"I have a fine sense of the ridiculous, but no sense of humor."<br /><br />- Edward Albee
Unsupervised...I have to agree with you. TROLL.
You came on to this site posting a very long rant about not wanting to be gay. You were explained to that it wasn't a choice and that maybe you were just curious. You went on to say that it was perverted and that gay men were sexual deviants. You were repremanded of course because this a forum where we accept those lifestyles. You got angry, defensive, and said more rude offensive things. You then said you didn't understand why you were even on the site.
After your fruitless attempts of convincing anyone that gay men are terrible, perverted, rapists, you then write another post that has again angered many of the members. You are getting honest outllooks on the situation but you refuse to listen to it. You act as though these people are angering you by what you're saying but continue to post responses. You know that you aren't going to convince anyone, just like last time.
So either you are just fucking with us, you are really this narrowminded, or you are trying to convince yourself.
It is hard to believe you are a real person. Yes, there are people like you, but none that would argue this long about something that no one agrees with you on.
It's hard to fathom that any of this is true.
But let's say it is true. No one here wants to offend you. Everyone is simply giving their outlook. You are the picking fights.
A. Under law, what you experienced was not rape or sexual assault. Look up the laws.
B. To convict someone of murder, motive is not required, only malice aforethought. You and your buddy planned to go beat up this man because you were angry. Had you killed him, you could technically be charged with murder. Many states do not change sentencing based on intoxication.
C. Men touch and rub women they do not know it bars all of the time. It isn't sexual assault.
D. If you were to hit on a gay woman, would you think it just if she beat your ass?
E. If you find yourself so unappealing, then why are people hitting on you?
F. You need a lesson in current social structure. It would be a major mistake to assume everyone is straight. Gay men and women are on the rise.
G. There are no straight or gay bars. And one is allowed to hit on whomever they please (unless they are underage if course). It's every humans' right.
H. There are no gay signals unless you make them that way. Most of my gay friends are quite normal. They get hit on by girls and are not defined by their sexuality. Not all lesbians are butches. Not all gay men paint their toenails and talk with a lisp. That's a sterotype that you need to push out of your head.
I. If you are messing with this forum, leave. There are people here truly trying to find answers.
We want to help. But you have to be willing to admit you're wrong sometimes.
Thank you guys.
I feel like I just needed to talk it out.
Just now I got an honesty box message on facebook "I know your secret. Are you gonna come out gay boy, or should I do it for you?"
And I just laughed.
Sexuality doesn't define you.
And these people think they are so powerful, but really all they had to do was ask and I'd be honest.
I'm glad we see eye to eye on that point :D.
I should do an infomercial on AIDS.
Wear a condom. Even if you aren't a fanny bandit you can get HIV. Autoimmune Deficiency Syndrome is not picky.
Also, if you call right now you can get our amazing blender, The Magic Bullet, half off!
It does help, OldFolks.
I am not ashamed, nor am I really that worried.
My thoughts are that friends should be friends no matter what. My two best friends know. And that's really all I care about. I guess I am just asking how to tell people. I don't think it's really necessary to walk up and go "hey, I'm dating a guy now."
So I think I've just decided that if I'm asked, I'll be honest.
My parents are both very southern. My mom is super religious. And my dad is one of those redneck men who takes pride in a manly son that passes on the family name. I do think my mom would accept it eventually. My dad is a different story. But I feel like I should hold off until I'm no longer financially dependent on my mother. I may never tell my dad. It would kill him.
And who knows, this could be the only guy I ever date.
I may hold off until it gets more serious.
I can accept I was wrong on the facts.
But my point still stands: AIDS is not a gay disease.
The thing I am tired of is the thought that AIDS is a means of irradication by some higher power. I was watching a show on Discovery and people gave population control testimonials. It makes me sick.
To be cliche. Why can't we just all get along?
I have talked some about this on other posts as a side note. But here I am needing advice.
I've dated a lot of girls -- had sex with a few of them. I've been in love. I've been heartbroken. I've broken a few hearts. I've had a good teenage life. I'm 18 and in college. And I've talked to a few guys before. I have flirted on the phone or online (always with guys I knew, nothing creepy). So I think deep down I've always had an attraction to guys. But when it came down to going on a date them, I never felt enough to follow through. I always backed out and chucked it up to curiosity.
I've had the same best friend since 6th grade. And he has a step brother that's his age. They are both 17. A couple of years ago, his brother cane out. And last year, he started dating a kid that I knew from debate. Well they broke up this summer.
About a month and a half ago, I started talking via texting and phone calls to this guy -- my best friends brothers ex, Gray. We have gone on a few dates. And this weekend we had a debate tournament that my college and his high school went to. He and his best friend had their own room. His friends girlfriend spent the night both nights and so did I.
Sunday night, he asked me to be his boyfriend. I said yes. I don't regret it. I didn't have any qualms. But I am scared. I'm scared of what my friends will think. And I really don't want to hurt his ex because we are friends. How do I tell people? How do I just have a boyfriend?
I like him. I'm happy. Shouldn't that be all that matters?
Also, yes we are debaters. But we are attractive. We aren't nerdy. Just saying. Secondly, he's 18 too. I'm not breaking any laws. Thirdly, my parents don't support homosexuality or bisexuality, do I tell them? I don't want to get disowned.
I first want to start by saying: HIV/AIDS isn't considered a gay disease in anywhere except Anerica. The first person to come to the United States with AIDS was a gay flight attendant. They have actually traced it back. He was British and didn't sleep with women, obviously. That's why more gay men got
AIDS in the US.
Secondly, I want to say a few more things to you shawanuga. We are the same age.
But there are a lot of differences between me and you.
You were scared of getting cancer.
I got it. And fought. And survived.
You are scared if being gay. Or rather, disgusted you have gay feelings. I felt the same way. I was ashamed. But the thing is, I was never socially awkward. My dad was present. I never acted feminine. My mom didn't baby me. I've slept with a lot of girls. I've dated even more. I've never seen gay porn. And I have to tell you, histor tells us that men were gay even in Roman times. It's not the internet or a product if society. It's what happens.
But I haven't been happy. I don't sleep. I don't eat. I felt a hole in my life.
But a few weeks ago a guy approached me. I knew he was gay. I had talked to guys on the Internet before. But he was different. We texted. We talked on the phone. And finally we went on our first date this last weekend. And he's not feminine. He's normal. He has a lot of friends. And he isn't obsessed with dick or being gay or fucking. We talk about everything: movies, life, school, friends, drugs, anything and everything. I never get bored of him. And ya know what? He kissed me. He held my hand. He was sweet. And I'm falling for him.
This might be too much information. But you have to understand that I'm finally happy. It won't be easy. My mom and dad hate gay people. But I'm ready to face it. I'm ready because I care about this boy and he truly cares back. You pervert something beautiful. You are looking at it the wrong way. Try to open up to the possibility that being gay isn't disgusting. It can't be avoided. And sometimes the love of a woman isn't enough. You don't have to be gay. I'm not offended. But other people are. You are entitled to your opinion. But don't hurt others. We want to help. That's the point. But you have to listen. Don't get so defensive.
Ya know, no one benefits from that.
You're smart. You've made a lot more effort to understand things than a lot of people would.
You came here.
You wanted help.
So don't give up.
Let someone be there for you.
I understand depression.
I tried to kill myself in 9th grade.
Depression isn't pretty for everyone.
I mean, you could give up.
You could stop trying.
You could hide away and let things run their course.
Or you could fight.
You could get over the "normal" people.
No one is normal. I'm sorry. It's true.
Everyone is a little screwed up.
What separates the "normal" people from the rest is the willingness to fight. The willingness to take control of their own lives. You can do that. You can be happy. It's not something just handed to you. You have to work for it.
Why are you so very unhappy?
Is it because of the gay thing? Because that's something a lot of people can help with here.
Is it because you can't fond a girl? You're young. You don't know what lies ahead. You can't worry about it so much. Live life. Find good, solid friends. If you keep chasing girls the right one may never pop up. I truly believe everyone has someone they are meant to be with. So don't fret. Don't hide away or kill yourself. If you do then all the great things I'm sure you are capable of won't happen. The person out there that you could wake up to and kiss every morning will be denied what they deserve.
So live. People suck. The world sucks.
Don't let that change you.
I understand you want support.
I understand you are struggling.
But I also understand that you are looking at this the wrong way.
Murder, theft, assault -- we learned those things were not genetic. Remeber Eugenics?
But we have evidence, research, that being gay is nature not nurture.
You and I have a lot in common.
I used to masturbate to gay porn.
I'd get horny around my male friends.
I talked to boys on the Internet.
Then I would cum and feel disgust and shame.
I've been raised all my life that being gay is wrong.
And I'm an atheist as well. I have strong scientific convictions.
So I understand that genes are genes.
I have wanted to go to law school all my life.
I was on the debate team for four years.
Last year, I was the number one debater in my state. I led my team to Movk Trial nationals where we placed VERY high.
And when people hear me speak, they turn heads. They don't think "I wonder if he's gay". They say "he's going to do something great". I have a dad. I have a lot of guy and girl friends. I'm popular. I'm good looking. I wasn't bullied. I've had sex with 12 girls multiple times. NONE OF IT MATTERS.
Right now, I am the happiest I've ever been. I am talking to a boy. And he's amazing. He isn't flamboyant. He's kind and caring and smart. He gives me butterflies. And I want to have kids and a family. But adoption is fine for me.
I am in college. And no one thinks I'm gay. Men don't approach me. And I don't know if I'm gay. But I know I like one boy. And you know what? When I masturbate to him I feel no shame.
I don't care if I'm gay or straight. I'm going to law school. I'm smart. I'm driven. I was accepted into 7 of the top 30 colleges. I am going to be in politics someday. And I'm going to help people. You obviosly think there is more to life than eating, sleeping, and reproducing. You yourself want to go to law school and have a family. You want happiness just like everyone else. You have to stop worrying what people will think. Fuck them. More and more movies are portraying gays as normal, because they are. Black men and women are still portrayed as gangsters or thugs or uneducated. Do think that black people want to bleach their skin? Or learn to be white because of some racist driven demographic? No.
Be who you are. I can't tell you if you're gay or bi. I can't tell you how to be "less gay" whatever that means.
All I can say is that gay men and women are normal. They are people and deserve respect. Saying they are like pedophiles or deviants is nothing more than a logical fallacy. It's a straw man argument.
Live life. Don't worry about other people. Do something great. I know I will. I don't let the stupidity if humanity change me. If you hate humanity so much, if you dislike people so much, then why do you let them influence your life decisions?
I'm sorry if I was rude.
I hope it helps.