You're right, it's a horrible way to die - it was a long drawn out process of a slow shutdown, which was not nice for me to watch - it seems no one seems to know the exact answer to this question I asked regarding the fluid upon death - I hope someone reads this who knows what it is...
For my peace of mind, I would hate to think my dad knew what was happening in his final minutes of life...
Hello, (this is quite a gruesome topic, so don't read if you are easily upset.)
It's been about a year and a half since my last post - in brief the last one was a question about kidney cancer involving my father - who 5 weeks ago passed away from this hideous disease.
( http://www.afraidtoask.com/forums/ubbthreads.php/ubb/showflat/Number/308804/page/1#Post308804 )
Anyway - long story short, I am here to ask if anyone else has had a friend/or family member pass away from KIDNEY FAILURE due to cancer/any other disease/cause.
I have been looking around on the internet trying to find information I need but it's not proving so helpful.
I'm trying to find out for my own peace of mind what happens to someone's body when it shuts down due to Renal Failure.
The end was not particularly nice for my dear old dad, being far too young at only 61 - he was in quite alot of pain while passing urine, and even though he was in a comatose state, he would awake during urination, open his eyes in absolute AGONY and try to pull out his catheter - but would not speak, which was very upsetting for me and the rest of the family.
I have most the understanding I need for acceptance on this subject apart from one thing which has confused me and my family since he died, (we were there at the moment of passing)
Upon death, his eye's opened, and "something" (being a fluid) came from his mouth, and I don't mean a little bit of red blood, this was a brown liquid, and I am talking alot of it - if I were to approximate, I would say roughly one pint or more...and it came in waves, every 5 or so seconds apart - this was THE worst part of the whole ordeal as it made the whole thing almost into a horror movie - does anyone know what this was, and what caused it?
I can only assume, a hemorrhage - was it from the lungs? the bowels? I don't know...
We were there for 5 days solid until he finally died.
If anyone can help me on this it would be much appreciated. If you know someone it happened to, etc.
I believe your topic is true mate totally, I infact have ended up much like my father, so has my brother, my best mate is also like his dad... maybe it's something to do with growing up, just like infant animals follow their parents in the wild.. who knows?!
I have some rather boring post on the "relationship" forum about my ex gf, and she turned into her mother totally, probably why we split... so I think so yeah...
But now you've read that thinking "aargh" my own mum isn't anything like her mum, because of meeting my dad.... so, with the right circumstances.. not so true
Yeah, he also has one other "secondary" on his lung too...
Apparently chemo is not an option because it's inside the pancreas as opposed to growing on the outside of it, I think that's what was said, unless I heard it wrong.
Yeah it went into metastasis, he was told after his initial operation, a MINUTE part of the tumour escaped into a near by vein... I guess that's why this has happened now?
Either way... bleh! I guess we'll just have to hope time is on our side, and as it's a secondary it's not going to be as aggressive as first hand pancreatic cancer..
I'm still waiting for a post from someone who ideally knows someone who had kidney cancer then a secondary in the pancreas, but I guess the chances of that are rather slim.
Good reply adel!
Well, I admit she is being ridiculously stupid over being engaged so soon, but I believe it's a rebound thing off me, I couldn't really explain much more in the original post as it would take FAR too long... essentially she was madly in love with me, would have done anything for me, but because I fell out with her mum she has had to meet someone new (I did dump her in the end cos thing's got so bad)
We still speak, infact spoke alot today, but she shy's away from how she feels, always has done, since the day I met.. for instance if I go see her (even now) and say, what went wrong, let's talk and sort this out, she just say's as little as possible then ends up crying.. maybe she hurts because she wants me but doesn't think she can?
I tried to get her to fight for her freedom, but in the end that's what killed the relationship.. not due to differences..
So, my dad had cancer of the Kidney 12 years ago.. operated on, recovered, all fine...
Yearly full body scans to check for it's return, all been clear up until 2 weeks ago, detected it in his pancreas..
I know for a fact pancreatic cancer has a VERY bleak outcome (2% chance of surviving 5 years) as my dad's best friend had it and died from it within 2 years...
The only "positive" side to this is it is not directly pancreatic cancer, it is a secondary of his Kidney cancer, which was not a hugely aggressive tumour..
Currently it is 2mm in size, and has grown 1mm in 1 year so far..(they had an eye on it, or something like that)
He's being treated privately at the Royal Marsdon in London, which to my knowledge is one of the best places to be.. but even they have apparently said it can't be operated on even though it's very small, because it's inside or something.
So what i'm asking is, has anyone here had any previous experience with this condition, whether it be you, family member, friend, someone you knew.. etc etc..
I am not asking about pancreatic cancer, please only post if you know about secondary cancer within the pancreas..