I haven't been on here in a long long time, mainly because I'm busy with my wife and son, both of whome wouldn't have happened if it weren't for A2A.
From the looks of things, the general quality of posts seems to have dropped a bit. I have a lot of fond memories of this place!
I've been in a fairly similar situation before.
Going to see this guy probably isn't going to go well. It's up to her to tell him to go away now. If you trust her, you will allow her to do this for herself. If you don't trust her, then maybe you should rethink things.
If you go to see him, not only will it piss her off because it's something she should do, but it will also let this guy know that you feel threatened by him, and it gives him extra strength.
Voice your concerns to your girlfriend. Let her know that she can still have a working relationship with the guy, but that she needs to tell him where his boundaries are and that he needs to respect them.
Good luck brah
Could it be that you are actually really interested in anal activity but try to convince yourself that you're not so that you don't feel bad that you can't/won't try it?
I used to have that about sex. I would purposely think to myself "eurgh. Sex is gross. All those bodily fluids...and I'd be stabbing her with my cock!...and what if I came?! I feel sick. Bleugh." etc, when actually I was just upset because I'd never had sex.
Now I have had sex I love it! The more fluids the better! Haha.
Could you be doing something similar? There are plenty of things in the world that I don't like, but I don't make threads about them! So why do you make threads about assholes and poo?
I'm gonna second people's thoughts here, but reword them slightly.
Your post has a very defensive tone to it. I could imagine your voice reading it out sounding quite sarcastic even.Originally Posted By: aquariusI can't stop laughing here.
i often ask how is my ex doing, just out of curiosity not out of jealousy or anything.
no one in their right mind would ask someone to marry them only 4 months into the relationship.
Are you actually laughing? Really?
Why did you feel the need to tell us that it wasn't jealousy. To me that sounds like someone saying "Oh no! The vase is broken. IT WASNT ME!"
Now some might argue that I am also being defensive as I asked my fiancée to marry me after only a few months...but we are living together and we are very much in love. I wouldn't change a thing.
Why have you taken such offence to this guy getting engaged? Why did you even feel it necessary to make a fairly long post about it. Did you just want people to reply with "omg he's stupid it's never gonna work?"
I'm not being mean - I'm just trying to say I think you need to think about how this situation makes you feel. It might help you come to terms with it.
sadbuttrueOriginally Posted By: Celithrathienim pretty damn sure that he's gonna get attached. this, is awesome. im not really ready for a relationship right now either
Oh you're setting yourself up for misery here.
You say you're sure he's gonna get attached. But you don't want a relationship.
So what happens when he does get attached and you don't want a relationship? You're gonna tell him to go away? Unlikely.
Or are you gonna be over the moon and accept him into your open arms with delight?
But wait - didn't you say you didn't want a relationship? Ah I see, you actually do want one and were just trying to convince yourself that you didn't.
See where I'm going?
He has already said he doesn't want a relationship. Which means he gets to bang you, and if he finds someone better (which he believes he will) then you will get tossed out like yesterdays garbage.
Now imagine how you'll feel when that happens. You'll probably try and say to yourself "it's cool. I didn't want a relationship anyway..."
but you have already said:Originally Posted By: Celithrathienyou have no idea how amazing he is.
So you clearly have feelings for him.
You're setting yourself up for heartbreak, because once you get closer you will fall in love, and he wont, and then he'll leave and crush your soul.
We've seen this a lot on this forum...please don't set yourself up for heartbreak.