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  • R
    Resurrection

    When you posted this

    " You have some very rigid ideas on relationships. Believe it or not, there are people who've had a sexual liaison early on, and have gone on to long, fulfilling relationships and marriages. When you use words like "disgusted" and "waste dump", I get the feeling that, deep down, you consider the act of sex to be dirty. I agree that the storybook romance is the ideal, but it's not always available. To put it coarsely, casual sex is like a hamburger, and sex in the context of a deeply loving relationship is like a filet mignon (my apologies to the vegetarians). An ideal relationship is something to aspire to, but I don't think we should make blanket judgments about other people's sex lives. "

    I wasn't sure who you were talking to.

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  • R
    Resurrection

    Are you directing that at me?

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  • R
    Resurrection

    I thought that could be the case, but I just couldn't see it in what I was reading. It's a relief to see a lot more people are more involved with people they're sexually involved with. It makes me feel a little more comfortable about possibly sharing my opinions about it.

    Also, you asked if my relationship was strictly online, by that I think you mean nothing but text messaging. Well we met online, so naturally we communicate the most online, over instant messengers. But like I said we've been together for going on 2 years, and we've shared countless pictures, videos, talked on the phone, been through hell and back, and had very romantic moments, open lovey moments, problems, surprises, but we've prevailed through it all, and I'm very confident that she's the one I'm going to spend my life with.

    I'd agree most online relationships don't work out, but personally I think I'm a good judge of character both online and offline, and I haven't followed the typical path of an online relationship.

    Thanks for your comments everyone.

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  • R
    Resurrection

    What about the love? I see the having sex, sex with brothers, sisters, people your age, older or younger, flings and lasting relationships, but what about the love? I came here for the insights, but I can't enjoy reading about so much sex when I can't see any love involved.

    There's a thread where someone said he wanted to give his girlfriend oral sex so she'd give him oral sex. What happened to giving someone oral sex as a form of expression, rather than of selfish desire, or because you enjoy it because of your hormones.

    I'm only 17, but it seems that for a long time, I've known more love than most of the people here, the way they talk anyways. I'm still a virgin, though I've had some sexual experiences mostly as a much smaller kid, back when I was very young.

    I don't want to be misunderstood, I'm not trying to insult everyone here, it just bothers me to see so much about sex, but as an industrialized.. tool.. of interaction between either two fairly close people or even random strangers, rather than something precious, or expressive, or special.

    But maybe I'm mistaken. I'd enjoy hearing some people talk about their love experiences with people they've shared themselves sexually with, or something. The love I've found is a girl I met online and we've been together for nearly 2 years now. I know peoples general reaction to online relationships, about how it's always a fat man in a trailer in the middle of nowhere who's also a stalker rapist with apparently millions of dollars to spend on technology just to trick me and lure me close enough to have freaky man sex with me, and also how it doesn't mean anything.. and it's shallow and you can never trust anyone etc etc etc..

    Well unlike the impression most people have of it, our relationship is a serious one and I don't want anyone to take it incredibly jokingly or lightly.

    Anyways, no offenses intended, feel free to comment.

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  • R
    Resurrection

    I would see this simply as temptation, but I think you already know it's not the right thing to do. Sure, some people would say "Go for it man! What could you lose?"

    In the end it's completely up to you, but since you asked. The moral decision would be to tell her "It's tempting, but it doesn't seem right." and save that part of yourself and your life for someone you're really in love with and someone who loves you back in the same way.

    It can sound just like what all the goody goody people would tell you, but it's what'd make you happier in the end. Remember you can have as much meaningless sex as you want, but 1,000,000 meaningless sexual experiences doesn't equal 1 meaningful sexual experience.

    Hope it helps.

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