficult enough without having to be faced with the fact [?] that I'm obviously the 'small guy'.
IF all you 'regular sized guys' are hiding somewhere - please oh please - show yourselves. Go to the 'Y' and GET NAKED!! I don't want to be the only 'average guy' out there.
It does make me question what the 'average size' really is - I have to say that.
Any thoughts on this?!
Have a great day!!
GREAT BIG HUG
I hope you're OK.
I appreciate you're desire to become a husband and a father. I think for many gay males - the idea of having children is quite strong. I know - speaking for myself - that I have often felt 'left out' knowing that when I die there will be no son or daughter of mine that will mourn my death. And most likely - few who will even care that I'm gone. I'm often haunted by that fact. But in spite of that - I chose not to burden another fellow human [Specifically - a women who was more than willing to become my wife - even though she fully understood and accepted my lack of sexual desire for her] by allowing that person to have to live with the knowledge that they would always love me in a way that I was incapable of loving them.
When it comes to your desire to become a married man and have children - I think it's important to keep in mind that LOVE is anchored on HONESTY. Without honesty - there can be no LOVE. And it sounds to me that you're intending to mislead another person into believing something that is not true. Unlike the woman who was willing to marry me - you are willing to mislead a woman into believing something that is NOT true. The Christian God - at least - warns us that all LIES will eventually be revealed. And often - revealed while we are still mere mortals. So in spite of your intentions to keep your thoughts, feelings and desires to yourself [Insofar as your sexual attraction to guys is concerned] there will most likely come a time that those who love you most [Your future wife and kids] WILL discover the reality of who it is you really are. And if not - that 'secret' will reveal itself in other ways. 'Secrets' have a way of rotting things from the inside. Although everything may seem OK for awhile - on the surface - eventually a 'secret' will show itself and by the time it does - the damage has been done. You may find yourself keeping a safe, emotional distance from your wife and children - lest they get 'too close' and SEE the 'real you'. This happens a lot. People with 'secrets' become guarded and distant. And the more they struggle with keeping the 'secret' the more guarded and distant they become. Many people with 'secrets' also become alcoholics and/or drug addicts. And although that may not happen to you - I wouldn't bet against the very real possibility that - in time - you could turn your 'religion' into your 'addiction'. You may begin to act as if you are 'better than' and more 'saintly' and in doing so - start to have unrealistic expectations of your wife and kids. People often try to hide their 'secrets' by acting as if they have none at all. They also often focus all of their attention on what they perceive to be the 'secrets' of others. [If I can make someone else feel guilty for being human and flawed - then maybe they won't see that I'm human and flawed] So you see, Jase - although your desires are noble - you are going about achieving them in a veil of deceit. You are PLANNING on LYING to someone you haven't even met yet. The God that I believe in - the Christian God - frowns upon that. [To put it mildly]
The ONLY WAY you can get what it is you so desperately want - and remain in good standing with God - is to be upfront and honest with any women that you would like to marry. Anything short of total honesty would be considered - by me at least - the very first step in a future fraught with great sadness. And not just for you - but for your wife and whoever it is that you both bring into this world.
That all said... The Christian God has great respect for those who choose to remain single. For the single person can dedicate far more of his or her time on doing those things that are most pleasing to God.
Please give yourself plenty of time to consider what it is you do next.
GREAT BIG HUG
Hi Everyone!! :smile:
**I hope you're OK. **
I think MOST people [Including MOST teenagers] think that 95% of teenagers have had sexual intercourse. "Everybody is doing it!!" And that's the LIE they are trying to combat with that 53%.
I'll never stop being amazed at how willing people are to accept and to believe so-called statistics. Especially statistics that have to do with sexuality. How many teenagers would even respond to such a question? And if they did - how many GIRLS would say NO and how many BOYS would say YES!! [Whether or not that was the truth]
GBH - Craig!! :smile:
I hope you're having a great day!!
I live in Victoria, British Columbia, CANADA. Victoria is the capital city of B.C. And TODAY - I am VERY proud of my Province. For TODAY - February the 27th is 'Anti-Bullying Day'.
The Province of British Columbia is proclaiming Feb. 27 as Anti-Bullying Day to support efforts to end bullying in schools and communities across the province, Premier Gordon Campbell announced today.
“Nobody likes a bully and we all have to take a stand to stop bullying,” said Campbell. “Anti-Bullying Day is a celebration of those who take action to stop bullies in our schools and around the province. It starts with all of us saying bullying is wrong and then standing up for those who become targets. We all benefit when everyone feels safe and secure in their schools, neighbourhoods and province."
Anti-Bullying Day highlights British Columbia’s commitment to a safe and inclusive province and is an opportunity to actively promote respectful and kind behaviour among citizens. It recognizes efforts to build communities that foster respect, fairness, equity and compassion, and to celebrate the actions of individuals, schools and communities to address bullying, harassment and intimidation.
“Student safety is a top priority, and we know that when students feel safe and accepted among their peers, they do better at school,” said Education Minister Shirley Bond. “Anti-Bullying Day is another step towards uniting as a province to find tangible solutions so that all British Columbians can feel safe and achieve their best.”
Last spring, the Province passed legislation requiring all B.C. schools have codes of conduct for their students that meet provincial standards. This step fulfills a platform commitment to institute “zero tolerance” of bullying in B.C. schools. The Ministry of Education and the Ministry of Public Safety and Solicitor General are also updating the Focus on Bullying and Focus on Harassment and Intimidation guides, and a parent brochure will soon be in schools to help families better understand their shared role with schools in bullying prevention.
“The Province thanks CKNW and Christy Clark for helping to promote Anti-Bullying Day in B.C.,” said Campbell. “We encourage everyone to wear pink on Feb. 27 to show your opposition to bullying – I know I will.”
GREAT BIG HUG
I hope you're OK.
ME hope you're OK!!
I know exactly what you mean.
Another 'thing' that bugs me is how all of us are now referred to as 'guys'. Guys are guys and GIRLS are guys. "Hey you guys....!!" UGH!! How very 'trailer park'.
GBH - Craig!!
I hope you're OK.
Senator Barack Obama declined an invitation to attend the annual 'State of the Black Union' forum in New Orleans. Obama's decision not to attend has been criticized by Travis Smiley - the man hosting the event. Mr. Smiley's criticisms have been responded to [by some people] in a rather unpleasant way. He has been inundated with angry e-mails and even DEATH THREATS. Some people are harassing his family - including his MOM.
I wonder. [Having already posted a message about this before]
Is this a preview of things to come? Will Americans eventually become too fearful to criticize a President Obama?!
Click on THIS to read the story.
GREAT BIG HUG
CraigOriginally Posted By: IneligibleNot written by John Cleese: http://www.snopes.com/politics/satire/revocation.asp
Well I'm SURE he must have READ it!!
And that's good enough for ME!!
GBH - Craig!!
PS I hope you're OK.
I hope you're having a great day.
Britain is Repossessing the U.S.A.
A Message from John Cleese
To the citizens of the United States of America:
In light of your failure to nominate competent candidates for President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective immediately.
Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths, and territories (except Kansas, which she does not fancy).
Your new prime minister, Gordon Brown, will appoint a governor for America without the need for further elections.
Congress and the Senate will be disbanded.
A questionnaire may be circulated next year to determine whether any of you noticed.
To aid in the transition to a British Crown Dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect:
You should look up 'revocation' in the Oxford English Dictionary.
1. Then look up aluminium, and check the pronunciation guide. You will be amazed at just how wrongly you have been pronouncing it.
2. The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'favour' and 'neighbour.' Likewise, you will learn to spell 'doughnut' without skipping half the letters, and the suffix -ize will be replaced by the suffix -ise.
Generally, you will be expected to raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels. (look up 'vocabulary').
3. Using the same twenty-seven words interspersed with filler noises such as 'like' and 'you know' is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication.
There is no such thing as US English. We will let Microsoft know on your behalf. The Microsoft spell- checker will be adjusted to take account of the reinstated letter 'u' and the elimination of -ize. You will relearn your original national anthem, God Save The Queen.
4. July 4th will no longer be celebrated as a holiday.
5. You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers, or therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and therapists shows that you're not adult enough to be independent.
Guns should only be handled by adults. If you're not adult enough to sort things out without suing someone or speaking to a therapist then you're not grown up enough to handle a gun.
6. Therefore, you will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more dangerous than a vegetable peeler. A permit will be required if you wish to carry a vegetable peeler in public.
7. All American cars are hereby banned. They are crap and this is for your own good. When we show you German cars, you will understand what we mean.
8. All intersections will be replaced with roundabouts, and you will start driving on the left with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go metric with immediate effect and without the benefit of conversion tables.
Both roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense of humour.
9. The Former USA will adopt UK prices on petrol (which you have been calling gasoline)-roughly $6/US gallon. Get used to it.
10. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call French fries are not real chips, and those things you insist on calling potato chips are properly called crisps. Real chips are thick cut, fried in animal fat, and topped not with ketchup but with vinegar.
11. The cold tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually beer at all. Henceforth, only proper British Bitter will be referred to as beer, and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be referred to as Lager.
South African beer is also acceptable as they are pound for pound the greatest sporting Nation on earth and it can only be due to the beer. They are also part of British Commonwealth - see what it did for them.
12. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as good guys. Hollywood will also be required to cast English actors to play English characters.
Watching Andie McDowell attempt English dialogue in Four Weddings and a Funeral was an experience akin to having one's ears removed with a cheese grater.
13. You will cease playing American football. There is only one kind of proper football; you call it soccer. Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play rugby (which has some similarities to American football, but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full Kevlar body armour like a bunch of nancies). Don't try Rugby - the South Africans and Kiwis will thrash you, like they regularly thrash us.
14. Further, you will stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host an event called the World Series for a game which is not played outside of America. Since only 2.1% of you are aware that there is a world beyond your borders, your error is understandable. You will learn cricket, and we will let you face the South Africans first to take the sting out of their deliveries.
15. You must tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us mad.
16. An internal revenue agent (i.e. tax collector) from Her Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all monies due (backdated to 1776).
17. Daily Tea Time begins promptly at 4 pm with proper cups, never mugs, with high quality biscuits (cookies) and cakes; strawberries in season.
God save the Queen.
Only He can.
Signed - John Cleese
GREAT BIG HUG